Fryday

Well I reached out to 3 new women last night. One of them is drop dead smoking. She went to Wisconsin and is blonde. I’m a sucker for blondes. One of them got back to me. She seems really nice. She might be a little big. But as Spinal Tap says, “The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin.” I’m totally drawing a blank on other women that were in the picture. I think they’re pretty much all gone. One punk girl was sorta hanging on, I told her let’s switch to e-mail, she sent me an e-mail, I replied, and that was it. Whatever.

I met with the guys from Red Tape Theatre. I had a suspicion that I would attend the meeting and walk away without really knowing what the duties of a board member actually entail, that suspicion was confirmed. I guess they meet quarterly, talk money, talk about the projects, talk about direction, that’s about it. I don’t think there really is a set list of duties for board members. The guys were really cool. It was fun to hear them talk about the theater because they had so much passion for it. It’s exciting. I love the theater. It is a love that kind of went dormant, but when I was in New York I saw a couple of shows and it reminded me of how much I like it. I am pretty sure I could be a board member if I choose to be. I think I’ll probably do it. I really feel like it’s something I should consider. I feel like it could open up some doors and teach me about myself. I also might get laid by dropping the fact that I’m on the Red Tape Theater board. It can’t hurt.

It was really weird yesterday. I wrote about an elephant in the room. Brendan from Bad Sandwich Chronicles used the same line in his blog. That’s fucked up. Usually people say there’s a gorilla in the room. I said elephant, he said elephant. Maybe people say elephant too and it’s not that weird. On the subject of the elephant. I was talking to my buddy Nick, the member of the ensemble who got me to consider becoming a board member. I was telling him about the practice last night, joking with him and laughing about the people. As I reflected on the moment and how people really like me, I realized that I’m pretty kick ass. If people don’t see that right away and want to be around that, then fuck em.

Speaking of the band. J/K, they’re cool. So I got there and I could hear them playing. I rang the doorbell and walked in. The dude was coming up to get the door and there I was in the dark. I scared the shit out of him. Nice first impression. He is a cool dude, we’ll call him Ken. Ken lives alone in a house about 2 minutes from my parents, perfect. It’s just him because he’s going through a divorce, the house is on the market. That’s going to be the practice spot. It’s really a quirky little house, cool though. I dunno what Ken’s deal is, but he’s got a BMW z4 in the garage. He said he was a high school teacher. He had shaggy hair and tattoos, I’m guessing he might have some trouble with the co-eds. The guys all came up and helped me bring my stuff down. I found a spot and set up. For our first song together, we decided to play Lucky man by the verve. I was nervous, I’m used to punk. I don’t know Lucky man well, the first time I heard it was like a week ago and maybe I’ve listened to it 4 times since then. We get going and I guess I was driving it a little hard. I guess I should’ve known by the fact that the singer couldn’t keep up. Finally one dude, we’ll call him Barney, stops it and starts getting on me (in a nice way) about the tempo, which I don’t like. I said I don’t know the song that well. He said, I can help you out. So he got this drum machine pedal going and it was totally annoying. I played along with it and thankfully we moved on to another song. Just Like Heaven. I’ve heard this song a million times, I know it, although I don’t have the crashes quite down yet. We played it and all the guys had boners. They thought we nailed it even though we didn’t. At least we didn’t have that damn click-track thing going. We never got that going again, which is good. Next we played Fake plastic trees. This is a good one cuz it starts slow and crescendos. It really lets us just jam, there’s no way to screw it up, it’s too simple. This song sounded good too and I think the guys were starting to realize that I can play. I wanted to play Where is my mind, they didn’t know it yet. We did play Just Like honey. That needs some work. We played a little of Pictures of you, that’s pretty easy and the drum is the same for the whole thing. I wish I had the little bells thing that is used in that song. I also wish I had the rattlesnake thing for Reptile, I might actually buy that. We also rocked I am the resurrection, Everyday is like Sunday, with or without you and a bastardized version of Sunday Bloody Sunday. It was really cool. The guys were cool. The guy that complained about the tempo, Barney. Barney is a little annoying. He talks about how he’s not good, which is rather pointless. We’re all good enough to play the songs. We don’t have to be much better. We’ll get better. Then Barney will be a total stickler about tempo and stuff. Weird. The other guy, Kyle (he looks like Kyle Gass a little), he’s probably the best musician, he also sings and does a pretty solid job of it. Kyle seemed cool and relaxed, then he came out with this gem, “My last band broke up because I was too much of a dick to everybody.” Not exactly the right thing to come out with at the first practice. We ended the jam and people started talking about what kind of band we wanted to be. Well I have a total vision for this band. We should be called 120 minutes. Have 3 1-hour sets of classic alternative tunes, and play at suburban bars. These guys seemed pretty adamant that they wanted to write some originals and eventually be all original. We’ll see how that goes.

At the end of the practice, the doorbell rings and someone comes in. It was definitely a woman, and she sounded young. The guys were packing up and I didn’t have to pack cuz I was just leaving everything. I go upstairs to see what’s up. Ken is talking to this girl (woman) that looked like a girl. She was short. She may have come from gymnastics practice. She had a jogging type bra on and some kind of bikini type bottoms and then gym shoes. She was ripped. She had to have been like 2% body fat. I almost got a boner just standing there. She was blonde, little, ripped, apparently a gymnast. Where do I sign up. I gotta do a match search for gymnastics. I’m guessing she was Ken’s girl. You go Ken!

I’m just about out of here. I have a short day today. Top secret. Then I’m off to ND tomorrow for the game. I’m pretty geeked about that. Although my dad informed me that we are leaving at 630 am tomorrow. I won’t even have time to work out. What can you do? Everybody have a good labor day weekend, and if you get a chance, rock out.