The Ins and Outs of the Universe

People are strange

2010-11-11T18:48:00.000-08:00

I really don’t have anything interesting to talk about. NO fun Vegas stories. No back shaving. No Beatles songs. My life is getting back to boring. Which means this blog is gonna suck. Sometimes though, sometimes the little things can be twisted and made into stories. I’m going to try to take some little things and twist them, like a titty.

This thing wasn’t so little. My d. No, actually I was riding the train yesterday and trying to study for the Series 4. I’m chillin, really trying to focus which was difficult. The train lurched. We were moving. Cool. Solo. I left my satchmo where it was by my feet, like usual. The seat was wide open. To my surprise, some dude sits down. Bummer. I should’ve blocked off the opportunity. I’m not a hermit. I don’t care if people sit next to me, in fact I keep the seat open on the off chance a hottie plops down next to me and we hit it off. That has never happened. Random dude sits down. He looks pretty normal. Casual dress, upscale, not unkempt. I think he had a north face jacket on. He looked like a potential Hindalean, I think he did get off in Hinsdale (thank God). The reason I thank God that this guy got off at the first stop, he had horrendous BO. Off the charts. As soon as he sat down I got a whiff, and almost barfed. Every time he shifted in his seat a cloud of crud smell wafted over to me and I couldn’t focus. I had to put the Series 4 stuff in my backpack, and pull out the newspaper. I sat there absolutely livid. Does this guy not have access to a shower? Deodorant? Proper hygiene? How could this seemingly upscale looking dude smell this bad? Tough day in the trading pit? Did he sprint 20 blocks? Forget the deode this morning? It was awful. Any person with a half a nut in their bag would’ve said, “Excuse me.” And politely moved to another section of the train, or jumped off while the train was going 40. I just sat there. I guess I’m a puss.

Speaking of oddness, I was waiting in line at Wendy’s two days ago and I think an insane asylum was on a field trip or something. There were two women in front of me, both seemed mentally challenged and both were morbidly obese. I couldn’t figure out what their deal was, but they ordered like 49 dollars worth of food. It took for-flipping-ever for their order to be taken. Which was tough for me…because I had an insane man behind me. No question he was insane, he was fidgeting, looked unkempt, had weird glasses on that were way dirty, and had greasy matted down hair. Textbook weirdo. This dude says to me, “Ex..Excuse me, do you hap happen to know what time it is?” I pulled out my iphone and said, “It’s 6:34.” He says, “Th Thank you. I g g guess there are still good people in the world.” Does that classify as good? Telling someone what time it is? I dunno? I just said, “I guess so.” I was gonna say something really kind like, “You’re a good person too.” I didn’t though. Sin of omission. So dude starts talking to me, as crazy people are often wont to do. He says, “I’m r really worried about my friend… She’s going to have surgery on her eyes.” I said, “I see.” I really didn’t. By the way, the guy didn’t stutter, it just makes for better theatre. I said, “Yeah. That’s scary.” He’s like, “Yeah. I’m very scared about it. I’m also very depressed right now.” It’s like, “Well you should probably keep that to yourself.” I think I said, “I’m sorry to hear that.” I wanted to say, “Waiting 15 minutes in line will do that to you, especially when there are only two people in front of you.” I get up there and I’m hungry but not crazy hungry. I ended up with a pretty solid order. I don’t like to waste a lot of money on food when I eat for free at work, so I got a jr bacon double cheeseburger and a small frosty. I also got a water. My total 2.15. Not too shabby. I took my winnings and went to an area that was fairly bright and highly populated. I did this because I figured that crazy guy would be least likely to follow me there. I was right. I ate in peace and I guess the people at Wendys know crazy guy cuz they were all nice to him and saying goodbye when he left. How nice.

Since I’m on the subject of crazy street people. I saw an awesome street person the other morning. I was walking up Wabash to work. It was chilly. Probably like 40 degrees. I spot this dude asleep on the sidewalk sorta half in the sidewalk, half jammed into an alcove type area. This guy has completely wrapped in a comfortable looking quilt. He was all nestled in. I was half tempted to crawl in there with him. Just kidding. I was kinda jealous though cuz I wished I was still in bed, even if bed was a sidewalk in Chicago. As I got closer I saw a McDonald’s cup perched next to him. It was a large (old large, now probably a small, you know the tall one.) It was filled to the brim. With amber colored acrid urine. Hrm. Hi there. I guess that works. Dude had it all right there. Some people have huge mansions, sleep in king size beds, walk a half mile to take a piss. Some people curl up with their comforter on the sidewalk and piss in a cup one foot away. Who is the crazy person?

Tomorrow is Friday. TGIF. Not much going on for me. No kiddies, I’ll probably practice my drums and study for the 4. I’m planning on taking the 4 next weds, that should be enough time. I should be able to pass it right now, but I have a suspicion that it would be close, and I don’t want to fail, so I’m going to study. I’m going to see the Methadones on Saturday night. It’s their last show. I’m pretty geeked. I hope they play all my favorite tunes. Although it would be awesome if they did something weird and only played Ramones Covers or something. We’ll see. Ciao.

Welcome to the hotel california

2010-11-09T19:40:00.000-08:00

Warning, this is a long one. It's about my trip to Las Vegas.

I’m definitely thinking about getting my back waxed. I just can’t decide how to do it. Not how to get it waxed, I’ve read up on it, and you just go to a salon and have it done. What I’m talking about is how to style it. Seriously, this is a difficult dilemma. I’d like to get all the hair taken off my shoulders, upper back and then when it gets down to above my butt, I’m a little stuck. It’s a slippery slope. If you go down below the waist, then you might as well just shave your legs too. If you stop above the waist, then you’ve got hair pants. Well sort of, cuz I don’t plan on waxing my front. If a woman doesn’t like chest and tummy hair, then I gotta move on. I mean what do women want now? Do they want like a pre-pubescent dude with no hair? I’m not going there. The leg hair is staying. The arm hair is staying. So when it comes to the lower back, I’m thinking that maybe I’ll leave a little hair there and let it sorta fade into my legs. I have no idea actually. I guess it’s trial and error. Or trial and Hair-er.

I really wanted to talk some about Vegas, but the memories are starting to fade. One thing that happened last week is I got divorced. I have been in the process of getting divorced for about 18 months. Long time. Well it all sort of blew up and we got it settled and hammered out without going to trial. That’s about all I can say. It’s done. It all got wrapped up around 330 last Wednesday and as luck would have it, I boarded a flight for Vegas at 540 that afternoon. It was really luck. Kind of an odd juxtaposition, but as I had just closed the casket on my marriage, I was cruising out to Vegas to help my parents celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. Not much interesting on the way out. I had the book The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo with me. I read for basically the whole flight. At one point, I was falling asleep, only I was in the middle seat. So I basically had to try to fall asleep sitting up. That doesn’t work. I would fall asleep and then my head would dip down and I’d wake back up. Did that for about a half hour and then gave up. Got to Vegas, made the fatal error of taking a shuttle out. So an hour later I get to my hotel. We were staying at the Wynn Encore. It was pretty darn posh. Very nice rooms. As soon as I got there I took a bath. They had a TV in the bathroom to watch when you take a bath. That’s kind of a pain in the ass. I don’t know I feel funny about touching the remote when I’m all wet, and I can’t leave the TV on any station for more than a few minutes. It ended up on ESPN, but I wasn’t really watching it. When I got out of the tub, I prolly should’ve just gone to bed, but instead, I went down to gamble. I didn’t have much money, so I was a little nervous. I sat down and played some blackjack.

I do know the basic strategy for blackjack, and if you don’t know the basic strategy, or parts of it, then you are what they call a sucker. And people will probably be pissed at you at the blackjack table if you screw things up. I personally think that it’s all pretty random as far as other players go. If a guy hits hard 14 against a 6, maybe he takes a bust card that would’ve busted the dealer, maybe he take a card that would’ve helped the dealer. Who knows. It is annoying though, because you don’t want to bust when the dealer is showing a bust card. So it’s a stupid move. When I play blackjack, I use a modified basic strategy. There are a bunch of tables that you have to memorize when it comes to doubling and splitting. I don’t remember them all. I know soft doubling is pretty key. You have a soft hand when you have an ace. When you have an ace, you can’t bust on one hit. So you can always hit or double down when you have an ace (depending on house rules). When the dealer is showing a bust card, 5 or 6, maybe 4 sometimes, you should double a soft 18 or lower. Soft doubling is probably the best advantage a player has against the house. High probability that the dealer will bust, you have a chance to double your bet, the odds are in your favor. So I’m pretty aggressive with soft doubling. Some people don’t know this, but you can always ask the dealer what the right play is. They usually know the right strategy. Do you split 2s vs a 4? Ask the dealer. So I played some blackjack. I just wanted to hang around for a while and break even. They did bring me free drinks, which I wasn’t sure if they were still doing. That’s one bonus to gambling, the free beer. Basically I sat there for about an hour, drank a beer, and made 100 bucks. Once I got up, I took off. I just can’t afford to give it back.

That was Wednesday. I cruised back to my room and slept. I got up the next day at like 6 cuz you can’t sleep in Vegas. I texted my Dad and we went to breakfast. We went somewhere in the Wynn and it was so dam good. I had this concoction pulled pork eggs benedict. It was eggs benedict over cornbread with pulled pork, bbq sauce, cheese, potatoes. It was so good. Great way to start the day. Then I went back to my room and got in bed. Got up and went to the health club. Got pumped up like hans and franz, then went to lunch. We all went to the Venetian for lunch. It was pretty cool. They had the gondolas outside, inside it was like Venice I guess. They had street performers doing acrobatic shit and juggling on stilts, singing, and making merry. It was pretty cool. They had a guy that was pretending to be a statue. I wasn’t sure if those guys were mimes or what. We were sitting at the table and we had a basket full of rolls. It’s Vegas, so I asked the group if they thought someone had ever thrown a roll at the statue guy. I said it has to have happened. The thoughts were mixed and people were trying to encourage me to do it. I wasn’t going to embarrass my ps the day before their anniversary, so I declined, I was tempted though. After we ate we got gelato, I went up and took a picture with the statue. I asked him if anyone had ever thrown something at him, he shook his head no. Dam mime. Thursday night as mentioned in a previous blog, I saw Love. It was really good. Then I came back and my whole fam was hanging out in the bar area so I had a beer with them. I got a fat tire and it was pretty good. I thought I didn’t like FT, I guess it’s ok. Next I made a fatal error. I sat down for blackjack. When in Vegas, you gotta do. The problem was that the table limit was raised to 25. The night before it was 15. At 25, I had to cash in 200 just to be able to hang (8 hands). Well I never really got up much, it was mostly a fight to get back to even. Until the dealer went on a run and cleaned me out. Back to the room dejected. I was really pissed. No question losing at Blackjack is a lower low than winning is a high. It doesn’t even out.

The next morning I got up and went back to the Blackjack table to get my money. My fam was going to breakfast. While we were waiting for everyone to get their stuff together, I played some blackjack. The limit was down to 10, so it was good for me. 100 is 10 hands. That’s better for basic strategy cuz BS evens out in the long run. Hence why table limits get raised. I sit down and some sad sap is getting beaten up. It’s just me and him. He was cool, he was in town for his 10th anniversary or something. Once I sat down, he started just killing em. Then he upped his bets and we both started winning. I walked away with 100 and I think he made like 1000. Rockin. So I got my money back. I’m back to scratch. We went to Dennys. Ate. I came back and worked out. I think I sat down and played some more blackjack. There’s a blackjack session that I can’t remember, but I’m pretty sure I made another 100 somewhere. The big plan for the day Friday was to go to the pool. They have a pool at the Wynn that allows for European sunbathing. Topless action. I was supposed to go hang out there with my brothers. They ended up bailing, and I went down there with my Ps. Kind of odd. Not bad though. Cuz they had a nice bar there, and my ps got me a fat tire, and we all sat around and chatted. Very nice. They got Pina coladas, and they were the worst PCs I have ever had, and I’m a fan (also like getting caught in the rain FYI). Friday was the warmest day, the day I figured peeps would be out. There were some hotties there, no boobies, I ended up cruising to another pool. I cruised and was pretty lit cuz I hadn’t eaten since Dennys and my ps didn’t do much damage on their PCs, they left them for me.

So I’m sitting there listening to my ipod and some dude starts talking to me. I have no idea what his name is, but he’s from New Jersey. He grew up in New York. The guys must’ve been 73 or so. This guy had a lot of stories. I guess he owned a liquor store and made a lot of money from it. Now he’s retired and traveling around the world. Cool. He definitely had some tall tales. He told me some story about the guy who came to date his daughter. The guy was a black belt (right). So the guy comes to the door and Jersey Guy says, “If you ever harm my daughter in any way I’m going to kick your ass.” Or something like that. Guy says, “I’ll drop you in 40 seconds.” Jersey says, “I’ll drop you in 30.” I guess the thing came to blows and Jersey says he dropped the guy in 10 seconds. Tall Tales. He also played semi pro baseball, and somebody offended him so he hit the guy with three pitches when he came to bat and put him in the hospital or something. Tall tales. Finally the guy left. He was ok. I got in the hot tub. It was full of weird dudes. They were from Australia or something. The problem with the hot tub is that it wasn’t hot. At this point it’s like 3 and starting to cool off. There was a cool breeze. Hot tub should be hot. Then all the aussies light up cigarettes. The hot tub became a smoke cloud. I bailed. I cruised back to the hotel room and got ready for dinner.

We had dinner at the clubhouse to the golf course which is basically a very nice restaurant. It was fun. We drank some wine. My sis in law had sent around a questionnaire for everyone to fill out to tell stories about my parents. Some really funny stuff came out and everyone had a good laugh. I got a tasting menu and I have to say the food was decidedly ok. Not as awesome as I had planned. I really wanted the gumbo, and that ended up being a disappointment. Then they had this sirloin that was tasty but a little rare for me. For dessert they had beignets or some French donut that’s basically a funnel cake. That was ok. The wine was good. I was feeling groovy. After dinner we all went to our rooms and I think everyone wanted to go to bed. Not happening in Vegas though. It was our last night. So we all went to see Kevin James and Ray Romano do stand up at the Mirage. It was pretty good. I thought their bits were funny. Some of their stuff was just ok, and had been beaten down. Ray Romano did a funny bit about ordering porn on the TV at his hotel. Another bit kind of related was about how legalized prostitution makes Vegas so great. Kevin James did a funny bit about people with walkers that have hand breaks and they’re all suped up. They both came out at the end and answered questions. That was kind of pointless. Kevin did one of Ray R’s bits, and he was doing a pretty funny impersonation of RR, and RR got all bent out of shape about it. They decided to do the bit together which was amazing that they both knew it well enough to do it remotely synchronized, although it was hard to follow and rather pointless. As is always the case, the opener was the best part of the show, he was some dude off of RR’s show and he was funny. If you asked the guy behind me, the dead air between jokes was funny. I had a hard time following some of the bits because the guy behind me thought that as soon as a comedian opened their mouth, it was time to laugh. He must’ve been doing whippits or something.

After the show it was like midnight which is 2pm in Chicago. It was time for everyone to go to bed. So we all went back to the hotel. Only I kept going. It’s Vegas Baby! Just down the strip from us was Circus Circus and The Riviera. If you don’t know the Riviera, it’s where they used to tape The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling show back in the day. A classic. I think I played some blackjack there with Nonotchka. So yeah, I head to the Riv. It was pretty dirty and filled with losers. They had some kind of serious cover band playing in this room in front of basically no one. Then there’s a bar outside of there which looks like it caters to ex convicts. The one thing they had which spoke to my proclivities was dancing girls by the blackjack tables. They had two girls pole dancing, scantily clad, while you sat down and played Blackjack. Good idea. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to play though, so I checked the ladies and then cruised to CC. Circus Circus was a total dive. I figured what the heck, so I sat down and played some blackjack. The chips were so old, that they were dirty, they had grime caked onto them and I grimaced every time I had to touch one. Def needed to wash hands after that. I sat down with some people who were like 19 and just engaged or just married. They had like 20 dollars to gamble with and I think they might have been mentally challenged. The girl hit a hard 17 or something against a dealer 6, I wanted to tackle her. At the Encore, when you hit hard 17, they need the pit bosses approval, which should tell you that it’s a bad idea. Some guys sat down that seriously looked shady, they were speaking another language and probably had ridden camels to school at some point in their lives. I got down and battled back to scratch, so I left. I was gonna go back to the Encore, but something about the Riv spoke to me. I stopped there and sat at the tables w/ female entertainment. That worked out pretty well. The people were pretty cool. They didn’t know what they were doing, so they thought I was Amarillo Slim or something. I kept getting blackjacks like I owned the place. I was tipping out pretty generously to the dancers, and to the dealer who was female and stacked. I still walked out of there with over a hundred. I think that put me up around 200 on the trip. I don’t think I’ve ever left Vegas with more money than I came with, so it was time to head home. On my way home I grabbed some of the complimentary literature on the street. Vegas has a nice system for sharing information, the research proved enlightening.

The next day I got up. Ate breakfast with the group. We went to this place the Pepper Mill. It looked like a good place to hang. They had like a speakeasy in back with fireplaces and plush seating. I think a lot of “deals” go down in there. Probably good people watching at night. We had flights to catch, so it was off to the airport and back to chitown. I can’t wait to head back to Vegas though, it’s always a good time.

Ello, I'm the Beatles.

2010-11-03T19:52:00.000-07:00

Geez dudes there’s so much to talk about. I could write like 10 pages. And I will. The problem is, although I have a ton to write about in my personal life, I’m going to write about The beatles. I don’t know what the beatles have to do with anything. How the fuck could beatles be a misspelled word? They are like the most famous band in the history of the world, can we please put them in the fucking dictionary so there’s no red line under Beatles in Microsoft word? Oh, I get it now, The Beatles are so fucking unbelievably transcendent, that they have to have the first letter capitalized or it would be misspelled. “Listen dipshit, we are talking about the biggest band ever, they changed the way people thought, the way people felt, the way people felt each other, fucking capitalize that shit, or you know what, it’s wrong.” That’s what Microsoft is telling me. Let’s see something, Microsoft, fucking Microsoft. If you try to type Microsoft with a lower case m, it automatically changes to capital, those smarmy bastards.

