Oh you love it

Well Kurdt pulled himself out of the vicious spiral. He seems pretty ok. I’m almost done with the book, so he must have a horrible relapse. He wrote a really nice note to his dad about how he doesn’t hate him, and he also wrote a really interesting love note to Courtney Love. He’s working on In Utero (geez did I have to wrack my brain to come up with that title) and he seems pretty into it. Something’s got to give though. Only 50 pages left. Quick read, I wouldn’t recommend it unless you are really into Nirvana.

Big practice with the band tonight. I had the kids last night and got home late. I just wanted to crash but I had to break down my drums and load them into the car. Good times. It wasn’t too bad. I’m a little worried cuz I packed my drums in the car and then drove it to park by the train. I hope I don’t come back to smashed windows and no drums. That would suck major balls. I also have the meeting today with the guys from Red Tape Theater. It should be good. I think the guy from work who is in the theater is gonna go, and another guy at work who is interested in being a bored member. Using bored instead of board is a Cobain thing. He does it all the time and you would think it’s clever, but it’s really annoying. The guy is obviously intelligent, but his grammar is not the best, you have to wonder if he’s trying to pull a cute pun, or if he just effed up. Hopefully I’ll have lots to report tomorrow. I was thinking about it this morning and it will be cool to hang out with these dudes and jam. There is always something to be gained from meeting new people and sharing information. I’m fired up. Should be a blast. Rock is good. I’m ready to rock out.

I guess I shouldn’t pretend like there isn’t an elephant in the room. I’m not quite over that thing with the girl. I’m really getting there though. It’s funny how the mind works and how it heals itself. I’ve been thinking about this a lot of different ways. At the very basic level, we were not compatible. She is a vegetarian, into languages, into world travel, very active, ran a half marathon (and put up a very good time), young, beautiful, successful?, mother of 2 young kids, seemingly pretty serious, foodie?, likes to cook, she might like to camp, don’t know if she likes animals, etc. She’s also going through a divorce just like me, so there’s that, she just started a new job. I’m not really buying that she didn’t have time to communicate, she just didn’t want to. I think that’s pretty obvious from the choice she made on Sunday. I’m not gonna say that I didn’t fuck it up, but she could’ve understood my frustration and said “hang in there we’ll talk soon.” She took the out because she wanted it. Maybe she does like me, but she def wanted to simplify. So I was thinking last night about writing her a serious goodbye, I just basically tossed out a “ThX, good luck with everything” final comment cuz I was pissed that she dissed me. As I was thinking about what I would say, part of it went something like this “I just wanted someone to share things with” and I was going to go into a list of things over the last month that I would have shared with her if she was remotely accessible or communicative. It was a long list. Then it dawned on me, she doesn’t want to share things with me, and she doesn’t want me to share things with her. I should just find someone who wants to share things. If the person I find wants to share her stevens, that’s fine too. As far as the goodbye goes, I don’t have anything to say. I was also gonna mention that I have tix to see The National at the Riv. I got the tix cuz she’s really into the National. Now it’s sold out. I dunno. It might be a good idea to leave it a few weeks and then text her to see if you would want to go to the National just as buds or something. I can’t decide. Or I could sell the tix for twice face and go to the boats.

Lotsa steeuff going on. I’m going to the ND game on Sat which should be fun. Kinda bummed to miss M’s opener, but we might get our dicks slapped by UConn, so I’m probably not missing much. I’ve got other things going on that are top secret. If I have news, you’ll hear it. The boys play their first football games on Sunday. That should be fun. I dunno what else. That’s it.