The Beatles. I was in Vegas last weekend. Completely different story. I saw one awesome show whilst I was there. Love. Cirque du Soleil. It was pretty awesome. Probably would’ve been better on mushrooms or something, but I was stone sober and it was still good. The thing about CDS is that it tells a story. The problem is that it tells a story in such an abstract way that unless you are a cryptographer, you really don’t know what’s going on. So basically trying to sit there and pick the story out of all the tricks and spectacular stunts etc; it’s a waste of time and energy. Like mushrooms (so I’ve heard) you’ve kinda just gotta sit back and let CDS happen to you. The visuals are unbelievable, the stunts are pretty awesome, and there are also some hot chicks thrown in there for a change of pace. I really don’t want to spoil it, but the stunts are the best part. There are some people in this world with some really tripped-out talents. People who do trapeze like stuff but with things other than trapezes. It’s really hard to explain. The whole thing was set to Beatles music and the choices were pretty solid. It was also cool that they used obscure versions of most of the tunes, so it wasn’t the version that was beaten to death, it was the one-off they did in John’s studio when they were on acid or something. So anyway, they played my favorite Beatles song. I have to come forward and openly admit that I’m not a Beatles fan. I appreciate their music. I hear their influence, especially in the indie stuff out today. I do have a favorite Beatles song. Amazingly, this song got voted as the best Beatles song recently. I think this was a new poll, because Hey Jude was always up there and I forget what else is usually on top. But in this new poll, and to me, the best Beatles song is…A Day in The Life.

So on Sunday, I’m back from Vegas. I’m driving over to pick up my daughter to take her to rehearsal. I turn on WXRT, and they are doing Beatles breakfast or whatever with Terry Hemmert. And what do you know, they play A Day in The Life. I start thinking about the first time I heard the song. I totally remember where I was when I first heard that song. The song ends and Terry comes on and she says, “Can you remember where you were when you first heard that song?” I was like, “TERRY! I CAN TOTALLY REMEMBER!” I didn’t shout though. When I was in 4th grade, or between third and fourth grade, I went to camp. This was no ordinary camp. It was weight watchers camp. Kind of a funny story about how I ended up at weight watchers camp, other than that I was fat, cuz I was. Although this may sound odd, my dad used to take a lot of baths. That’s not odd. When I would come home, I would talk to him while he was in the bath tub. Kinda weird. One day, I’m feeling a little bummed about being fat, and I didn’t want to take responsibility for my situation, cuz I’m a kid, so I wanted to blame somebody else. So I said to my dad, “Dad…Why did you let me get fat?” I think as a dad, this is the equivalent of a kick to the nuts. I think he was bummed, he knew I was in a situation that I didn’t want to be in, and I blamed him and my mom. So that Summer, I went to fat camp. It was a weight watchers camp, and it was located in Wisconsin near Sheboygan at Lakeland College. Pretty cool campus. I remember “Old Main.” I think that was where we lived, it was supposedly haunted.

So I’m at Fat Camp, and I have the lamest roommates ever. I couldn’t wait to get out of that room. I think my roomie had to sleep with the door open and the light on. I had to get out of there. There were a couple of guys down the hall, one of them was really fat, I think he had like candy bars and stuff stashed like a junkie in prison. I moved in with him, he was funny and the other guy was funny, but I think I was sleeping on a mattress on the floor, which sucked. The coolest guys were across the hall, everyone respected them for some reason. They were cool, nice guys, Josh and Sol. After a while, they invited me to room with them, I guess cuz I’m a cool guy. Or maybe it was because I was into D and D at the time and liked to paint the little metal figures and people thought that was cool. I don’t know, that was a sidebar. Josh was cool, laid back, Sol, he was hot and cold. Josh really liked the Beatles, a lot. I can’t remember if I was even into music in 3rd grade, if I was, it was The who, Dire Straits, Blondie, BTO, and roller skating music (J Geils Band?). Josh had the Beatles pumping 24/7 and at an early age, the Beatles didn’t really do it for me. There was one song that came on and I was like, “Heyyyy…What is this?” It was A Day in the Life. That’s a fricking song. That song speaks to me. I feel like the guy in the song. That song is so kick ass, you would think it was recorded at Apple Studios on $10,000 equipment (in 1965). It was recorded on a 4 track. That’s what Terry Hemmert said, and I’m kind of skeptical now because there are some elaborate string parts in it. Maybe the backbone and vocals were recorded on a 4 track. The song is a little quirky too, like it almost sounds like they took 2 different songs and mashed them together. It’s still my favorite Beatles tune. A close second and also first heard at Lakeland college in Old Main courtesy of Mr. Josh Saffren, Maxwell’s silver hammer.

That’s it. I’ll be back with tales of debauchery from Las Vegas.

Old Canes

2010-10-18T19:42:00.001-07:00

I feel really sorry for the 400 people who could have come to see Old Canes at the Mayne Stage but chose to do something else. That is my guess, that about 400 more people could have fit in there. After the show I approached the lead singer, Chris Crisci, and said, “Thanks man.” He said, “You’re welcome.” I went on, “I saw Neutral Milk Hotel open for Superchunk at the Lounge Ax over on Lincoln. That was a life-changing experience. I would put this show in that category. I really like the Appleseed stuff, and I love the old canes stuff. Keep it coming.” He replied, “I will.” He raised his glass to click with mine and that was it. I don’t know how to describe Old Canes stuff. It’s kind of rollicking. It’s kind of folky. It reminds me of Neutral Milk Hotel a little bit, but it’s more upbeat. It’s all acoustic, but it does rock at times. It’s like going on a hayride. Well a good hayride. I’ve been on the lame hayrides with my kids. You ride out into the pumpkin patch and it’s all dusty, you look at some pumpkins and they don’t look as nice as the ones all the way back at the Pumpkin Fest, and you also don’t have to lug them all the way back to where the other pumpkins are, so you just walk around and watch other idiots trying to lug pumpkins back onto the cart.

A good hayride would happen on a Friday night. Late fall, crisp weather, maybe a jacket required or a thick flannel shirt. You wouldn’t be with your kids, you’d be with your friends, and the girl you were digging on would be there. You’d split a sixer with your friends before the ride and when you got there you’d have a nice buzz going… Everyone is milling about, laughing. Some guy yells, “Hot cider! Get your hot cider.” Johnny comes back with 4 ciders and Fred pulls out a flask of whiskey. The amber liquid nicely tops off each cider and the four of you toast as the moon peeks out from behind some clouds. Jenny walks up, “Whatcha drinkin?” “Cider, you want some.” She takes the cup from your hands and puts it to her lips as her eyes gaze into yours. Everyone is a little tipsy as they load into the haycart. The moon is the only source of light as the cart careens through the forest. Jenny is giving you the eye from across the cart as she makes small talk with her friends. You sit there sipping your cider and getting warm from the inside. A glow appears in the distance. It grows as the cart comes through the forest to a clearing. There’s a bonfire and bales of hay are strewn about for everyone to sit on. There’s a shed out there and people are coming and going from it. The cart stops. Everyone unloads and takes a seat around the fire. Fred taps you in the gut with his flask. You take it, pop the cap and take a healthy gulp. Two men emerge from the shed. One has a guitar, the other a fiddle. They bust into some raucous foot stompin folk and every toe commences to a-tappin. People start to dance. You seize the opportunity to make your move on Jenny. “Would you like to dance?” “You bet sailor.” It’s not graceful, and you’re tipsy, but the two of you are touching and moving and the music is intoxicating. You both take a rest, and time stops as Jenny lays on your shoulder looking up at the sky. You hold her there and just exist. All good things must come to an end. You all pile back on the cart and head home. The only difference is that this time Jenny is sitting next to you and you’re holding hands.

So I hope that gave you a good impression of what Old Canes is all about. They’re basically a rollicking good time. The Mayne Stage is damn fine venue as well. Number one key element? An awesome beer list. If you’ve been to Lincoln hall, the setup is similar. You walk in, make your way to the back, they’ve got the bar there. Then you go through the doors to get into the space. It’s a wide open two story space that is sort of long like the shape of the key on a basketball court. It’s pretty dark, not the best for photography. Everything is brand new and totally posh. Bench style booth seating lines each side of the hall and then there are steps down to the main floor where cocktail tables are set up. There’s a little space in front of the stage for dancing. During the first act The Thin Man, I totally wished I had somebody there to dance with. I would’ve danced with my buddy Pizza, but I’m sure he would’ve wanted to lead. The Thin Man were really good. They had a pretty charismatic singer, a tall guy that looked like Kramer from Seinfeld. He played guitar and accordion. The music was honky tonkish. I liked it. Next to Old Canes, I liked them the best. Back to the venue. So the back of the main floor has a sort of VIP area. These are booths that are raised in tiers so you can sit back there, drink Courvoisier and watch the music. There was nobody back there. Tix for this thing were $10. Three solid bands. A really jamming new venue. There were maybe 100 people there. Has the whole world become somnambulant? Whatever. I can’t hassle it, I don’t like big crowds anyway. Although it would be nice for Old Canes to get some notoriety and make some money. I think I read somewhere that Chris had to sell a guitar cuz he was low on funds, that’s bull.

I was quite happy for the entire show in my booth spot along the side wall. I really liked the sound from there and wasn’t sure if it would improve anywhere else. When Old Canes came out. They started with Taxi on Fremont, which is my favorite song from them. I moved to the main floor assuming it would be better. It wasn’t. The sound was harsher and just plain not as good. So I moved back. After the show I was talking with Rusty, a multi-instrumentalist in Old Canes, kid looked like he was maybe 25, full head of crazy hair, played the upright bass with bow and plucking, played a few other instruments, now he’s on tour. Lucky bastard. I was explaining the sound phenomenon to Rusty and he replied, “That’s weird.” Good talk rus. I never made it up into the balcony. I did get a good sampling of the beer menu. I started with a Cane and Ebel, it was so darn good. Best brew of the night. Next I really wanted a Metropolitan Copper, but they didn’t have it. I went with a Metro Lager and it was a regular beer. Not bad though. Next I went off the map with an Old Rasputin Russian Imperial Stout. That was nice. Something different. Sippable. My final brew was a Founders Dirty Bastard. It was a Scottish Ale and they pack quite a whallop. Tasty. Although I only had 4 beers, I woke up the next day and felt like crap, that’s the joy of micro brew mixing, sometimes you end up with the perfect concoction for a hangover. It wasn’t bad though. I managed to shake it off by lying in front of the tv watching the bears suck.

Call it what you will

2010-10-16T12:19:00.000-07:00

You know what I love about missing the 1040pm train by 10 seconds? You only have to wait an hour for the next one. Last night, that happened to me for the 2nd time in two weeks. Seriously, Metra should give you like a 1 minute grace period to make the train. No official announcement, no hoopla, just they leave a minute late for every train after 8pm. For you naysayers out there, this is not a “But this one goes to 11 scenario.” “It’s a my cabbie sucked,” “I got held up by foot traffic,” “I had to do that last shot” type of thing. I almost said this is a utilitarian change, but it’s more of a common sense change. From a utilitarian perspective, the train should leave on time, because that is the right thing for the largest group of people (those already on the train). I would disagree though, I think the hardship caused to those who barely miss the train is much greater than the collective loss of 1 minute to the whole group. It was me and another dude sprinting for the train. We got there. The train was there. The doors were closed, and it pulled out of the station. J This morning I sent the following e-mail to Metra:

Missing a train by 10 seconds at 1040 at night forces you to wait an hour for the next train. It's brutal and it has happened to me twice in the last week. Can you please keep the trains open until 1041? I don't think the people on the train will feel inconvenienced for the extra minute, and the people who would now just make the train will be overjoyed. You don't need to announce it, just make it an unwritten rule that there is a 1 minute grace period for trains leaving after 8 pm. Thanks.

You might say, “What about the people that get there at 10:41:10 and just miss the train?” I would answer, “It’s not a 1041 train, it’s a 1040 train,” Therefore people who get there at 1041 already know they missed it. If you pop into the station at 1040:30, you know you’re hosed, you might as well grab a beer. But when you are sprinting through the station at 10:39:41, they should cut you some slack.

I was talking with my bro today on the way to work and I hit him with an analogy that went something like this. Remember when you were a kid and you saw a toy on TV and you just wanted it so bad? For me it was Shogun Warriors. Shogun Warriors were these 2 foot tall robots that you could make fight. The commercial made it look like they could shoot things 20 feet and make the other Warrior fall apart; the typical hyped-up visuals that totally misrepresented what the toy did. I don’t think that’s legal anymore. When I was a kid, I really wanted all the Shogun Warriors. I’d go to Toys R Us and look at them in the awesome packaging, all the weapons inside the clear plastic, stuff that looked like hours of fun. I begged my parents for the Shogun Warriors. Finally Christmas came and all I asked for was all 4 Shogun Warriors. On Christmas day I ran down and opened my presents, and sure enough, all 4 Shogun Warriors were there. I ripped open the beautiful packaging knowing that the contents would far exceed the promises made on the box. I put the stickers on and got them all ready. Then I went to roll one (it had wheels on its feet), it didn’t roll. One of them wouldn’t stand up. The other one that was supposed to shoot stars 20 feet only shot them like 2. The hand on one shot off and got lost under the couch. The whole thing was a big let down, it just didn’t measure up to the expectations that I had created in my own mind. The toys looked awesome on TV, the packaging was beautiful and exciting, but the contents were worthless.

I was reading today about Inez Sainz being in Playboy. She got offered a photo spread and turned it down. When I was a kid, I wanted everyone to be in Playboy. It’s like Farrah Fawcett, “When’s she gonna be in Playboy?” Anyone with a modicum of celebrity, and an awesome face/body, it was like “When is she gonna be in Playboy?” Not much changes. Tiger’s Mistress, the woman who brought down Spitzer, some woman in the military, you name it, people want to see them nude. Same with this woman who had the locker room issue. She’s hot, and I’d love to see her naked, but it’s just a weird concept. Oh, you got messed with in a locker room? You’re hot? Let’s see you nude. “Oh well, I’m nationally recognized now, and basically all people want is to see me naked, Playboy offered me a lot of money, I guess I’ll do it.” I know it makes sense to cash in and I would never begrudge a person the opportunity to take their fleeting celebrity to the bank, but I guess there is a self respect issue and a general idiocy of the whole idea issue. The only reason anyone cares about the whole debacle is because Inez is hot. The only payoff anyone really wants is to see her naked. I don’t think I’m doing a good job expressing the oddness inherent in this thing. I gotta ruminate on it, while I glance through a playboy.

Riot Fizzle

2010-10-13T19:05:00.000-07:00

Geez life is a roller coaster sometimes. Either that, or my brain just makes it into one. I’m feeling an unbelievable amount better, which is nice. It was really weird yesterday. For those that don’t know. OG dumped me a second time. On Friday. Before Riot Fest. Sorta dampened the mood at Riot fest and for the rest of the weekend. I started coming out of the funk yesterday. After work, on my walk to the train I felt pretty energized and amped. Then on the train I had a feeling of euphoria that maybe I’ve never experienced. It was really, really, weird. I wasn’t going to hassle it. I think my body was just saying, you’re all out of the negative stuff, we gotta burn some positive. I felt like a trillion suns. I don’t know how to describe it. I had also just submitted a giant project at work that has been sorta meandering along for 10 months. That probably helped a bit. I didn’t feel like going out like a punk bitch, so I asked OG if I could talk to her. We scheduled it for last night. A lot of people told me that I didn’t have anything to gain by talking to her, but like I said, I ain’t going out like that. I called her and eventually we got to talking. She had to go for work, but said she’d call me back. She did call me back and I just basically wanted to say my piece and move on. I said what I had to say. Then we both just started blabbing and 2 hours later I dunno what is going on. So that’s that.

This morning I was still feeling pretty good. I got off the train and was geeked for my walk into work. I like the cooler weather and the decrease in foot traffic. As I exited the train station, I saw my man that gives out the red eye newspaper. He’s a funny dude. He jaws at everybody and sometimes I say hey or something extra which he seems to dig. So when he gave me my red eye I said, “Good Morning, thanks.” And he shouts out, “Morning Hometeam, are you still playin?!” I said, “Yep!” Pretty sweet. The girl walking next to me looked at me like I was nuts tho.

Well this year’s Riot Fest and Last Year’s are really a study in contrasts. The big problem with this year is that there weren’t as many great bands. Much to my good fortune, all the bands I wanted to see were playing Congress on Friday. Bad Religion being the big one. I hope you guys read the Bad Sandwich Chronicles yesterday about Greg Graffin from BR, a punk diva, that’s hilarious. “No Boots, No show.” I love that stuff. Who would’ve known. I don’t want to go into the whole sordid story of what happened before the show, but I got dumped, that’s all you need to know. I turned to my stalwart, someone I knew would come through. Someone affectionately known as Nomis. I called nomer and asked if he could come to the show, that I had an extra tick. Well his wife was out, he had the kids, etc., but he pulled it off. So Nomer was in, I wouldn’t be alone, but Off with their heads was coming on at 630, so I had to get there. I cruised straight to the Congress. Parked on the street and went in. The place was only like .3 full when I got there, a sparse crowd. I wasn’t sure if it was gonna be an off year or what. I did not see anyone that I recognized from the previous year. There were a lot of sweet punks though, liberty spikes, Mohawks, mullets, the whole nine yards. Lotta kids too. Lotta parents with kids. The typical mishmash of people. I go over and check out the merch and there is only one thing that I want to buy. I don’t have any money, but there was an off with their heads hoodie that was beyond words. Try as I might, I can’t find a pic of it. I go in and check out this band the X is for Eyes. They weren’t bad. Typical Chicago type punk.

I have to mention that during X is, my buddy called me up and that was way cool. I sent out word that I got dumped and he rang me up. I’m at a punk show, alone, post dumpage, that really lifted me up. I grabbed a piece of pizza for dinner. It was nasty. Then I went back in for OWTH. At this point I’m like screw it, I’m getting a beer. Which I did. Then I went right up front for OWTH. They are awesome, not quite as amazing as when my buddy and I heard them at Liar’s club last year, but I’ll def check them anytime they are in town. The bouncing souls were next. I figured might as well hang in the balcony for that one. They played, they were good. Typical Socal type of stuff. You can tell when they play their classics, and they were good. I’ll def check them out on emusic and maybe DL some of their stuff. After TBS, I noticed that they were selling high life cans upstairs. Score (they weren’t selling them downstairs and I had to drink a stella). HL cans were 5 bucks I think a 16 oz stella was 8, by my math the Stella is a hosejob. Next was The Circle Jerks. Keith Morris, the lead singer of the Circle Jerks, was the original singer of Black Flag. I’m guessing he wrote wasted cuz TCJ played it and put it on an album. They played all their favorites: Wild in the streets, Wasted, World up my ass, Deny Everything, some other stuff. I have to say, for like a 50 year old dude KM could still bring it. He could sing the songs just as snarly, just as fast, it was awesome. I’d def catch TCJ if they come back to town.

Two bands left. Local Heroes The Lawrence Arms were up next. It seemed like there were a lot of people really amped to catch TLA. The kids were up. TLA came out and Brendan (author of BSC) really has an everyman approach which I think fans find accessible, it’s endearing and it really makes you root for them. It’s really hard for me to be up on their whole catalog, but most of the kids around me knew the words to every song. They didn’t play abracadaver, which is one of my faves, but they played Turnstiles, 100 Resolutions (awesome song), and Ramblin boys of Pleasure where the whole crowd was shouting along “Things have changed, things have changed forever…we’re the rambling boys of pleasure.” Sometime in there nomis showed up. I got him his tick, he came in, we embraced, grabbed beers. He brought earplugs, which were a welcome addition, then we cruised down and caught the end of TLA.

I forget what we talked about between TLA and Bad Religion, but the sets turned over quick and I guess they found Greg Graffin’s boots cuz Bad Religion came right out. GG looked awesome, just like it was described in BSC, he had some kind of Fred Perry golf shirt on, black pants, a beer gut, bald head, he looked like he would be at home in a dingy old golf clubhouse as much as in front of the world’s best punk rock band. I guess BR are celebrating their 30th anniversary. Pretty huge. They played for probably an hour and brought it with such hits as: I want to conquer the world, no control, 20th century digital boy, infected, We’re only gonna die, Atomic Garden, Generator, and many more. It kicked ass. Nomis seemed to enjoy himself. After the dust settled I noted that Off With Their Heads were going to be playing at Exit at midnight. He said, “Didn’t you just see them?” To which I replied, “yes.” He had to go to a dentist appointment at 8am, and as a little gift to the hygienist, we decided to grab some burritos right by the Congress. Surprisingly, there were only like 10 people in the place, everyone else probably went to the next spot. We grabbed some grub, talked about the old times, it was way cool. Then we parted ways.

Appletown

2010-09-21T14:41:00.000-07:00

It’s weird how things work out. Last night I was way jonesin to send Old Girl a text. I was just gonna check in and say hey. I am curious if she is going to see the National or not. I’m kinda thinking it was wasteful to trash the connection, even if it only turned out to be friends or whatever. It was good to think about it and put it into perspective for the future. It’s just tough to work new friends into the picture. I’m sure if we decided to be friends the outcome would be the same, I’d never hear from her again. On the Nat tix tip, I sold the tix for $200. I feel a smidge guilty about it, cuz I’ve seen people trying to sell them for $45/each since then. Cha-ching. Nothing like a good scalp to get your blood pumping. I also need to give some money to the theater, so I’m hoping to have some of the 200 left over for that. Yeah, I don’t have the tix anymore, so I felt like there was less riding on the text. I dunno, at the end of the day, she’s not interested and I shouldn’t be. I think I’m slowly coming to that conclusion. Very slowly, I know. So last night I’m dead tired from the weekend, I wasn’t thinking about contacting old girl, I just went online to check my e-mail. I check e-mail and I get a message from this new girl I’m digging. That was cool. So I got on OKC to read the message and I get an instant message from some other girl. I’m just like WTF. While I’m IMing with this girl, I’m also responding to new girl. Then I get an IM on Yahoo and it’s the punk girl. I think someone was trying to send me a message, “why fret over what is gone, when there is so much here.” Seriously too, I’m not even trying. I send, at most, 5 e-mails a week, I’m sure there are guys that send 50 a week. It was cool though. Old girl and I did not have a lot in common. The new girl I’m e-mailing with is really into music. She is a photographer for Spin magazine. From what I can tell from her pictures, she is absolutely gorgeous too. Always good. I dunno what’s up with the other girls, the new IM girl didn’t have a picture on her profile, def a red flag.

I just want to make a quick comparison between Punk Girl and Old Girl, Punk Girl has tracked me down a few times and asked what’s up (kinda like what I did to OG). She’s shown that she’s interested. I’m not asking for the world, I just did not get the vibe from OG, in fact the vibe I did get was “I won’t mind if you just go away.”

In my quest to blow all the money I made on the National tix and not give it to the Theater, I am going to see Roger Waters tonight. I’m containing my expectations, although part of me def thinks it’s gonna be off the heezle. There should be a nutty light show and they should build a wall and break it down. I dunno, mass hysteria. If the show was unhooked back in 1980, it should be a mindblowing event in 2010. We can do so much more with less now than we could then. We have lasers, phasers, snuggies, robots, flowbees, and cgi. I’m expecting Jar Jar Binks to appear on the stage 20 feet high and walk off into the crowd. Or something like that. Getting the tix was no mean feat. I had to deal with Leroy from Dekalb. Dude seemed like an ok guy. Then he called me at midnight last night. “You gave me a bum address.” “No I didn’t, that’s what my buddy told me and he’s been living there for 11 years. Are you on Ohio?” “No.” “The place is on Ohio.” Whateves. I am working on minimal sleep though, which sucks. I guess tomorrow night I’ll get 7 hours. That would be wonderful. The tix were a bargain though. Well below face. I think face w/ fees was like $70, we got our tix for $45/each. Good times. Not a bad swap, Roger Waters performing the Wall, for The National. I’d do that any day, I might not feel the same way tomorrow, but I’m pretty sure I will.

That was a bummer that the guy on the Broncos killed himself. It’s crazy. I don’t know if people just have mental problems, or what, but suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Life is tough though. It’s more than some people can handle. I don’t know what was going on in this guy’s life, but he must’ve felt pretty hopeless. I think I’ve gone off on this topic before so I don’t feel like rehashing stuff I already said. Life is tough though. It’s more than some people can handle.

In Through the Out Door

2010-09-21T14:40:00.000-07:00

Good weekend. Good times. Well Friday was pretty chill. I had plans to go out on Saturday and watch the ND game with my bud, so I didn’t mind staying in on Friday. I went to the Sox game on Thurs, so I was pretty beat as I got like 4 hours of sleep on Thurs night. Just chilling on Friday also set me up to hit the Y on Saturday and get a proper work out in. I was pretty amped for my workout, maybe a little too amped. I did some bench, which was fun. The Y has a ton of different machines and I was really looking forward to hitting the arm curl machine. I get on there and I start pumping out reps. I feel pretty good and this machine really isolates your biceps, so you totally feel the burn. I get to my third set and I’m grinding out the reps (jeez do I sound like a meathead) and I sorta bob my head forward for momentum and I jacked myself in the head with the metal bar. I have to admit I kinda knocked myself silly. That was not fun. I shook it off and the adrenaline from working out made me not notice it, but that night I sorta had a weird headache. The headache went away after a few beers, then on Sunday it really hurt and felt weird and felt like it was radiating to the back of my head. I figured it was just a blood vessel that popped in my head and the blood was just pooling up in the back of my skull, no big deal. Still I was kind of out of it.

I think this blog is gonna jump around a bit. I’ll keep you guessing. I did want to talk about the idea of macking on women at all opportunities. I read something about it, and the guy laid out a pretty solid plan for getting to the point where you can pick up women everywhere. The problem with the plan is that it’s a long process and involves doing things that I don’t like to do. Namely, talking to strangers. Mom always said, “Don’t talk to strangers.” Well this guy has a plan and step one is to start talking to strangers, get good at gabbing with people. Talk to the old lady on the street, the guy at the supermarket, any random person you meet. I hate doing this. I hate small talk almost with a passion. I think the next step, once you get pretty comfortable talking to people, to start talking to women. I think he said to choose women that you’re not really attracted to so you aren’t nervous, just get used to talking to women. I dunno, eventually you work your way up to being crazy social and talking to hot women without a hint of fear. The plan just won’t work for me. Case and point. My buddy and I were out yesterday at Timothy O’tooles watching the bears game. We got sat down with these old biddies from Dallas. They were rooting for the Cowboys while we were rooting for the Bears. As soon as I saw these people I was thinking, “I’m not going to say a word to them.” Well my buddy must’ve taken his gregarious pills, cuz before he even sits down he says, “I bet you’re all wondering why I called this meeting.” Great line, it cracked me up. Then for the rest of the time he was putting the serious charm on these ladies. They were eating out of his hand. It was a classic example of something that I could do, but choose not to. I am actually rather adverse to that kind of kibitzing. I tried to throw some lines in there and at one point a woman said, “I like you guys, you’re funny.” To which I replied, “we also have giant penises.” Actually I didn’t. But I wish I would have. My head was hurting though and I was thinking that I might have a head injury.

Stepping in to the wayback machine, we go to Saturday night. Well Saturday night turned out to be rather strange. My aforementioned bud and I went out to Victory liquors to watch the ND game. We got there after the game had started and it was pretty packed. We decided to head to the back of the bar, which was even more packed. After standing there for a moment, my buddy says, “hey, is that Sheila (his old girlfriend).” I look up and she is looking at us. I know her, so I wave. She comes over. Hugs us. All that. A little awkward. She went back to her friends, and we basically just stood in the same spot and watched the game. It was fun, although the game took way too long, and ND ended up losing in heart-wrenching fashion. After the game, we said goodbye to Sheila, and hit the road. I really wanted to go to Metro to see Titus Andronicus. My bud was sorta shellshocked, so we made our way up to metro. Well we hit some stupid traffic and I’m like, “Is there a Cubs game tonight?” There were people everywhere on Clark Street; it was like fucking Mardi Gras. It def was not normal for a Saturday night with no Cubs game. We get up to Wrigley after like a half hour and it dawns on me. Dave Matthews band is playing. What a pain in the ass. As if I need another reason to hate DMB, they fucking cockblocked me when I was trying to see TA. Total bullshit. By the time we got up to Metro it was 1130. TA had to be on, I hadn’t parked, we didn’t have tickets. There was nowhere to park because the DMB idiots were all over the place. What to do… What to do.

I wanted to hear some good music. Two places came to mind. Delilah’s or Exit. We headed to Delilah’s. D’s plays good music and have a good beer selection. We drove by and it seemed a little crowded. I think it seemed crowded cuz there were tons of people milling about out front. Those people were probably smoking. It might not have been bad there. We cruised to exit anyway. Exit was pretty empty when we got there. A couple of seats at the bar were calling out to us. We sat down, grabbed a couple of beers and chilled. They were playing Aliens on the TVs, great movie. Alien is one of my favorite movies of all time, Aliens is pretty solid too. I get around to listening for the tunes, I’m noticing a trend. All female singers. I’m just like what is up? I like female singers, in fact a band I’m really digging right now, Camera Obscura has a female singer, but it gets old. Especially when it’s punk women screaming. I did hear a song that I love that I hadn’t heard in a while, Pretend we’re dead by L7. Classic. Other than that though, it was getting old. I asked the bartender what was up and she said, “It’s all angry lesbian music because we have an angry lesbian DJ.” So I went to talk to the DJ. I said, do you have Iggy and the Stooges? She was like no. That was that. Safe to say the music kinda sucked and it contributed to us bailing early.

One cool thing, well Exit always has weird stuff, and sometimes there’s something new or stupid or just tripped out. This time they had an Arcade-Style punching machine. The way the thing worked was, you put your quarter in and the punching bag drops down. It’s basically a large speedbag attached to a pole. You punch it as hard as you can and it flies back into the machine and it measures your power. The high score on the machine was 942. I have to say it was rather entertaining sitting there, drinking beer, and watching people play this game. There was one dude, who was kind of a punching machine hustler. He talked some old fat dude into taking him on. Well the young guy pops the thing and he got like an 800. Then old dude gets up there, he barely made square contact with the bag, he got like 400. Then old guy hands young guy a $5. Hustled. You would think fool me once shame on you, but this old man came back for more. Young guy blasted out like an 850, then old dude put up a pitiful 300, I think I could’ve sneezed on the thing and gotten better. I shouldn’t talk though. I didn’t play it cuz I def think it would mess up my already messed-up wrist. No use tempting fate with that one, discretion is the better part of valor. At one point, a really big dude comes in and he steps up to the machine. This guy looks like he knows what he’s doing. The dude squares up, rears back, and just hammers the machine, I said to my buddy, “That’s a new record, no question.” The whole machine was shaking as the meter counted up the power, 600, 700, 800, 900…918. Dude got robbed. That would’ve been over 1000, some of the power was lost because the machine was swaying all over the place. They need to put some spacers in back to keep it from rocking around. Oh well, you can’t beat fun at the old exit.

How to pick up water

2010-09-17T16:16:00.000-07:00

I think I might be a water weirdo. I like my water to be very very cold. I hate drinking warm or especially lukewarm water. At work, I was forced to get resourceful to make sure I have a solid supply of very cold water. I used to just take my chances and head to the kitchen and take what I got. Sometimes the water would be like 38 degrees, other times it was in various stages of coolness approaching 38 degrees (which is the temperature the fridge is set to.) Then I took a class in one of the conference rooms that is like 15 feet away from where I sit. The kitchen is like 100 feet. Don’t get me started about the auxiliary kitchen, the water there is never cold and half the time some idiot leaves the fridge open so nothing in there is cold. Back to the conference rooms, there are refrigerators in them, with water. They are all set to 37 degrees, one might be set to 34. The water in there is always cold cuz it just sits there til someone in a meeting gets thirsty. The conference rooms have become my personal water stash. It’s awesome. The water in there is always perfect. Well lately the rooms have been occupied. The class that I spoke at yesterday is taking one, and that forces everyone else to use the other. It’s a major buzz kill and I basically go to the aux kitchen, which is a waste of time, the water is always warm, and then I bail to the other kitchen and do the best I can. Well today, I had a water from yesterday on my desk, unopened. So I went to return it for a cold one. The conference rooms were taken, so I had to go to the aux kitchen. I swapped out my water for one that was really only moderately colder. This water sat around for a few minutes and I noticed that the students went on a field trip, so I went and swapped my water out for one in the conference room. A double water swap. That’s why I’m water weird.

I was reading today that the woman who said she got acid dumped on her was lying. It was a hoax. All this crazy stuff all over the place, it really jades you out. When I read that it was a hoax, I was like “oh yeah, the acid lady.” But honestly when I saw the headline originally that the woman got acid dumped on her face, I didn’t read the article. I really didn’t give a shit. I looked at the picture of her before the acid and I thought, “kinda cute, bummer that she’s acid-scarred now.” That was about it.

I saw a woman today with a really awesome giant ass. It totally got me singin big bottom to myself. This woman was the textbook definition of curvy. She had ok boobs, should’ve been bigger to complete the hourglass, but she did not have a big waist. Just a really round ass, and decent boobs. To me, this is curvy. I saw some other women who were curvy. Curvy can also mean really big boobs and a little fat. Curvy does not mean obese. I think it’s a way for an obese woman to try to hide the fact that she’s really a house. An obese woman should put a few extra pounds, or another one that I saw recently, overweight. It’s like you put overweight and you are pretty much just letting it out there that you’re huge. Which is good. Nothing worse than the bait and switch. I’m kinda bumming that I didn’t approach the curvy girl. I think more than online dating, or church, school, coffee houses, bars, I think the place to get a girl is everywhere. You see a girl, you should just approach her and try to say hi. If she’s taken or not interested, she’ll shut you down pretty quick, but if she’s interested, she’ll probably talk with you and be receptive when you ask for her number or e-mail or whatever. I really need to get up on the whole communication thing, cuz I’m thinking women are more cautious today than they used to be. You used to get their number, but now I don’t think it’s wise to give out your number. They probably use something else, like IM probably. They prolly say, IM me on yahoo, I really have no idea, but I should find out.

Back to the idea of picking up women everywhere, I just had a mini revelation. I’ve written in the past about roses born to bloom unseen. I think this basically means women who aren’t really out there, they probably want to meet a guy, but they’re not online, they don’t go to bars, they might get macked on at work, but that’s it. These women don’t have a lot of competition for them. It’s like online, the competition must be pretty fierce. I dunno. Online, people are looking for the perfect match for them, they aren’t interested in settling, so women who are not attractive will reach out to attractive guys and vice versa, it’s an exercise in futility. I think an attractive woman, who is not outgoing, who just goes to work and does her thing, might be more receptive than someone at a bar, or online, etc. It’s probably very fertile ground for the right guy. They also say women like confidence, it takes shit tons of confidence (probably more than I have) to just approach a woman on the street and put the moves on her. This is old school stuff. You hear the story about some average dude who is always mackin. He hits on everyone he sees. Dudes like this claim to get laid by someone different every day. Is it a tall tale? Definitely. Is it possible? Probably. I think if you have solid moves, look good, are in shape, and get yourself out there to 14 women a day, you could get laid at least twice a week by different women. I think that’s possible. Getting laid by tons of different women is not really my goal, but it’s just a thought.

Not much else to say. I’m a little beat today. I went to the Sox game last night and the game lasted forever. The Sox lost and are now totally out of the playoff picture. I went with a buddy from work, which was cool, always good to make new friends. We bailed the game early, but should’ve been about 10 minutes earlier. I thought the train was at 1050. I busted to make it by then. I got there at 1046, it left at 1040. Hosed. I had to wait for the next train 1140. So I got home at 1230 and got to bed around 1. I got up at 7, so now I’m dragging a bit. I’m totally gonna get a good night’s sleep tonight. I have a bunch of stuff to do. I should take some practice tests for the series 4. I also got some books from people at work. The French girl lent me the girl with the Dragon tattoo, and my Sox buddy lent me The Road. I’m way amped to read these books, but I think I have to focus on the 4 and knock that out before I start reading. I’m weird that way. I don’t want to be mixing reading for pleasure and reading for work. I’m sure my mind can handle it, but when I get focused on something like passing the 4. I just want to knock it out with no distractions.

Read these words

2010-09-16T22:44:00.000-07:00

I am so amped right now. I just got done giving a compliance and ethics training thing to the new trainees. 9 guys, 10 including the instructor. It was cool. I was a little nervous, but not debilitatingly nervous. It went really well. They were so receptive and asked questions. They gave me the respect a man of my stature deserves. That feels good. I guess I had it set up in kind of a fun engaging way. The whole purpose of the thing was just to encourage them to seek help from compliance or their team lead if they ever get into a grey area with regard to their trading. I had 4 case studies and I laid them out, one by one, in as unbiased a manner as possible. Then I went around the room and asked if they thought the scenario was acceptable or unacceptable. It was funny. Some of the guys thought the acceptable stuff was unacceptable and vice versa. The first scenario was layering and I took it from a recent case against Trillium where they got dinged for 2.3 million. You can read about it online. They all got that one as being unacceptable. The last one was an Oil scenario where Conagra got fined for 12 million because a trader wanted to be the first one to trade oil at 100. He said in e-mails and other places: “If it gets near 100, I’m going to be a madman to get the first print up there.” He also said, “Some people collect art, we collect prints.” Pretty stupid. They just wanted to be the first ones to trade there. Well the premeditation made it manipulation. They were dinged for executing a trade at a non bona fide price, for non bona fide purposes. Expensive print, 12 million, they probably could’ve gotten a Picasso for that price if they just collected art. So I left and I got called back for an encore, they had more questions. Good times. They’re good kids.

I decided not to contact the girl. (And there was much rejoicing.) Thanks to everyone for their opinions on this thing. I seriously considered contacting her, and in so doing, it really helped me figure things out. My best case scenario was that I take her to see the National and get back on her “pay no mind” list. It sucked being there. It sucked wondering if she was interested, if she was ever going to get back to me, it sucked waiting. I’m basically through most of the hard part of moving on (I’m sure you would all disagree.) But I’ve come a long way in forgetting and I feel like I’m better off just moving on, rather than going back to being unhappy. I thought I had a bunch more to say about it. Well last night when I came to the realization that she wasn’t what I wanted, that I didn’t want to go back to that, and I don’t want to contact her, I felt such a relief. I felt so good, it had to be the right thing, because it felt right. I guess I’m just more naïve than most people on this stuff. I always think of things in the best possible way for my own purposes. It’s like most people would say, “she doesn’t get back to you, she’s not interested.” Well she said she was busy, she did get back to me eventually. I would spin the thing in my mind to make it work. I wanted it to work and I’m really not sure why.

Last night was the first Religion class. The way our ccd works is that you go as a family. Which means I take all the kids. It’s my day, the importance of religion is my thing, so I take them. My daughter had an audition last night, so I took the boys. The ccd is once a month for two hours. The first hour is everyone together, and the second hour is in classrooms separated. We got there a little late and they had some kind of revival thing going. A woman was playing guitar and singing about Jesus and people were dancing around. They’d say, “Jesus to the north” and turn north, south, east, and west. It was kinda weird. I didn’t learn the Jesus macarena, so I felt ok just hanging out. The thing is that everyeone was doing it. Including the adults. I was thinking, “what did they say to everyone to get them to do this? Did they threaten them?” It was weird how everyone was dancing, I felt a little self conscious about not dancing, which is also weird. My daughter arrived a little after that and eventually we went to our classrooms. My boys were on their own because they are in Jr. High, but my daughter is still in the family class, so I had to attend that with her. Don’t get me wrong, I like our teacher, she is very dedicated and religious, that’s to be commended. She is a bit quirky though. At one point she said to the kid sitting near us, “I see your name is Andrew, I like that name, do you know why? It’s the name of my guardian angel.” Immediately I’m thinking “When do they tell us the name of our guardian angel? Did I miss that? Was that at confirmation?” A second later I got my answer. She said, “Do you want to know how I found out the name of my guardian angel?” I nodded my head emphatically. “Well, I was at a retreat and the priest there said, ‘if you want to find out the name of your guardian angel, just ask.’” She continued, “so that night, I got in bed and cleared my mind of all the clutter and I asked my guardian angel, ‘what’s your name?’ and the first name that popped into my head was Andrew.” I was pretty skeptical at this point. I didn’t right away ask my guardian angel what his/her name was, but I started thinking about it. I tried to focus, but I was being bombarded with names. Finally it came to me. I’m pretty sure my guardian angel’s name is…Kent.

I talk crazy

2010-09-15T19:27:00.001-07:00

So I was running all over the place last night and then I got home. I talked to my buddy on the phone, went up and got on the computer, and around 10pm I realized that I hadn’t busted my wig down. Dr. Choppy had taken 3 huge chunks of hair out of the back of my head and contrary to some of the reviews I got, it was definitely visible. Somebody told me that you couldn’t see it unless you were looking. You could see it. It really looked like a three clawed creature had scratched the hair out of my head in one quick swoop. I had to get out the clippers even though what I wanted to do was hit the satchmo. It was actually fun busting the wig cuz I did have like an inch of growth. The only problem is that I missed a spot. Well I didn’t miss it, but I couldn’t see it well and the clippers just didn’t want to go there. That means there’s a little patch of long hairs right on the top of my dome. I really don’t think it’s visible. If I had a pair of scissors I could bust it down no prob, I just gotta get around to it. And not forget. Maybe I’ll just grab some shears, run into the bathroom and handle it. Might not be a bad idea. I should’ve jumped in the shower after I busted and washed all the hair off. Instead I shook my head over the garbage can and went to bed. Checked the pillow case this morning, should’ve showered. Oh well, I just dusted the pillow case. No harm done.

On the dating tip. Not much new to report. My success at getting a response with one e-mail is reverting back to the mean. I did get a sort of response from this one woman, only it was an automated negation from Match. That was cool though, better that than nothing. I got an e-mail last night from somebody. I gave her the automatic neg. She was creepy looking. One reason why I was running late last night is that the weird woman from way back who tried to booty call me on a Thursday night, well she messaged me. Totally freaked me out. I thought she was gone. I felt obligated to chat with her for a few minutes and that set me back. I was trying to multi-task and talk on the phone, that didn’t work. I had to bail. It’s getting to the point where I’m going to have to do something with my National tix. I think I’m gonna sell em.

I’ve been tripping on this conversation that I had with somebody last night. We were talking about online dating and he said, “in the old days, you’d get 3 or 4 rejections in a year, this was normal. Now with the speed you can meet someone, you can get 3 or 4 rejections in a week. You have to mentally prepare for that.” That’s not really what I was tripping on, but it got us talking about how with online dating, you are pulling from a huge pool of people that you may have little in common with. Honestly, looks are everything. You can pretty much forego the fact that they are vegetarian, into triathlons, into traveling, cooking, watching TV, etc. and want them just based on looks. The people that are into what you are into that aren’t attractive don’t even merit a second glance. I should say that if a woman is moderately good looking and into things you are into, it’s a plus. It gets them in the door. It might get a date, or lunch, or something, then you can figure it out from there. The other thing we discussed was that traditionally, people met through mutual friends, school, work, church, etc. These connections usually involved a good bit of common ground to build from: mutual friends, similar job, similar scholastic predilections, etc. Online, who knows? You could be meeting someone who is from a completely different part of the country, totally different upbringing, different school, different job, different religion, the chances of a match are slimmer because you are working with less common ground. Thus the rejection rate should be even higher based upon the difficulty in finding someone you are compatible with. Don’t get me started, but there still may be a kind of stigma associated with online dating and you may be able to stereotype online daters as having either a variety of social flaws or a common flaw. It’s something I’ve been grappling with, it goes something like, “are all these people insane?” They might be. Or a good number of them might be.

This morning I was getting in my car and this latin American man yelled to me from across the street, “Check it out. In the circle. It’s a skunk.” I looked, saw the skunk and said, “yeah.” I was putting stuff in my trunk and the skunk was like 20 feet away. It was in the trees in the cul-de-sac and it seemed to be going about its business. The dude across the street was like, “There’s a skunk in the circle!” I was like, “Yeah, I see it, thanks.” I dunno why this guy was so hung up on the skunk, did he think it was going to attack me? I almost ran a skunk over on my bike one day and it didn’t spray me. I think you really have to come after a skunk to even get it to notice you. I don’t think they run after people to spray them, it’s a defense mechanism. As I pulled out of the driveway one of the neighbors was walking his dog. I stopped and rolled down my window and told him about the skunk. Now he could’ve (and might’ve) gotten sprayed if the dog went apeshit after the skunk. I don’t know the neighbor, but I figured it was the right thing to do. As I was driving away I thought, a lot of people probably wouldn’t have stopped to warn the guy. I figured it was the right thing to do.

Hair today gone tomorrow

2010-09-14T19:58:00.001-07:00

I actually had something to write about and I can’t remember what it is. It’s kinda bumming me out. Not nearly as much as the fact that there is a big patch of hair missing from the back of my head. I had to take a hair test as part of the custody evaluation. I’ve been growing my hair out to do it, which looks stupid and it’s been a pain to schedule the thing. So the guy says he’ll meet me over there today at 7 am. That works for me. I get there and the guy is like, “You’ve got plenty of hair, no worries.” Cool. Then he takes a pair of kiddie scissors and cuts just huge clumps of hair out of the back of my head. I pay him 125 bucks for his troubles and cruise. I really didn’t have time to go home, shave my head, shave my neck, take a shower to get all the hair off, etc. I just had to go into work like my kids attacked me with scissors. I’m basically walking around at work like that, and I asked somebody if it was obvious and they said yes. Oh well. I just have to make it through the day and then I can shave all of this crazy stupid hair off.

I’m starting to bug about what I’m going to do with my National tickets. The show is sold out. I think I can get 200 for the pair. It is taking every bit of my will power to resist contacting that girl and asking if she is going. I don’t know if I’m stubborn or what the exact definition of my problem is, but I can boil it down. I was thinking about it yesterday and I just have a picture of how things are going to work out. When things don’t work out according to that picture, it irritates me. The reason I bought tickets to the National was to go with this girl. She likes the National. I think The National are ok. I don’t have much desire to go with anyone else, it’s either ask this girl, or sell the tickets. I just want to know if she is going. If she’s going, great, then I’ll sell the tickets. If not, then she should go. She wants to go. She loves the new album. I bought these tickets so she could go. It just bothers me that the tickets are not being used for their purpose, and that there will be utility lost from my plan not going how I envisioned. Not necessarily overall utility, but the utility that I have baked into this whole scenario with my mind.

I won my first fantasy fb match up. That rocks. Always good to start out with a win. Lots of season left though and I need to grab somebody off the waiver wire. I have the #1 waiver pick and there has to be a diamond out there to take. Tough to figure the line on ND vs. UMass. On USAtoday it says off for most of the betting houses, someone has Umass as a 21 pt dog, and another at 30. I think Michigan will be pretty good as long as Denard Robinson stays healthy, hopefully they will only need him for the first half against UMass. I can tell you one thing, the ticket prices have got to be going up. Before the season, nobody knew if M was going anywhere, now they have one of the most exciting players in the country on the field. I’m sure people want to come see him in person. It’s def worth seeing. He did things against ND that were pretty amazing. He looked like he was playing at a speed no one else on the field could come close to. At least on that 97 yard play. There’s still baseball going on and the Sox are not mathematically eliminated yet. They play 3 games against the twins starting today and they need to sweep to have a chance. I hope they do it. I’m going to the game on Thursday, I hope it’s for the sweep, that would be crazy exciting.

Crazy Car Talk

2010-09-13T19:56:00.001-07:00

I had a good weekend. Spent a lot of quality time with the kids which is really fun. They say the funniest things and it’s really fun to get talking to them. We were in the car like 7 hours or something, so we did a lot of chatting. At one point we were talking about cars. I told them that if I could have any car it would be a Prius. I went into how it’s good for the environment and it’s quiet, all the reasons I think I would like it (other than the actual reason that I will get to). My one son says, “Why are you specifically looking at a Toyota?” I was like, “I don’t know.” He says, “It is because of the ‘Toyota Last chance Sales Event?’” I was like, “yeah, it’s definitely because of the Toyota last chance sales event.” It was so bizarre, he said it with the exact rhythm and intonation of the commercial. I wouldn’t have come up with that on my own, but I definitely recognized it from the commercial. It shows how powerful advertising is, how it permeates our lives without us even knowing it. It’s so insidious that even our children will be parroting the words back to us to get us to succumb to the urge to buy a Toyota. Or whatever. It wasn’t really scary though, it was funny. The kids say funny things, there were other things, I just can’t remember them.

This has been covered in another blog, but I didn’t even tell my kids the real reason I want a prius. It’s not because it’s good for the environment or because it’s quiet. Although those are good corollary reasons. The real reason is because I think it is elegant, economical, and not showy in any way. Well, I shouldn’t say not showy in any way because I think a lot of people drive them to make a statement and feel all high and mighty for the environment, “We sold our Bentley and bought a Prius, we felt it was the right thing to do.” I think there is some of that out there, but that sorta makes it edgy. It’s almost like driving a Prius says “Fuck You” to the dinguses in their Porsches, BMWs, Benzs, Maseratis, Chevy Novas, etc. People that live in my neighborhood seem to gather some of their identity by what they drive. I think they think it’s important to “make a statement” with their vehicle. I think the statement they are trying to make is one of the following: I’m better than you, I have more money than you, or my parents have more money than yours and they left it to me. I just have no desire to play that game, and I think a Prius makes the statement that: Maybe I could play that game but I don’t want to, maybe I’m a tree hugger, maybe I just like crappy little quiet cars.

Back to car conversations with the kids. Well, it’s been a while since the kids had me speechless, but it happened yesterday. We were driving to meet my family for dinner, when my oldest, in 7th grade, said something to the effect of “you should’ve been an abortion” or something to one of the other kids. I said, “don’t ever say that, and abortion is a very bad thing, you shouldn’t talk about it or say those things to other people.” I mean, my kids have been to the Robert Crown Center, I think they know how the male and female reproductive systems work. Now that I think of it, I should probably sit my oldest down and have a talk. Just to make sure that he doesn’t think babies come out of women’s bellybuttons or something way off kilter. I’ll make a mental note of that. Ok. So we are sitting in the car and the word abortion is just hanging around in the air. I think one of the kids asked what an abortion was. I told them something like, “it’s a very bad thing and you are too young to understand it, but you shouldn’t talk about it.” I didn’t know what else to say. I know the boys are in Junior high, I know they talk, they should know what’s going on just from their friends. Obviously my third grade daughter has no idea. She definitely is not ready to have that discussion, maybe when she’s 25. I don’t know what more to say. I just think it’s something that everyone should consider: if you had to explain abortion to an adolescent, how would you do it? I think it would help a person to develop an opinion about it.

Don't read this

2010-09-10T21:15:00.001-07:00

I’m really bumming cuz it looks like rain this weekend. I hope the weatherman is wrong. It’s like I’m taking the kids to the Michigan vs. Notre Dame game. I’ve been looking forward to it forever, my bud got me some solid tix. I’m ready to rock. The kids are amped. Family fun that can’t be beat. Now it looks like rain. That sucks. On other sucky news, the guitarist/singer from the band decided “thanks but no thanks.” He’s the guy that said he broke up his last band cuz he was a dick. He could (and did) carry the whole band though, and I like those types of musicians. I don’t know if those types of musicians like to carry everybody though. I’m guessing no. Practice got called off for tonight, so that’s good. They are trying to line up a practice for next Weds, but I can’t make it til later. That might be ok though. They can work on some songs and then I can come in and mop up around 9. I’m good like that.

I sent the punk rock girl a message on Match and she sent me an e-mail. We are gonna try to get together. I wanted to grab a beer tonight, but I haven’t heard back from her. I guess I should just IM her, I know that will go straight to her phone. I don’t know why I abandoned that as a means of conversation. I guess I thought it was invasive. I wouldn’t be crazy about someone IMing me on my phone so I didn’t want to do it to someone else. Well it’s basically the only way to communicate with this woman, so I might as well use it. It’s so weird in this day and age that communication would be difficult. People are basically accessible 24 hours a day via cell/text, I just can’t buy that people don’t have time for it. I think the punk girl is about it though. There’s some other woman stalking me on Match. She is pretty cute. She’s the one who said she was into music and when I asked who she said “nickelback and creed.” No lie. I shouldn’t be such a music snob. Maybe I’ll send her an e-mail. I can’t even remember how our first e-mails got derailed. I’m pretty sure she stopped messaging me. I’m also trying to devise a way to hook back in with the burlesque girl. That’s a work in progress. Hold the phone. I just got a Match e-mail and one of the women is smoking and it says she’s an intellectual. I’m not sure if that’s a good combo or not. It sounds good though. I think I have a better chance with the smarter ladies. Either that, or I just don’t feel like hanging around with an idiot just to get laid. It doesn’t really matter; I’d rather hang with a smart chick.

I got into a fantasy football league. I was going to blow this year off, but it’s so hard. Fantasy football has to be more addictive than crack. It just makes pro football a million times more fun. I can’t even watch the pros unless my fantasy guys are going. I don’t think I have a good team. This league kinda blows goats. No live draft. That is a shitfest waiting to happen. You just don’t know what you need when. I didn’t even know the draft order. It’s like, if I had one of the first 3 picks, I would’ve ranked those guys. I had the swing pick 10. Not a bad pick, but the computer picked two running backs I’ve never heard of. Some guy from the jets who gets to compete with LT, and some guy from the Chargers. Brees was still available. No doubt I would’ve picked him. My next two picks were Tony Romo, who is ok, and Desean Jackson. DJ absolutely hosed me two years ago. He spiked the ball on the 1 during regular season. That cost McNabb a td, and cost me the game that week. Well losing that game cost me #1 seed in the playoffs that year, and that cost me 2k. I ended up in 3rd place, lost in the semis. No money. DJ better make it up to me this year. I forget who else I have. Giants D, they’re pretty good. Jermichael Finley, is he any good? I might have to hit the waiver wire. I def need LT, if he’s available, handcuffage. I’m glad I’m doing FFB, it’s a good time.

The White Sox are looking pretty crappy. They might be out of it before Minnesota even comes to town. As of right now, the White Sox have to sweep them just to be in the picture. I don’t see it happening. I don’t think the Sox can catch the Twins. Stranger things have happened, but the Twins just never lose. They’ll prolly sweep the Sox. They’re better. If the Sox would’ve held onto Jim Thome, they would be a lot better off. If Peavy hadn’t gotten hurt, the Sox would probably be in the driver’s seat. Oh well. Wait til next year.

Imagine

2010-09-10T21:11:00.000-07:00

I have an overactive imagination and sometimes I think that’s not a good thing. I def think it’s an issue in this computer age. When I send out an e-mail or a text, I know that the other party gets it almost immediately. I know it’s out there, and I expect a response. Here’s an example. I have a friend who works in St. Louis, he’s my old boss. Well I’ve been reaching out to this guy on facebook, e-mail, and…that’s about it. But I’ve sent like 5 messages that didn’t get responses. My mind started to run. I seriously thought this guy was mad at me. Insert tragic story. So another guy that we worked with back in the day, his brother died. The guy who died was my age. I don’t know how he died, but it was crazy sad and I sent my condolences. Well I contacted this dude and said, “That was really tragic what happened to our friend.” No response. So then I start thinking, “ok, someone told this guy that I’m getting a divorce and he probably thinks I’m abandoning my kids, he probably thinks I’m a scuzzball and doesn’t want anything to do with me.” This is how my mind works. When something isn’t making sense, I will start to think of scenarios and then boil it down to the most likely one. I boiled it down to 2 scenarios, he’s really busy, or he’s angry at me. Finally I broke down and asked him if I offended him in some way. I did it in such a way that I didn’t come off looking like too much of a psycho. He got back to me right away, “Did I miss some e-mails, what happened, blah blah blah.” It was no biggie. He was just busy. Weird though.

Another weird thing happened to me yesterday. I was leaving work and some dude walks up to me and says, “Somebody’s gonna be pitched.” I’m like, “yeah?” This dude was one of those guys where you can’t pinpoint whether he’s homeless or what right away. My first thought (active imagination) was that someone was going to be pitched off of a roof or something for the Transformers movie that they’re filming. Although I thought they were done filming. Then he says again, “Somebody’s gonna be pitched. See that Cherokee back there? The windows busted out. Glass all over the place. Somebody’s gonna be pitched. I didn’t do it.” I was like, “Yeah. I didn’t do it either.” He’s like, “well somebody’s gonna be pitched.” Then as I approached the street to cross I noticed that he stepped back like the street was a river of molten lava. I said, “See you” as I crossed the lava to the safety of the other side. I think the guy wasn’t going to tempt fate by following me. Lucky.

It looks like rain for the Notre Dame vs. Michigan game. Bummer. I hope the weatherman is wrong. Either way I’m going to have to go out and buy some ponchos for me and the kids. It sucks standing in the rain, but you gotta do it sometimes. It’s just such a downer, cuz you just envision the day being nice, sunny, warm. You picture yourself throwing the football around, playing with the kids, having a cold one, eating a sandwich. You can’t do all that stuff in the rain. You can sit in the car. You can go inside. That’s about it. No need to get to the game early if you are just gonna sit in the car while it rains. It sucks. Weekend ahead. I’m sure I’ll have more stories next week. Hopefully I’ll have the story of a Michigan victory.

Mall and Match

2010-09-08T19:59:00.000-07:00

The hardest thing is being just borderline pretty solid. It’s like, if you are not attractive, you know it, and you deal with it. Like I saw a dude the other day with a fucked up hairdo, he was like 100 pounds overweight and had a megadeth t-shirt on. He looked like a mess. This dude, he’s not thinking he can hook up with some hottie, he’s just scoutin out the next cheeseburger (or 10). That’s easy. You don’t have to fret about whether you have a chance or not, you just know you don’t. I’m in the unfortunate position of knowing that I have a chance, and thus feeling like I need to make it happen and that I fucked up if I don’t make it happen. I know it takes more than 2 to tango, or something like that (Billy Madison, I love that line). It’s just I think I’m pretty awesome, so it’s a bit of a shocker when things don’t work out for me. It’s all about how you slice it up. You could say, I’m cool, if I just hang out, things will work out. You could say, I’m awesome, I need to go out and make things happen. It’s crazy. I wrote this yesterday, and I know what I was trying to say then, but I don’t have the same inspiration right now. All I was trying to say is that things are easier when you have low expectations and harder when you have high expectations. I need to figure out how to lower my expectations on myself and everyone else. I need to be a bit more chill. I think. I’m definitely tempted to put the dating on hold…

The reason I prolly won’t put the dating on hold is that I got an extension from Match.com. They have some kind of loser guarantee where if you shockingly don’t meet someone in 6 months they’ll give you another six. Well my deal was set to expire around the 14th, so I started trying to contact match. I called like 4 times and I kept getting put on hold forever or one time I made it all the way through and I was waiting for an operator when the line went dead. Total hosing. So then I called and I just hit the button for new subscription. I got an operator in like 3 seconds. The dude was really nice and even though I didn’t qualify for the extension, he gave it to me anyway. It’s what you call taking pity on a loser who can’t get a woman on a website with like 50,000 women on it in a 25 mile radius (possibly more I dunno). I still have the match thing til March, and I have OKCupid forever it would seem, so I’ll stick with it. It’s just I don’t have any time. With the band, the board membership, football season, the kids, I just don’t have time to date.

On the dating tip. The date yesterday went really well, but there wasn’t really a spark. I sent the girl an e-mail and she was really cool about it. She wants to stay in touch and be friends. That’s fine with me. I started thinking about the punk girl from Match. She’s the only one left out of all the women that I was talking about like a week ago. Wow they come and go. I sent her an e-mail and I’d like to try to get together with her tomorrow. We’ll see. I was thinking about dropping the burlesque dancer a line. She sorta just let our e-mail conversation die, so I can try to rekindle that. Lots of crazy stuff going on. Tons of good shows coming up too, so I’d like to line up a girlie to take with. The other crazy thing about match, I did this test where they try to pinpoint a woman that will be love at first sight. Basically you pick out of a bunch of pictures and different types of women and then they match that data against people in your area. They must use face recognition software or something. I totally forgot I did the thing, and I go on my matches and there’s this woman who is like visually exactly what I’m looking for, my perfect match (looks wise). I go through her profile and it’s like Something about Mary, she likes sports, she golfs, she is totally smoking. Then I realize that she is one of my love at first sight matches. That shit worked like nobody’s business. That kinda freaked me out. I did not message the girl, she had seriously bitchy picky stipulations in her profile: NO KIDS, NO DIVORCEES, DON’T WASTE MY TIME!!! She seemed like kind of a bitch. I think she was looking for a younger dude too. I think she also might’ve been into Nickelback. It was crazy how beautiful she was though. And I’m guessing still is.

The other dating thing I should mention is that there is this girl from Wisconsin who is nutty hot, I sent her a message about how I love dairy products and she has checked out my profile a few times. I think she is on the fence. I can’t decide if I should send her another message and say, “hey let’s chat, I won’t bite, hard.” I don’t know how that would go over though.

I went to the outlet Mall on Monday. I went with my ps (I’m such a loser) and we got there like an hour after it opened. The outlet mall is kind of a scam. I think you can get better deals at TJ Maxx than at the outlet mall. I did manage to handle some business though. I needed some new jeans and shorts. My old jeans just don’t fit. I’ve lost like 15 lbs and now my jeans are like potato sacks. They’re all baggy and look like shit. So I got some new jeans at Levis. I think they are pretty alright. I just can’t bring myself to buy nice designer jeans. I think they look stupid and guys that wear them look like tools. I got two pairs of Levi 514s in size 34. They are not too tight, but they’re a little snug. They properly display my buttocks. I picked up a pair of shorts at Oakley. I actually tried on some 32s and got them on, but if I would’ve tried to pick something up off the ground, they would’ve shredded. I really dig the stuff at Oakley, they have cool clothes. Then I busted over to the gap. You get crazy deals at the gap. I got a pair of jean shorts for $8. I tried on 35s and they basically fell off. I went with 33s. They have a lot of room too, I dunno what is up with their sizing. When I was waiting in line at the Gap there were some Eastern Block women in front of me. I got to thinking about how they are probably used to fighting 5 people for a loaf of bread and now they get to go shopping and buy shit in America; what a dream. I bet they think it’s a dream.

Disposability

2010-09-07T16:25:00.000-07:00

Oh boy, lunch date today. Should be interesting. Had a great chat with the girl last night and we really had a similar outlook on dating and everything. I told her about some of the near misses I’ve had, where you think there’s something there and if fizzles. She said she hasn’t felt like “there might be something there” in a long time. Bummer. We came to a few conclusions. Well one hard and fast rule. A connection should never end on a text. Wishful thinking for sure. I would probably have at least 2 connections still going if that were a cultural norm. Norm. So we got to chatting I said it’s frustrating with online dating because it seems accepted to treat other people as if they were disposable. There’s no question that for whatever reason, people look at online dating connections as disposable. Maybe the person just doesn’t have time for it and it’s a nuisance. “Oh well, it’s only an online dating thing, who cares.” Who knows what the motivations might be. I don’t live my life that way. I don’t treat people as if they were disposable. I at least give them the respect and courtesy that everyone deserves. I told that one girl from OKC that it just wasn’t a match. I told the punk girl from Match that I wasn’t interested. It’s hard to give someone the dis, but it’s the right thing to do. If you exchange an e-mail with someone, if there is a connection, you owe it to the other person to give them closure. That’s how I feel anyway. So we’re chatting last night and the girl says, “Well you are not disposable to me.” That was so cute. What a nice thing to say. I told her that she is not disposable to me either. I wonder if that is the first time that exchange has ever been made. It could become a cultural norm. Norm. Before you say you are “in like.” Before you say “I’m way into you.” Before you say “I lll*vv u.” You say, “You are not disposable to me.”

I had a good weekend. I had the kids on Friday. That was fun. Then on Saturday morning I cruised to South Bend for the Notre Dame/Purdue game. Good time. Hung with some Purdue faithful, and ND faithful. It was a nice crisp day. A little windy. A little chilly at times. Overall, good football weather. ND won the game and Brian Kelly got off to a good start as ND head coach. I’m trying to think of other eventful things. Good times meeting up with an old friend of a friend. At one point does a friend of a friend just become a friend? I guess I would call this guy and the others of his ilk that went to ND with my friend, friend. The game was fun. I guess Michigan looked really good in their game. I’m glad. Next week’s game should absolutely rock. Nothing better than two undefeated teams going head to head. I don’t know how many years Michigan and Notre Dame are going to play. Maybe 2. It sounds like M wants to move on. With the restructuring in the big 10, we might end up playing Ohio State twice in a season, we’ll also play Nebraska every year. I’m thinking that they will stagger Ohio State and Nebraska so that we don’t have them at home in the same year, that will help our season ticket sales. Prolly wouldn’t hurt to have Michigan State and ND in there too to sweeten the thing. Who knows. It was a fun day at ND though, it was good to hang with everybody. It’s a long day though. I got up at 6 am to get on the road, by 10 pm, I was kinda beat. We all went out though, which was good. Had some beers. Took it easy, that was the wise thing to do. I think we were tempted to keep it going at like 1230, but discretion was the better part of valor and we all went back and crashed. Good move.

I’m glad I crashed cuz my boys had their first football games on Sunday. We were really worried about our one son making weight. He had to lose like 9 ounces in 2 days. I don’t know how it all works, but he came in at 3 pounds under the weight limit. I know he worked hard and ate very little for like 2 days, still, that seems like a big shift in 2 days. We weren’t going to question it. He had a good game. It’s always nice when you are basically one of the biggest guys on the field. He seemed to be in the backfield on every play on defense. He stripped the ball on one play and stopped a guy in the backfield on another. It was fun to watch. They rolled their opponents too. I think they won like 33 to 7 or something. My other son’s team got rolled. It looked like he was mixing it up when he got in there. That was good. It was a fun time.

Ok. Phew. For a second there I had nothing to write about. I totally forgot about the e-mail I had sent myself with possible topics in it. I have a ton to talk about now. I went with my ps to Costco on Sunday. They wanted me to look at the computers. While we were there I grabbed some other necessary items like socks, t-shirts, and 6 lbs of protein shake mix. I’M GONNA GET HUGE!!!!!! On the way home, they mentioned to me about this woman who recently got divorced. She was our neighbor back in the day and now her whole family lives in one of the nicest subdivisions in town and they are all filthy rich. This woman is about 8 years older than me. Back in the day, she was really cute and no question an object of my pre-pubescent fantasies. Who knows what she looks like now. I’m definitely not a cougar guy, or I don’t even know if that classifies as cougar. I think I’m too old to be cougar prey, I could be wrong. I started thinking about it though, just because that’s what my mind tends to do. It would seriously be like winning the lottery, well sort of. I could never do it; I’m just getting out of an unhappy relationship, so I would not seek to enter a new relationship on questionable grounds. I guess it’s just something you have to consider. You have to think about what might be best for you and your kids. It’s like, I would be totally comfortable, my kids’ college would be paid for, no worries about money ever again. At what cost though? The cost of self-fulfillment. I’m sure I wouldn’t be motivated to do anything if I had no financial worries. I couldn’t cheat on her, I’m not like that, so if I was unhappy, I’d just have to live with it. I thought this would be a long solid philosophically fruitful discourse, it’s not working out that way. It all depends on what you are looking for. I’m looking for a solid meaningful relationship of equals, hopefully with someone who I find physically attractive. Some guys might be looking for a sugar momma. If they look hard enough, they’ll find one. They’re out there.

I guess that is enough. I gotta figure out what’s up with lunch. I will have more tomorrow.

Fryday

2010-09-03T11:38:00.001-07:00

Well I reached out to 3 new women last night. One of them is drop dead smoking. She went to Wisconsin and is blonde. I’m a sucker for blondes. One of them got back to me. She seems really nice. She might be a little big. But as Spinal Tap says, “The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin.” I’m totally drawing a blank on other women that were in the picture. I think they’re pretty much all gone. One punk girl was sorta hanging on, I told her let’s switch to e-mail, she sent me an e-mail, I replied, and that was it. Whatever.

I met with the guys from Red Tape Theatre. I had a suspicion that I would attend the meeting and walk away without really knowing what the duties of a board member actually entail, that suspicion was confirmed. I guess they meet quarterly, talk money, talk about the projects, talk about direction, that’s about it. I don’t think there really is a set list of duties for board members. The guys were really cool. It was fun to hear them talk about the theater because they had so much passion for it. It’s exciting. I love the theater. It is a love that kind of went dormant, but when I was in New York I saw a couple of shows and it reminded me of how much I like it. I am pretty sure I could be a board member if I choose to be. I think I’ll probably do it. I really feel like it’s something I should consider. I feel like it could open up some doors and teach me about myself. I also might get laid by dropping the fact that I’m on the Red Tape Theater board. It can’t hurt.

It was really weird yesterday. I wrote about an elephant in the room. Brendan from Bad Sandwich Chronicles used the same line in his blog. That’s fucked up. Usually people say there’s a gorilla in the room. I said elephant, he said elephant. Maybe people say elephant too and it’s not that weird. On the subject of the elephant. I was talking to my buddy Nick, the member of the ensemble who got me to consider becoming a board member. I was telling him about the practice last night, joking with him and laughing about the people. As I reflected on the moment and how people really like me, I realized that I’m pretty kick ass. If people don’t see that right away and want to be around that, then fuck em.

Speaking of the band. J/K, they’re cool. So I got there and I could hear them playing. I rang the doorbell and walked in. The dude was coming up to get the door and there I was in the dark. I scared the shit out of him. Nice first impression. He is a cool dude, we’ll call him Ken. Ken lives alone in a house about 2 minutes from my parents, perfect. It’s just him because he’s going through a divorce, the house is on the market. That’s going to be the practice spot. It’s really a quirky little house, cool though. I dunno what Ken’s deal is, but he’s got a BMW z4 in the garage. He said he was a high school teacher. He had shaggy hair and tattoos, I’m guessing he might have some trouble with the co-eds. The guys all came up and helped me bring my stuff down. I found a spot and set up. For our first song together, we decided to play Lucky man by the verve. I was nervous, I’m used to punk. I don’t know Lucky man well, the first time I heard it was like a week ago and maybe I’ve listened to it 4 times since then. We get going and I guess I was driving it a little hard. I guess I should’ve known by the fact that the singer couldn’t keep up. Finally one dude, we’ll call him Barney, stops it and starts getting on me (in a nice way) about the tempo, which I don’t like. I said I don’t know the song that well. He said, I can help you out. So he got this drum machine pedal going and it was totally annoying. I played along with it and thankfully we moved on to another song. Just Like Heaven. I’ve heard this song a million times, I know it, although I don’t have the crashes quite down yet. We played it and all the guys had boners. They thought we nailed it even though we didn’t. At least we didn’t have that damn click-track thing going. We never got that going again, which is good. Next we played Fake plastic trees. This is a good one cuz it starts slow and crescendos. It really lets us just jam, there’s no way to screw it up, it’s too simple. This song sounded good too and I think the guys were starting to realize that I can play. I wanted to play Where is my mind, they didn’t know it yet. We did play Just Like honey. That needs some work. We played a little of Pictures of you, that’s pretty easy and the drum is the same for the whole thing. I wish I had the little bells thing that is used in that song. I also wish I had the rattlesnake thing for Reptile, I might actually buy that. We also rocked I am the resurrection, Everyday is like Sunday, with or without you and a bastardized version of Sunday Bloody Sunday. It was really cool. The guys were cool. The guy that complained about the tempo, Barney. Barney is a little annoying. He talks about how he’s not good, which is rather pointless. We’re all good enough to play the songs. We don’t have to be much better. We’ll get better. Then Barney will be a total stickler about tempo and stuff. Weird. The other guy, Kyle (he looks like Kyle Gass a little), he’s probably the best musician, he also sings and does a pretty solid job of it. Kyle seemed cool and relaxed, then he came out with this gem, “My last band broke up because I was too much of a dick to everybody.” Not exactly the right thing to come out with at the first practice. We ended the jam and people started talking about what kind of band we wanted to be. Well I have a total vision for this band. We should be called 120 minutes. Have 3 1-hour sets of classic alternative tunes, and play at suburban bars. These guys seemed pretty adamant that they wanted to write some originals and eventually be all original. We’ll see how that goes.

At the end of the practice, the doorbell rings and someone comes in. It was definitely a woman, and she sounded young. The guys were packing up and I didn’t have to pack cuz I was just leaving everything. I go upstairs to see what’s up. Ken is talking to this girl (woman) that looked like a girl. She was short. She may have come from gymnastics practice. She had a jogging type bra on and some kind of bikini type bottoms and then gym shoes. She was ripped. She had to have been like 2% body fat. I almost got a boner just standing there. She was blonde, little, ripped, apparently a gymnast. Where do I sign up. I gotta do a match search for gymnastics. I’m guessing she was Ken’s girl. You go Ken!

I’m just about out of here. I have a short day today. Top secret. Then I’m off to ND tomorrow for the game. I’m pretty geeked about that. Although my dad informed me that we are leaving at 630 am tomorrow. I won’t even have time to work out. What can you do? Everybody have a good labor day weekend, and if you get a chance, rock out.

Oh you love it

2010-09-03T03:51:00.000-07:00

Well Kurdt pulled himself out of the vicious spiral. He seems pretty ok. I’m almost done with the book, so he must have a horrible relapse. He wrote a really nice note to his dad about how he doesn’t hate him, and he also wrote a really interesting love note to Courtney Love. He’s working on In Utero (geez did I have to wrack my brain to come up with that title) and he seems pretty into it. Something’s got to give though. Only 50 pages left. Quick read, I wouldn’t recommend it unless you are really into Nirvana.

Big practice with the band tonight. I had the kids last night and got home late. I just wanted to crash but I had to break down my drums and load them into the car. Good times. It wasn’t too bad. I’m a little worried cuz I packed my drums in the car and then drove it to park by the train. I hope I don’t come back to smashed windows and no drums. That would suck major balls. I also have the meeting today with the guys from Red Tape Theater. It should be good. I think the guy from work who is in the theater is gonna go, and another guy at work who is interested in being a bored member. Using bored instead of board is a Cobain thing. He does it all the time and you would think it’s clever, but it’s really annoying. The guy is obviously intelligent, but his grammar is not the best, you have to wonder if he’s trying to pull a cute pun, or if he just effed up. Hopefully I’ll have lots to report tomorrow. I was thinking about it this morning and it will be cool to hang out with these dudes and jam. There is always something to be gained from meeting new people and sharing information. I’m fired up. Should be a blast. Rock is good. I’m ready to rock out.

I guess I shouldn’t pretend like there isn’t an elephant in the room. I’m not quite over that thing with the girl. I’m really getting there though. It’s funny how the mind works and how it heals itself. I’ve been thinking about this a lot of different ways. At the very basic level, we were not compatible. She is a vegetarian, into languages, into world travel, very active, ran a half marathon (and put up a very good time), young, beautiful, successful?, mother of 2 young kids, seemingly pretty serious, foodie?, likes to cook, she might like to camp, don’t know if she likes animals, etc. She’s also going through a divorce just like me, so there’s that, she just started a new job. I’m not really buying that she didn’t have time to communicate, she just didn’t want to. I think that’s pretty obvious from the choice she made on Sunday. I’m not gonna say that I didn’t fuck it up, but she could’ve understood my frustration and said “hang in there we’ll talk soon.” She took the out because she wanted it. Maybe she does like me, but she def wanted to simplify. So I was thinking last night about writing her a serious goodbye, I just basically tossed out a “ThX, good luck with everything” final comment cuz I was pissed that she dissed me. As I was thinking about what I would say, part of it went something like this “I just wanted someone to share things with” and I was going to go into a list of things over the last month that I would have shared with her if she was remotely accessible or communicative. It was a long list. Then it dawned on me, she doesn’t want to share things with me, and she doesn’t want me to share things with her. I should just find someone who wants to share things. If the person I find wants to share her stevens, that’s fine too. As far as the goodbye goes, I don’t have anything to say. I was also gonna mention that I have tix to see The National at the Riv. I got the tix cuz she’s really into the National. Now it’s sold out. I dunno. It might be a good idea to leave it a few weeks and then text her to see if you would want to go to the National just as buds or something. I can’t decide. Or I could sell the tix for twice face and go to the boats.

Lotsa steeuff going on. I’m going to the ND game on Sat which should be fun. Kinda bummed to miss M’s opener, but we might get our dicks slapped by UConn, so I’m probably not missing much. I’ve got other things going on that are top secret. If I have news, you’ll hear it. The boys play their first football games on Sunday. That should be fun. I dunno what else. That’s it.

Two blogs for the price of 1

2010-09-01T20:35:00.000-07:00

The poker is no longer red hot. I still feel a little shitty, but way better than I felt yesterday. I got a great night’s sleep, so that helped. Well I fell asleep around 930 and I woke up at 3. Obviously I was thinking about that girl, and then I got this idea of writing her a text and saying sorry. The more I thought about it, the more I had to do it. So I grabbed my cell and wrote this long text. I didn’t send it though, sending a text at 3 am, she’d prolly call the cops. Anyhoo, I don’t think I’m gonna send it. I really don’t feel like I have anything to apologize for. I feel like I was the one who was being mistreated, strung along, etc. I just don’t believe that she was so busy that she couldn’t drop me a text or a call and check in. Any woman who was remotely interested, would have. We went on a date and haven’t spoken since. That was a month ago. I just don’t think there’s anything there, and what was there kinda got squashed by all the stuff we’ve been going through. I might as well share the text with you all, cuz I don’t think I’m going to send it.

M:

Can you forgive me one late-night ill-conceived text? All I’m guilty of is wanting to talk to you. I’m sorry I put you on the spot like that. It was immature. I was just trying to gauge your interest. Probably not wise to do it after drinking rogue ales at a punk show. You nailed it when you said it’s frustrating. The whole crazy mess we are going through is frustrating. I just thought we could help each other through it. If you can talk sometime, let me know.

J

Pretty pathetic. I still have some self dignity left. I better walk with the smidge that remains and try to rebuild with somebody else. I have a couple of prospects. Just nothing compared to this girl, she is smart and way cute. She’ll make somebody happy, or some other sad sack miserable, I can’t decide which.

I’m kinda torn about the whole thing. I like to take something away from these failures, but I’m not sure what to take away from this one. Dr. Love says (OMG how far have I fallen?) that when a girl is interested she lets you know, and why waste your time with a woman who isn’t interested when you can find one that is. I think that is what my punk show buddy was getting at when he suggested I come clean with her. When I told him that it was over he said “Good, now you can devote that energy to something else.” I was talking to my other buddy and his brother at the wake, they basically took the opposite tack. They thought I should’ve waited it out. Knowing what I know now, I would go back and wait it out. No redos on some of these things though. One thing I would take away and I knew this but my judgment was clouded, no ultimatums. There’s no win with an ultimatum. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. Give a woman an ultimatum and she’ll walk away every time. Tipsy texting, that’s gotta go, unless I know the woman really well. That’s two potentially good matches that got butchered due to texts. When in doubt, don’t send the text.

Today is really hard. I don’t know why. I haven’t lifted in a couple of days and I lifted today. Maybe that threw off my body chemistry. I’m just feeling this sickening sense of loss. I really feel like I majorly fucked up and I’m pretty pissed at myself about it. I’m also reading Curt Kobain’s diary, and that’s not exactly a feel good read. I’m getting to the point where he’s about to off himself. He’s really in a vicious spiral of pain and drugs. I guess he had some kind of stomach ailment that would make him violently ill for extended periods and in intense pain. He was taking drugs to deal with it. He was on heroine and had to kick a couple of times. Courtney was involved too. I’m thinking that Courtney kinda pushed him into the grave. I hate to say it, but I don’t think she was the right person for him. He definitely had mental issues and throw drugs and alcohol in there and it’s a recipe for disaster.

I’ve got so much crazy stuff going on in my life right now. It’s really a mess. I got an e-mail yesterday from the old punk band that threw me out and wanted to go on tour. I think I mentioned that in a previous blog. Now they want me to play drums with them at this Tea Party event up in BFE somewhere. It’s on Sunday the 12th. I have the kids, so it doesn’t line up. If I didn’t have the kids, I’d probably do it. There’s really no risk. If I suck, then who cares? I practiced the songs for my new band last night. We have a practice tomorrow night and I don’t think I’m going to be able to practice again before then. The songs are really good. Where is my mind, Fake Plastic Trees, Where the streets have no name, Pictures of you. I was only going to go through half the songs, and I ended up going through all of them. I basically played the drums straight through for an hour. That’s a good way to blow off some steam. The songs are not easy, and there are only a few that allow for some rest. In the past, I would’ve needed a nap after Streets, and now I can just roll with it. I guess I’m getting into pretty good shape. Running and lifting, it’s carrying over into other areas, which is cool.

Tomorrow I’ve got the meeting with the guys from Red Tape Theatre. That should be cool. I’m curious to hear what they have to say. Then I have to run and get to band practice by 8. I think the other guys are meeting at 6. Which is kinda weird. I guess I’ll be there at 6 next Thursday. So tomorrow is going to be busy and then I’m going to the ND game this Saturday, so that should be fun. I’m going to miss M though, which kinda stinks. I’ll have to DVR the M Game. I’ll be at the M game the next week though cuz they are playing ND. Rock on. That should be fun. That’s about it. I’m just not inspired today.

Sad Boy

2010-08-31T20:07:00.001-07:00

I kinda feel like I got a red hot poker jammed in my stomach. I fucking nuked that relationship I had going and I’m sorta bummed about it. I dunno. I went to a show last night. Teenage Bottlerocket. It was pretty good. I was hanging with my buddy and we were talking. We got to talking about this girl and I brought him up to speed on it. I guess I was just getting frustrated. The last time I talked to her was a month ago. Since then we’ve just exchanged random texts that usually end with me sending one and not receiving one. I hate to be a needy little girl, but I definitely needed more communication. My bud and I were talking about it and he was just like, come clean with her. The more I thought about it, the more sense it made. My original plan was just to wait it out. That just doesn’t fit with my personality. I just wanted to be honest with her. It probably wasn’t the best idea to send a text at 1130 on a Sunday night. I just figured it was as good a time as any. I basically just said that the “one text every two weeks situation wasn’t working for me.” I told her that if it doesn’t work for her, then let’s talk more. Or if she just wants to call it a day, let’s just do that. I’ve been fighting the urge to give her the out, because I really didn’t want her to take it. She took it. She basically responded that she has been busy with her divorce, two kids, new job, etc., and that she wishes me all the best. The funny thing is, I didn’t have to wait 3 days to get the response, I got it almost immediately. I was hoping for “let’s talk this week,” but I think I set myself up, and now I just have to accept the fact that I nuked the thing.

Teenage bottlerocket was pretty good. They remind me of the methadones a lot, except that they’re not the methadones which is kind of a bummer. I’d rather see the methadones. The show was at this place called Subterranean. I’ve never been there. Upon arrival, we walked into the vestibule and the music was emanating from the upstairs. I guess Subterranean is a bit of a misnomer, we ascended the stairs and entered the rock area. The place was pretty tiny. I guess it’s a little bigger than the beat kitchen. I wouldn’t say it could hold more than 200 people. I could be wrong there. They have an upstairs area where you can look over the balcony and see the band. We were like 5 feet from the stage and we really didn’t need any better vantage point, our spot was pretty sweet. There were some pretty cool looking punks there. Not really real punks, more posers, but they were getting pretty rowdy. There was a nice mosh pit going. My buddy got in there and mixed it up. I really didn’t. I’m sure I would own right now, I’m in pretty solid shape. I just wasn’t up for it. Some guy was getting rambunctious next to me, so I started pushing him. Then he grabbed me and we started jumping around and smashing into people. I let go and let him get enveloped by the mosh and that was that, I went back to my chill position. I guess Neil from the Lawrence arms was playing drums for TB cuz their drummer had a broken hand. I really couldn’t tell that the drummer was switching and I have no idea what Neil looks like, so I didn’t know until they announced it. That’s pretty cool that he can just sit in and play with about anybody and any time. I’m guessing he’s a TB fan or friend and knows the songs, which would help. Neil also played drums on the Noise by Numbers album.

I’ve got a crazy busy week this week, which is good I guess. I’ll be really glad to get some sleep tonight. I haven’t slept more than 5 hours in the last two days. The A/C is out and it’s like a million degrees in my room. I slept w just a sheet over me last night and I was a sweaty mess. I’m pretty worn down right now, I worked out yesterday morning, then I took the boys for a run. When the boys were done running, I went on another mile or so and I think I put in about 3 miles. Then we went golfing in the afternoon. I was just dying in the heat. Throw the show in there and I’m basically totally spent right now. Today I have the kids and I have to go to a wake tonight. Then tomorrow I’ve got this management training thing at work til 7. Wednesday I have the kids. Thursday I’m meeting with the guys from Red Tape Theatre, then I think I have practice with the new band. I’m nowhere near ready to play the new songs. I haven’t practiced. I gotta try to work in some practice this week. I also need to work out and sleep. I’d like to get a couple of runs in there too. Crazy times.

I have no idea

2010-08-27T21:06:00.000-07:00

I’m being semi-stalked by this girl on Match. I dunno. It’s like she gave me the dis (at Interpol like I said), then a day later she checked out my profile. I figured she was just taking one last look at the gorgeous hunk of man that she let slip through her fingers. Then today, almost two weeks later, she checks out my profile again. I’m def not going to check out her profile. I wasn’t that broken up about her moving on, and I don’t have much desire to rekindle it. I did think about it this morning which is a little weird from an esp standpoint. I was thinking about her. I was just thinking that maybe she was really waiting for me to call all weekend and then when I didn’t call til Sunday, she was probably pretty cheesed. I told her I had the kids, and it was Beauty and the Beast weekend. I was literally running all over the place for the entire weekend. There was nothing I could do. It’s tough. I’d like to at least meet up with the punk rock woman, and I can’t find a free minute. It’s crazy. I have the kids Monday and Wednesday, and then I have management training, and that will go late next Tuesday. I have something going next Thursday and I will mention that later. I think I also have practice next Thursday, so that means all weekend I’ll be playing the drums, when I’m not carting the kids all over town for football. It’s tough. Then I have Teenage bottlerocket on Sunday.

I have to touch on a topic here and I think it is fairly well established. There are dudes, friends that I hang out with, that are very good looking guys. In my opinion, hanging out with them sorta raises my stature in the eyes of any ladies who might be around. It’s like very good looking guy, pretty good looking guy with him, it sort of legitimizes you in a way. I’m not saying that I need to be legitimized (but I don’t think it hurts), I’m just saying that by association, you get raised up a notch. I have to ask a woman if this concept is sound, or if it’s irrelevant. It works for girls. A decent looking girl will get more looks if she is with a hot friend. It’s like you’ll check out the hottie and say “She’s out of my league…but her friend…” I can see that happening. The other thing about these dudes is that they are married, so they are off the market. They are perfect wingmen. This is an established concept, the wingman; it doesn’t hurt if your wingman is a good looking dude. That definitely helps. That’s all I’m saying. I think my buddy who balks at the idea of being legitimized is just interpreting it the wrong way. I’m not saying without them that we’re illegitimate, or that we don’t have a chance, I’m just saying that with them, we have a better chance. So anyway, yesterday I saw one of the guys walking down the sidewalk, so I stopped him for a chat. He had to go, and I was thinking about this concept and how I need to hang with these guys more. As I was thinking about this, I was smiling. I was walking across the street and somebody shouts, “Hey buddy!” It was the other guy who is the perfect wingman. I ran into both of them, randomly, in the span of about 2 minutes. Very odd. So anyway I’m going to see Teenage Bottlerocket with the 2nd guy on Sunday. That should be a blast.

Next Thursday I have a very, very important business meeting. This guy at work is in a theater group called Red Tape Theatre. I saw one of their shows and it was really good. The other day, the guy sent around a message that said the Theater was looking for board members. Basically you just attend the meetings, throw out ideas and help out. I really don’t know what you do. So I contacted the guy from the message and I am meeting with him and another dude next Thursday. I am already envisioning how this is going to go. To set the stage: the guys I’m meeting with are Paul and James. We are meeting at a starbucks.

Late Afternoon Starbucks, 3 men sitting on soft chairs.

Me: Thanks for meeting with me guys. I’m really excited about being a member of the Red Tape Theater board.

Paul: No worries dude. Thanks for the interest.

James: I think my latte is decaf.

Me: Ok guys, let’s talk Franchise.

Paul: Franchise?

James: This is definitely Decaf.

Me: You’ve heard of McDonalds right? I’m thinking about taking red tape theater global. We’ll sell Franchises. People will be able to stop in and get a little bit of theater for just a few hard-earned dollars. We’ll have a Shakespeare menu, Mamet, Greek tragedies, it will be a one stop shop. We can even have a happy meal type play for the kids.

Paul: Are you on the level?

Me: Which level? Like Mario Brothers?

James: I love the Wii.

Me: I bet you do.

Paul: I don’t like your idea, but I like the fact that you think outside of the box.

James: We abhor box-thinking.

Me: Ok guys, that was just an aperitif. Now let’s talk Turkey. Literally. Turkey. We can serve Turkey at the shows. People love Turkey and the L-tryptophan will make them too mellow to complain if the play sucks.

James: Like cold cuts?

Me: James, I’m glad you asked. Not cold cuts, this isn’t some dime store operation, we are going to have fully baked turkeys, just like on Thanksgiving. You come to the show, on the way to your seat you are handed a plate with a slab of fresh-cut Turkey breast on it.

Silence

Me: Your thoughts?

Paul: I’m an actor, and I’m actually speechless.

James: Look at the time. Oh dear me, I do have to run.

Paul: I better go with you. We can share a cab.

Me: So, should I expect a call?

Paul: Don’t call us, we’ll call you.

Me: Ok, cool. I prefer it that way. The ball’s in your court…s. See you.

Sorry about that. I kinda got carried away. I’m not sure how the meeting is going to go, but I really don’t think it’s going to go like the thing I just wrote.

I finally finished Atlas Shrugged. It was a book. It still is. It was a book that I hadn’t read. Now it’s a book that I have read. That’s about all. My walk to work went about 2 minutes quicker today cuz I don’t have the book in my backpack anymore. I started a new book today and I don’t think it’s going to take me 4 months to read like AS did. It’s Curt Cobain’s diary. I’m through about 30 pages and I really like it. It’s a much easier read than AS, and it’s basically photocopied pages right from his journal in sort of a workbook type of format. As you can imagine he has some stories, and it’s difficult to determine how much of the story is actually based in fact, the stories are good though. There’s also a lot of random shit strewn about in the journal, and that stuff is kind of annoying. The cartoons are good. He’s an amazing artist. There’s a picture of Eddy, the mascot of Iron Maiden in there and it has amazing detail. It’s hard for me to believe that Curt actually drew it. I don’t think they would put it in there if he didn’t. From reading the book, you can definitely tell that Curt is a smart guy; it’s weird because he’s so unrefined. His education is limited. I’m guessing he barely got out of high school. He has some very philosophical musings and he often makes cogent, coherent arguments about important topics. Then other times he’s just spewing out meaningless drivel and misspelling words. You really get an interesting glimpse at him and you can learn a lot if you care to.

I could talk about other stuff. I had dinner last night with a friend that I hadn’t seen in a while. I know he is very religious and takes his Christianity very seriously. It was fun and interesting. I think it’s interesting when people are very religious. I wonder what they are thinking and how they interpolate it all into their lives. We did talk a bit about God, Jesus and the Bible. It was funny because he mentioned the song 40, that is based on the Biblical psalm 40. He kept quoting from it and it was interesting. He said it meant a lot to him. I believe it. He did keep going back to a topic that amazingly very few people have mentioned to me, reconciling. He asked me a number of times whether I considered reconciling with my wife. I told him that we both had basically moved on. I think maybe one priest that I went to confession with, other than my friend, mentioned reconciliation. Even Priests were saying, “Ok, it’s over, do the best you can for the kids, try to part amicably.” For a while, every time I went to confession I thought I was going to get “a reconcile with your wife” speech and it never came. That’s weird. None of my friends or family (other than this friend) even consider it an option. Once I explained my reasoning for not reconciling, I think my friend was accepting of it. I dunno. It’s just interesting. Oh well. Big weekend ahead. Lot’s of running around. I’ll have more stories next week.

It takes a very steady hand...

2010-08-26T19:30:00.001-07:00

I really don’t feel like I have much to say right now. That has never stopped me before though. So here I go. I don’t know if this is embarrassing or what. I guess there is a story here that probably doesn’t need to be told. I’m going to tell it. Back in the day (4 months ago), I was in heavy communication with this girl and we were basically all lined up to bump uglies. She was sending me naked pictures and it was basically a lock. So anyway. I’m talking to her and she’s like, “Yeah, I was hooking up with this guy and I put my hand down his pants, he had like a forest down there, it was a total turn off.” I’m like, “Oh.” I had never trimmed my nether regions. Ever. I saw no need. Everyone I ever hooked with seemed fine with it. It was natural. It was my own personal shower-scrunchi. Well finally the day arrived when I was supposed to go to this girl’s place, so I broke down and weed-whacked my shower scrunchi. It was kind of a bummer, but it was rather nice and breezy as well. As luck would have it, I didn’t make it over to her place, then the whole thing fell apart (I had to diss her) and we never hooked. That was like 3 or 4 months ago when I trimmed back the shrub, and what do you know, it basically had grown back by last weekend. I decided to give it another trim. Last time I used these barber scissors that I had lying around, so I went with that again. Everything was going pretty well. When you trim, you def flirt with danger, especially when you are using scissors. Um yeah. Last time with the scissors. I was just putting the finishing touches on my new ‘do when I snipped myself. It sucked pretty bad. I wasn’t sure what was up, the skin down there is so thin that I thought it was gonna bleed like crazy. It didn’t. I tried putting a band-aid on it, but that really doesn’t work due to the varying stages of shrivel that occur down there. I just basically had to let it go. I wasn’t sure what was up, and I had white undies on. By the end of the day, there were some blood stains in the undies. I put Neosporin on it like crazy, cuz the worst case scenario would be to have it get infected. It scabbed over the next day and was basically back to normal. I think the scab fell off today, so it healed in like 4 days. That’s pretty amazing. That area does get a lot of blood flow though, so maybe that aids the healing process. Yeah. I’m going to have to find a new way to weedwhack my shower scrunchi, that’s for sure.

On to brighter topics. Well not really brighter, but the online dating thing is proving to be a frustrating venture. The one woman I really like, we had a good date, we had some good e-mails, well she really has fallen out of touch. She seems to have a lot of technical problems, with e-mail, phone and text, so basically I have no way to get in touch with her. It’s actually rather comical. She doesn’t answer e-mails, so she def doesn’t have computer access. She has sent me a couple of texts that usually begin “I’m so sorry” and end with a sob story about how one of her devices (cell phone) is not working correctly. As I write this, I realize how much the whole thing strains credulity. I know it really does. I don’t know what my choices are right now. On one hand, I could mentally just give it up and decide that even if she does get in touch, that we’re done. That would be closure. Or I could just chill and when she gets in touch, I can just say “Oh I know you’re busy, I’m busy too, no big deal.” I’m leaning towards that. There’s also the possibility that she never gets a hold of me and that we are done. Well last week I mentioned that I had 5 women in contact with me (not physically unfortunately) and well that number has dwindled. The woman who tried to line me up as a hook-up, she’s gone. No worries. The burlesque dancer never answered my second message to her, she was not a good match anyway. She gone. I had to give one of the punk rockers the diss. She wasn’t really attractive and she wanted me to call her. I just bailed on that. I did exchange messages with the other punk girl, but I haven’t put any time into that, and it’s probably fizzling. Although, I should probably try to line something up with her next week. I got winked at by an African American woman with huge boobs. She’s really cute. I sent her a message, but she didn’t respond. She might not be a match member, either that, or she just wised up. It did say that she was into music in her profile, her one example of this fact, Chicago. That’s pretty awesome. I mean on some level. It’s like if you go through your whole list of favorite artists, you boil it all down to Chicago. Good times.

I’ve got a busy weekend coming up starting tomorrow. The boys have football practice or scrimmages, I don’t know. They’ve got practice tomorrow night and then we are going to the local high school football game. That should be fun. On Saturday we have scrimmages, and then on Sunday I’m going to see Teenage Bottlerocket with my buddy. I’m pretty fired up for that. I don’t know much of TB’s stuff, but what I know I dig, and they def play the style of music I’m into (not really much like Chicago). That’s about it. Keep on rocking.

A lyrical joyride

2010-08-24T04:35:00.000-07:00

On OKCupid, one of the questions is “When you waste a whole day and do nothing, how do you feel?” When I waste a day and do nothing, I feel bad. I have so much stuff to do, writing, hanging with the kids, divorce stuff, work, reading, working out, playing the drums, etc. that wasting a day just doesn’t happen. To me, wasting a day is when I do stuff, but don’t get as much accomplished as I should have. I never have a day when I just do nothing. This last weekend was sorta like that for me though. I did a lot of stuff, but nothing major. I worked out every day. I practiced the drums every day. I also saw a couple of movies. I watched some sports, but it’s hard to watch the Sox implode and I don’t watch preseason football. I do have some interesting tidbits from the weekend, and without further ado, here they are.

Practicing the drums. I dunno what was up with drummers from the 80s/90s, but they loved to ride that hi-hat. I dunno what it’s called and I’m a drummer, but basically both sticks pummeling the hi-hat for the entire song. It’s tough. Throw in “Where the streets have no names” and you’ve got a workout. Ok. I got ahead of myself. I’m sort of in a new band. I say “sort of” because I haven’t practiced with them or met them, but it sounds like we have 4 solid players and we are ready to get this thing going. We have Thursdays mapped out as our practice day and I think we are gonna be practicing in Downers Grove, which is like 5 mins from my house. Much better than Park Forest, which was an hour each way. The other band was more serious, which meant that I was never gonna be an official member cuz I can’t go on tour and all that. I just wasn’t a good fit. This one is more like a hobby and that is perfect for me. So the guy that organized the whole thing put together a list of tunes and we all voted on our first 10 songs to learn for practice. We ended up with 14 songs to practice (over an hour of material). On Friday night I went through half the set, on Sat morning I went through the other half. Then on Sunday, I went for broke and went through the whole set non-stop. No mean feat. These songs are hard. Here’s the setlist:

Just like Honey: The Jesus and Mary Chain

With or Without You: U2

Where the Streets have no names: u2

Where is my mind: The pixies

Bittersweet Symphony: The verve

Lucky Man: The verve

Fake Plastic Trees: Radiohead

Ceremony: Joy Division

New Dawn Fades: Joy Division

I am the resurrection: Stone Roses

Pictures of You: The cure

Just like Heaven: The cure

Reptile: The church

Everyday is like Sunday: Morrissey

I’m not so sure about the Verve, but everything else on here kicks ass, and unfortunately most of the songs are really tough for me to play. That’s what practice is for I guess. I think I’ll get them with practice, but the chances of me screwing up live are like 100%. I don’t really care though. I’m def getting ahead of myself worrying about playing live, we gotta practice first. I’m way geeked about the songs though, and the guys seem cool. I think the band’s name should be 120 Minutes.

I had some time to kill on Saturday, I wanted to go see Sundowner, but that fell through. I ended up doing nothing. Well I knocked out a movie that I have been meaning to watch and was available on On Demand. The Deer Hunter. I had never seen it. This movie is over 3 hours. They don’t make movies like this anymore (some would say that’s a good thing). It was good. It was not a feel good movie, it’s the type of movie where you kinda feel like shit when you are done watching it, but it makes you think. I really wanted someone to talk about it with. I bet there is something online where you can go on and discuss movies. I should check that out, or start it up. I think I could write a 20 page paper on the movie, but right now, I don’t feel like I could do it justice by giving it just a cursory comment. It’s a powerful film and if you don’t like to be challenged by a film, then don’t see it. I had some issues with it, some continuity stuff that I’m surprised they messed up. Other than that, it was pretty amazing. De Niro was awesome, definitely a force to be reckoned with.

I ended up with some free time on Sunday night. I was doing Laundry, so I decided to check out another movie. I felt like I crossed a classic off my list and I wanted to do the same thing again. I searched through On Demand, and all I could come up with was…Yentl. I really thought I was gonna hate Yentl, I told myself that if after the first hour I was into it, I would turn it off. I ended up really liking it. I had no idea it was a musical. The songs were not very catchy. The performances were pretty solid, the story was really good. Some of the situations that Yentl got into really blew my mind. They were just things that I never would’ve thought of. It made me really think about screenwriting. How to create a character that will appeal to a wide audience. Well, you have to create the character, suck the audience in, and then put the character in trying situations with difficult choices. That’s all Yentl was, and it worked.

This crap is all boring though. Not much on the dating tip. All I can say is that I stumbled across this profile. It speaks for itself. I did not contact the person. The profile included a pic of the woman naked except for panties. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest and her face obscured by the camera. I think it’s real. Happy reading. I cut and pasted the profile for your reading pleasure below:

At the end of the Kafka story "A Hunger Artist," the title character confesses that he would have eaten, if only he could have found a food that satisfied him. That line is resonating with me, because I am starving, but lately I have not been able to find a food that satisfies me. Save me from making a performance of renunciation by giving me the food I need.

I need you to take me in hand as soon as we meet, to speak to me in low, even tones, to tell me what you'll do to me, what I'll do for you, to let me know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are alpha animal and I am beta, to hold down my hands as you bring my drink to my lips, to take me in a corner where we hope no one will see and tilt my head back and put your fingers deep in my mouth. I need you to take me to your house and hold me and control me. I need you to hurt me, but I need you to know how to hurt me. I need you to bring me to where too much suddenly isn't. I need to be babied and fed and comforted. And I need to be fucked.

Please.

And please, tell me what you want. I could tell you stories of my past lovers, how hard I've worked for them, how I've pushed myself to give them everything they needed, how loving and accepting I've been. Of course, I can only be that for you if you are that for me. And it all comes with time. First, I need to be fucked.

I don't like the words "slave" and "master"; "master" I will call you if it's what you prefer or demand, but I am no one's slave. I prefer "submissive." I will not pretend that I want nothing but to devote myself to someone who doesn't make me feel well-attended to. I am a hungry pet who'll have a lot of gratitude for the man who feeds me, but I would not describe my motto as "I live to serve." I live for a warm, reciprocal relationship in which both of us get what we need. That said, when inspired, enthralled, or in love, I am a very good girl, and depending on the way our relationship developed, I could be willing to be obedient in many settings, not just in bed.

I'm height weight proportionate, in good physical shape, tallish, size 6, small breasts, strong legs, round ass. I have a lovely face with large eyes and prominent features, a farmer's fair daughter type. Pictures of my face make an excellent case for fucking me, and I will send them if you contact me.

Edited by

I’m looking for

· Guys and girls who like bi girls

· Ages 25-46

· Near me

· Who are single

· For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

·

You should message me if

Someone asked me recently what turned me on in a lover, and I said: physical strength; a low, regular voice giving me orders; a warm, animal smell; bravery; the uninhibited expression of love, or at least affection, depending on our relationship; self-control; deep and manifest acceptance of and appreciation for my body and everything it does; rhythm; creativity and a thirst for variety; tenderness; intuition for what's going on in my body and mind without me having to say too much; patience; and of course, intelligence expressed verbally. That last is crucial. You'll use your words to structure our experience; I want to know you can make them transport me.

Illicit Cheese

2010-08-20T16:30:00.000-07:00

I’ve got stuff to talk about today and I don’t know where to begin. I’m reading Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand and I’ve got about 100 pages left of 1170. I’m in the home stretch. It’s not bad. The problem for me is that Rand basically crafted this piece of fiction as a vehicle to expound her political beliefs. Definitely not the first time this has been done, but the first few 100 times it was done, it was done better. In the Fountainhead, the novel was character driven. I would say AS is more political dogma driven and the characters are just vehicles to this purpose. That is my one huge issue with the book. That was until I got to “the speech.” I don’t want to spoil the book for someone who may want to read it (or the movie which I think is in production). Suffice to say, there is a speech at the end of the book and to put it mildly, getting through it was excruciating. I’m through it, bring on the denouement. (spelled right the first time, I’m good!) Ok, so I’m reading through this speech and randomly interspersed in the text is the phrase “blank-out,” sometimes it appears as blanks-out. I can’t figure out what that means. I can’t decide if the publisher was somehow censoring certain words or if it’s just part of the speech. Seriously, when blank-outs appear, it seems totally nonsensical from the context. I have no desire to go back and figure it out and a google search was useless as well. It’s annoying and totally baffling. On deck, I’ve got Kurt Cobain’s diary. Hopefully there are no blank-outs in that.

I had a couple more things to mention about Lolla. I totally forgot to talk about the concessions. I didn’t consume that much there, at least I tried not to, but I was shocked at how reasonably everything was priced. A quarter of a lou Malnati’s small pizza was $3. That was the bargain for me. I pretty much subsisted on Lou’s cheese pizza the whole weekend. That was a good thing. I also had a pulled pork sandwich, that might’ve been three bucks, and a mini meatball sandwich was 2 or 3 bucks. I think a can of beer was 4 bucks. Water was 2 bucks and you only had to buy 1 cuz you could refill at any of the water stations located around the park. I don’t think T shirts were a good deal, but I have so many Ts and they are such a waste. I can really only bring myself to buy a T if it’s $10 and the money is going to a band that needs it. Overall, logistically, financially, sonically, the experience inside Lolla was very pleasant. The crowds weren’t too bad either. Foot traffic made it a little tough to get from one side to the other, but other than that, the crowds weren’t overwhelming.

Ok. Now to the good stuff. I’ve been chomping at the bit to get to the crazy dating night I had last night. Well all online. It started rather innocently with an IM exchange with the girl I mentioned yesterday who I hadn’t made time for. I sent her an IM at about 6 or so, and I was surprised to get a quick response. She was responding from her cell phone. Kinda crazy, she seemed up for talking whereas I wouldn’t have been if someone was IMing me on my cell. I don’t even know how to set that up. We chatted for a while, it went pretty well. She works in Oak Brook, which is a stone’s throw from where I live. I told her we def need to grab a beer sometime to which she replied, “After a day like today, I need some booze!” Guess she had a tough day. Eventually the connection got all messed and I wanted to go for a run, so I did that. This girl is also into punk, so we have something in common there, we’ll see. There’s another girl who messaged me off of match, she’s into punk too, but I can’t decide if she might be mildly mentally challenged. Safe to say I’m not that interested in her. There’s another girl who is into burlesque and open relationships, I had a message thing going with her and she bailed, I dunno what I said, she was cute though. I have no idea what I did to start garnering all this attention, like I said before, maybe some women are trying to line up foot-warmers for the winter, and they are starting early.

There’s one woman who checked out my profile on Match, I had checked out her profile as well, and I just can’t bring myself to message her. I can’t do it, because there is only one thing I want to say, and I’ll get to that later. On her profile she has like 14 pictures and among these pictures are: a pic of her scuba diving, a pic of her deep sea fishing, a pic of the giant marlin she apparently caught, a pic of her on a snowmobile, a pic of her running in a race, a pic of her skiing, a pic of her apparently landing after skydiving, a pic of her at a cubs game, and a pic of her somewhere tropical. She’s really cute, she looks great in all the pix, but I dunno, she just seems too active for me. If I messaged her, it would probably go something like this, “I like your profile, you seem really active. Don’t take this the wrong way, I’m not trying to be a jerk. I just think it would be funny if you somehow got a picture of yourself in a spacesuit as if you had just landed on the moon. You might have to go to the Smithsonian to get something like that, but it would be absolutely awesome.” I dunno. I tried to think of other things to send her, but I can’t in good conscience send her a message without mentioning the fact that she has a million crazy-active interests. I mean who would be a good match for her? Jacques Cousteau? James Bond?

I saved the best for last, I had a first last night (that sounded confusing). I should’ve been in bed, as all good boys should before 10. Instead I was back on OKCupid. I was reading somebody’s journal entry that was really pathetic. It was sad. Then a window popped up and somebody had instant messaged me; first time for that, I don’t even know how to send someone else an instant message. She said hi, I said hi. She said she was at some concert. I always assume the best, so I’m thinking it was someone good, she says she was in Hinsdale (a town close to me, and her, she’s in LaGrange). She saw the band 7th heaven. I surmised from the discussion that she had a few drinks. She was all like, “I didn’t want to come home.” I’m like, “ok.” She sounded like she was all amped up, but out of nowhere she says, “I’m tired, I’m going to bed.” And that was it. So a few minutes later I went and checked out her profile. She was not attractive, but not awful, and quite possibly mentally challenged. Her profile indicated that she was still on line. I’m naïve. I know it, and I accept it. I was way slow on the uptake there, she was looking for a hookup. She wanted someone to meet her out and who knows what. She bailed on me (I def was not going to go out, I ran, and didn’t eat dinner, bed was calling). I’m sure she moved on to find some other dude to hook with. That’s the story. Pretty weird. Lotsa crazy stuff in this day and age

Useless Drivel

2010-08-19T16:23:00.000-07:00

Every once in a while I get a wild hair up my butt and I actually seriously consider going to law school. It happened today and I wish someone would beat me up to make it go away. I can think of some good reasons to get a JD (Juris Doctorate, aka Law degree), but going deep into debt to do it is not one of them. A lot of chief compliance officers have JDs. I don’t think they all do; the ones that don’t probably have a shitload of experience in Finance, which imho I do. I’m thinking that I could really progress in my career with a JD. I’m also thinking that taking 3 years to get a JD might not be the best way to spend my time right now. It’s a conundrum for me. On one hand, I want to be a writer, I want to write screenplays, I want to be a creator. Those are dreams (or one dream, I guess), on the other hand I want to be successful and wealthy I guess, and maybe getting a JD and moving up the ladder in my current career is a way to do that. Obviously going to Law School sorta cuts into free time for other things like work, family, writing, breathing. Like I said, it’s a passing thing, like a cold. It will go away soon.

What won’t go away is the ragweed pollen in the air. I hate that shit. It messes me up for sure. The other day my eyes were itchy and I thought “what month is it?” Early Aug? Ragweed. The last few years I haven’t gotten it that bad, but this year might be different. I gotta make sure I’m all stocked up on Allegra. That stuff works great for me, it knocks it right out.

I came to an interesting conclusion today about online dating and stuff. There’s this one woman who I’m kinda interested in, and kinda not. We exchanged information and we are supposed to chat sometime online, that was last week. It’s tough. The kids take a lot of your time. Last weekend was a whirlwind for me, I didn’t have time to get in touch with anybody. The one woman bailed (I mentioned yesterday) probably because of that, I told her I would call her over the weekend. I called her Sunday night. She didn’t answer, and I was glad cuz I could leave a message and fulfill my obligation. Anyway, this other woman I tried to instant message her a couple of times, and we just haven’t made the connection. I sent her an e-mail and said “let’s pick a time and get this chat going.” The fact of the matter is that I’m not that interested in her, and I’m not really making time for her. This is all well and good, but the question is, could this be applied to other people I’m in contact with, who don’t seem to be making time for me? Interesante. I don’t know the answer, it’s definitely possible, and I firmly believe that if someone is interested in you, they will make the time to stay in touch. It’s weird, I don’t know if it’s gamesmanship, but sometimes people just don’t get back to you. It’s all just up in the air. I guess it’s just the reality of it, you just have to be patient and wait it out.

Weird thing. I’m walking down the train platform and I’m sorta just wanting to be left alone, like I always am in the morning on the way to work. I’m never up for a casual chat with someone I don’t know, I just want to chill. I’m walking down the platform and I see an old couple who are long time friends of my parents. I could’ve easily just walked on by. I didn’t. I stopped, confirmed they were who I thought they were (there was no doubt, just an ice breaker) and introduced myself. I talked to them for the 5 minutes before the train arrived. It was really nice. The guy went to Northwestern and used to get us tickets for the NW hoops games sometimes. It looked like they were going on a trip, so I inquired about that. Dude was going on a trip to the hospital to get a growth removed from his colon. Not sure if they were removing the growth or part of his colon. Neither one sounds like a good time. He said it was a routine procedure and that the growth was benign. Ok. It was nice catching up with them. I def feel like I’m taking more chances and just doing the right thing more. I dunno if it’s because of the dating or what, but I feel like I’m becoming a bit more outgoing, and it’s not bad.

Miscellany

2010-08-19T05:51:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was definitely a survival day for me. A couple of months ago, during the World Cup, I went out during the week. I can’t remember where I went. The next day at work I didn’t feel too good. Well I felt fine in the morning, but then by around noon, I felt like complete ass and was just stupid messed the rest of the day. I was a little concerned that would happen to me yesterday. I was working on limited sleep (4 hours) and I had to attend a conference with some of my superiors. I ate some breakfast, an English muffin and some fruit. That stayed down ok. For lunch I choked down half a sandwich and ate a banana. Right around conference time, I was feeling pretty good, no delayed repercussions like last time. We went to the conference, and I was really worried that the lack of sleep would catch up with me and I would be nodding off in front of everybody. I actually remained pretty chipper. As far as surviving goes, I did a great job. I’m actually kinda proud of myself for pulling it off. I slept like a rock last night, woke up this morning and worked out; back on track. I don’t know how I made it through that conference. It shocks me that people who reach high levels in any industry, the financial industry in this case, don’t have the ability to speak to a crowd. These guys were mumbling, they were ill-prepared, they were slouching. It’s brutal to have to sit through that. The organizers should know this and at least get some visual aids going and get someone moving around. Watching 7 old people sitting at a table gurgling into a microphone gets old pretty quick. I know it’s dry subject matter, but couldn’t they at least try to spruce it up? In the e-mailed itinerary for the conference, they don’t mention swaps once. Well the whole conference was about swaps. I think swaps affect maybe like 10 percent of the people in the room, and that was all they talked about. When I heard swap I was like, “not our business” and I turned my brain off. I had to fight to turn it back on, just to make it through. I’m sure I got something out of the experience, the cookie was good. Fiji water is so tasty. Fiji is def my new favorite water.

On the dating tip, it’s a crazy world out there for sure. I’ve got people coming and going, and people who I thought were gone coming back, it’s a mess. It’s fun to talk to the people and exchange messages, but I don’t see any dates coming soon. I hope I’m wrong. One woman gave me the diss while I was at the Interpol show. We had never even met, and she’s like “I’m just not sure I can handle the fact that you have 3 kids.” She went into more detail and the text was really long (ATT had to break it into 2 parts). I just texted back, “Thx, good luck to you.” I was gonna text something like, “You’re a special girl, I totally understand, you’ll find what you’re looking for, Don’t settle, etc.” I thought that might make her feel bad, if I said too much. I thought, short and simple would be easiest for her, and she won’t regret the decision (well obviously she’ll regret the decision, I’m fairly certain that all of the women that have dissed me so far will come to regret the decision.) That’s me though, I’m supposed to think that way, aren’t I? I thought that was a little odd though, cuz she winked at me, and my profile says I have three kids. Moving on. I was going through some profiles of suggestions on OK Cupid. One of them was a girl I’ve seen before. She’s very indie, punk rock looking, I think she has green hair in one pic. She’s not bad looking. 26. A little young. She’s not shy about the fact that she likes sex. Which is cool. A lot of people on OKC put sex as one of the 6 things they can’t live without. Most would agree. In this girl’s profile under deepest secret I’m willing to admit, she has: “I LOVE ANAL!!!!!!!” You would think that it was a joke, or that someone got a hold of her profile and messed with it, but I don’t think that’s the case. She’s online regularly; everything else about her profile seems legit. I just think she likes anal, and is obviously quite open about it. I really could say more about this, but I think it would be best to leave it at that. I know you’re wondering if I contacted her, I did not. Too young and I’m not interested in a purely sexual relationship right now.

Half the fun of going to a show is the pre party. I think the anticipation is the best part. The rock is good, although quite often, the actual event does not live up to expectations. I try to keep my expectations to a minimum to combat this effect. Before Interpol, I cruised over to my buddy’s place and his brother showed up later. It was a good time, prolly as fun as the show. The reason we were late for the show was cuz I think we were having too much fun sitting around and listening to records. I was basically playing dj all night, then my buddy says, “I want to hear london by the Smiths.” I was like, “I’m not sure I have it.” Then I started picking through my vinyl, and I pulled out a Smiths record that I prolly haven’t listened to in like 5 or more years. Shoplifters of the World. It’s basically a single that’s the size of a full record (12”). What do you know, London is on there. We listened to the whole thing and man did it bring back some good memories. I prolly bought that record when I was 17. Immediately I thought it’s prolly worth money. I dunno how much it’s worth. It has a picture of Elvis on the jacket. I saw one on ebay for like 100 bucks, that had a flaw or something. I’m not gonna sell it anyway.

On the music tip, there’s a band playing tomorrow night that I kinda wanna see. Neutral Uke Hotel. They basically play Neutral Milk Hotel songs and the guy plays ukulele. I dunno. I listened to them on youtube and they sounded ok. I’d like to check them. I was wondering when someone would throw together a NMH tribute. I’m not wondering anymore. There’s another band playing on Saturday I’d like to check. Sundowner. It’s basically Chris from the Lawrence Arms. I’m sure he’ll play some TLA stuff, so def worth checking. Lots of other stuff on the horizon. The national, Jimmy Eat World, The methadones, Riot Fest, lot’s of rock. Also College Football, Pro Football, kiddie football. I’m gonna be busy. Busy is good.

So Very Tired

2010-08-17T19:42:00.001-07:00

Interpol last night. Good show. I was gonna say that I don’t get it, but I really do get it. Bands come out earlier during the week. I thought I learned my lesson at the Pretenders. The last night of their stay in Chicago, they have to get on the road, it’s Monday. It all adds up to grabbing the cash and getting your dash on. The show was supposed to start at 730 with one opener. You figure they will play a half hour, a half hour to set up for Interpol, and Interpol will come on around 9. We get there at 9 and the band is on the stage. The guy at the door said they had been on for 20 mins, I think it was more like a half hour. We were there like 38 minutes and they left the stage and said thank you. For the mathematically challenged, that was 9 effin 38 at night. They did two encores and were done by 10. WTF?! I was thinking more like 9 to 11. I dunno where they have to go, but like I said, they got paid. They didn’t cheat the crowd, they just came out really early. Hopefully I learned my lesson with this one. The other lesson I learned is that just because the waitress buys you a shot of Jack, doesn’t mean you have to do it. What was with that? Both waitresses came over to our table to do a shot with us. Did they think it was our birthday (collectively?) Def wish I had a do-over on that one. I feel pretty ok. I think I would feel fine if I hadn’t had the shot. And if I had gotten to bed before 2.

On to other news. So I finally scraped together the stones to find out what somebody’s deal was. It wasn’t the PDA couple, although I did see them yesterday. It wasn’t the guy with the walker, he’s on deck though. It also wasn’t the most sexually fulfilled couple on Earth, but I did see them today. Hadn’t seen them in a while. It was actually someone I haven’t mentioned before. I don’t think. There is this African American gentleman who has a suped-up wheelchair and he cruises around my neighborhood. I think our neighborhood is fairly culturally diverse (not really), but I don’t think this goes over well with the neighbors. The guy likes to ride his wheelchair in the street, much to the chagrin of the Porsches and Benzes trying to get to Whole Foods. I’ve seen the guy around, he wears a maroon baseball hat and just cruises basically. I totally wanted to know what his deal was. So I’m at my kid’s football practice. I’ve got the windows open in my car and I’m waiting for practice to end. The dude goes cruising by and he says “hi” or something. I was surprised cuz I wasn’t even looking in that direction, so I said “hey.” He had already zipped by though. Then I had to move my car. I saw the dude riding his wheelchair offroad through the grass by the pond. Finally I just thought “screw it.” I got out of the car and waited for the dude to drive up. Physically the guy’s deal is that he is missing one leg right in the middle of the thigh. Other than that, he looks pretty normal. He’s not obese or anything. He’s cruising through the grass and he’s about 5 feet away and I say, “That’s quite an all terrain vehicle you’ve got there.” He stutters out, “I I I wwas jjust down feeding the ducks. They see me coming.” I say, “I bet, they probably recognize you.” He says, “yyeah yeah, they ddo.” Then we chatted a little bit about the weather. He was saying how he needs to get out and cruise around before Winter comes and he’s all cooped up. I get that. He seemed fairly with it, tough to say if he is mentally challenged or not. It was a nice chat, then he motored on out. I was pretty pleased with myself for making the move. That’s one down and I guess 2 to go.

I'm just a blurb

2010-08-13T16:18:00.001-07:00

All the grass over by where Lollapalooza happened is dead. I don’t get that. How could three days of people trampling kill the grass? I can see it from my office and it’s all brown though. It was only 3 days, maybe the rock killed it. I really don’t think the rock was either bad enough to kill the grass, or bad-ass enough to kill the grass. I’m trying to think of acts that I saw that may have killed the grass. Seriously, from a bad-ass perspective, nobody killed the grass last weekend. I can’t think of a group that brought it so hard that the grass would die. Nobody is coming to mind. The only band I can think of that might have killed the grass from sucking is Grizzly Bear, and they did play over where the grass appears dead. I meant to put together a list of bands best to worst for each day. I guess now would be an appropriate time for that.

Day 1

Dragonette

Green Day

Against me

AFI

Social D

The soft pack

Royal Bangs

Edward sharpe

Stars

The morning benders

Gogol bordello

Harlem

Rogue wave

Slightly Stoopid

Dawes

Grizzly bear

Day2

Hockey

Soundgarden

The National

Wolfmother

MGMT

Cypress Hill

Mutemath

Yeasayer

I dunno what it is, but I’ve been getting a lot of messages lately on my dating sites. One of them is actually promising, which I think I mentioned in another blog. I dunno what the sudden influx in interest can be ascribed to. I haven’t changed anything. I haven’t posted a journal entry, I should do that, that always generates some traffic. All I can think of is that once fall comes around, people hunker down for winter. I’m thinking that women are looking to lock up a snuggle buddy for the long winter ahead. I know it’s early to be talking Winter, especially when it’s like 90 out every day, but this is just a theory. If the theory holds, then interest should continue to ramp up into early fall, aka crunch time. I’m personally not too concerned about lining up a snuggle buddy, especially if I have to settle in order to do it. Definitely not worth settling just to have a foot warmer for the winter, but I’m not a woman, so who knows, maybe women are looking for footwarmers this time of year. Or maybe my intelligence, boyish good looks, and ample charm are finally breaking through and word is getting out about the best catch out there. That could be it too.

TWisting faded memories

2010-08-12T17:40:00.001-07:00

The last few days I’ve been thinking about the past. A couple of funnyish things. I have no idea why I was thinking about these things. I guess cuz my mind wanted to.

When I was like 11 or 12, I think it was Summer. My brother who was about 16 at the time was playing softball down at the fields near our house. I was invited to play. My brother included me in everything when I was a kid and that really shaped who I am today. It was cool hanging with him and his friends. I hung out with these guys; I learned from these guys, I idolized these guys. They were all really cool to me. So I was very excited about hanging out with them and playing softball. I don’t think the game had been going on that long. I was hanging out in the outfield or something. I think I was in the infield. Well this guy comes up to bat and he had kind of a pointy head. Not like crazy pointy, but pointy enough to notice. One of my brother’s friends says to me, “Tell him to ‘give it up missile-head.’” Making fun of people then was not my style, it certainly isn’t my style now, but this guy pressured me into it. So I said it. The guy said something like “shut up” back to me. The guy by me goes “say it again.” So I said it again. The guy batting, the guy with the pointy head says “If you say that one more time, I’m gonna do something about it.” Or something like that. These guys are 16, I’m just like 11, so the guy next to me says “say it again, we’ve got your back.” So I said it again. The guy drops the bat and comes running out after me. I got ready to fight him, but he pulled some Ninja move on me, put his foot behind mine and then pushed me over it. I fell on my ass, felt like shit, started bawling and ran home. I dunno what happened to the guy, but I’m pretty sure he was universally ostracized over that move. I have no idea what the point of that story is. When I think about that guy, I think, “man, I bet he wishes he could go back and undo that.” I wish I could go back and not say that shit, cuz that’s not like me. I’ve done a lot of things that I wish I could undo, I guess that’s life. You have to live with the decisions you make.

So let’s get onto a story where I don’t come off looking like a puss. I’m waiting for the train today and a guy walks by that I recognize. I used to trade in the same trading crowd with him back in the day. I dunno what it is about trading, but a lot of guys who are complete dweebs develop some kind of hard-ass mentality, sometimes those guys get called out. This guy was one of those guys. When I started out on the floor I was with a firm that didn’t get a lot of respect. I was trading, but I was using a machine and I was just there basically to take money out of the other traders’ pockets, so not only did I get zero respect, but people resented me on top of it. I used to bring a newspaper in every day and read it over the course of the day. I used to leave it out so anyone could read it. I get back from lunch and I don’t know, this guy prolly had been getting on my nerves for other reasons, anyway he was reading my paper. He was sorta taking his time. Finally I walked up to him and I said, “Give me my newspaper, I want to read it.” He says, “I’m not done with it.” So I say, “If you don’t give that newspaper, I’m gonna take it, roll it up, and jam it in your ass.” He gave me the newspaper. Sometimes on the floor you had to do shit like that just to show everyone around you that they couldn’t just walk all over you. Good times. I see the guy around. I say hi. I mean we traded together. I let bygones be bygones, but whenever I see him, I always think of that incident.

I thought I had some other stuff to talk about. Not much on the online dating front. I did talk to a woman last night. That was fun. It was a good chat. We talked a little about our exes and stuff. It was funny cuz on my profile, it says divorced. Well I’m not divorced yet, but will be hopefully soon. This usually comes up fairly early in conversations or first dates, just to get it out of the way. I’m a full disclosure kind of guy. So I told her the truth that I’m not divorced yet. Usually that’s enough. The last date I went on, the woman wasn’t divorced yet either. Way back I was IMing a woman and the same thing, she wasn’t divorced yet. It’s not like I’m the only one. Let’s face it, separated is kind of a turn off, it implies that you might get back together with your ex. I’m not getting back together with my ex, so divorced is the right choice. Well last night this woman asks, “why do you put divorced on your profile if you are separated?” So I break it down and go into a little detail about how we’ve been separated for almost two years, that the divorce has been going on for a year and a half almost, etc. The she says, “yeah, I usually don’t have any interest in people who are separated.” Case and point why you don’t put it down, I’d rather have the chance to talk my way out of it than to be dismissed out of hand. She went on to say that she can see how my situation is different, and that she’s still interested. It’s just like, chalk one up for not putting separated. That was just one little snippet and it was an issue we had to deal with, so that was good to get it out of the way. We talked a lot about online dating. It’s really a crazy concept. The stuff that the women have to deal with is crazy. Well not that surprising, basically that most of the guys that contact her are just trying to hook up. I was telling her that I think it’s worse on OKCupid. I think that there are some real freaks on OKC, at least that’s what the girl I took to the Gage was telling me.

I guess bands don’t have to wait long after Lolla to come back to Chicago. Which is good, I mean once Lolla is over, who cares right? I dunno, I guess part of the point of Lolla is to get people in there cuz they think they won’t be able to see X band for a few months. If that notion is challenged, it could affect ticket sales in the future. I’m guessing it’s built into some of the contracts, probably for the headliners. Well the bands that are coming back are The National, Social Distortion, The New Pornographers and Mumford and sons. I would def like to catch the National, I don’t think I want to see Social D again. I’ve seen them a bunch of times and I’m ready to move on.

Mule got lame

2010-08-12T17:36:00.000-07:00

Lolla is in the books. I think I covered all of the relevant goings on. One thing I failed to mention is that there was a dude, going around shirtless, that had shaved his chest/body hair into an arrow that pointed down at his peni. That was kinda funny. Also sorta lame and pathetic. I dunno, who knows about these kids today. You would think that after a long weekend baking in the sun at Lolla, that I would just want to cruise home on Monday after work and crash. If you thought this, you would be absolutely right. Well, no such luck. My car has this problem where it dies out at random times. I usually just throw it in neutral, put on the hazards and get it started again. Well whatever problem causes this reared its head on Monday night and my roll and start didn’t work. I ended up on the side of the road with a dead battery. It was like 90 degrees out, so I had that going for me. I called the Illinois department of transportation (IDOT) to get a tow truck out. Well they came out and basically took me and my car to a bad neighborhood right off the highway and left me there. Thanks IDOT, for all that you do. I called Allstate and they sent out a tow truck, they said it would be out in 2 hours. I told them, “In 2 hours, I’ll probably be dead.” Well the people in india do the best they can to help some sad sap in Chicago, but they really don’t have a lot of sympathy I’m sure. So I waited there. I couldn’t lock myself in the car cuz when I had the door closed it was like 100 degrees in there. So I just sat there on some sidestreet with the door open. I got some interesting looks. A couple of cars went around the block and I thought they were creepin on a comeup. They weren’t though. Just as dusk was fading into night, the tow truck, like a beacon of hope, appeared in my rearview mirror. They towed me out of there and left me by a service station in Willowbrook. I had them look at the car. They replaced the battery and alternator, which helped them determine that neither of those things was causing the problem. I guess it’s my ignition switch. What a pain. The thing is on recall, but Acura says I already had the recall work done. I said, “Did they recall the recall? Cuz it’s not working.” I think I’m SOL with Acura. The guy in willowbrook says he can fix it, he just needs to borrow Spicoli’s dad’s tools.

Car troubles. That’s no good. I was thinking about dating the other day. I consulted some ladies that we hung out with at Lolla and got some insight. One of them said that in order to get a girl, you have to be kind of a dick; that women are into the chase and you have to be mysterious to them in order to get them to like you. It’s sorta like the old three day rule. Where you wait three days before you call the girl or whatever. When you think about it, it’s actually counter-intuitive. In order to get a girl to like you, you have to act like you don’t like her. Really?! That’s the attitude though and I have already admitted freely that I don’t have the attitude. I really don’t want to become an asshole. I’m happy with who I am. I don’t think I’m exactly a creampuff all the time, it’s just that I’m pretty laid back, and honesty is really important to me. It’s also important to me to keep things as simple as possible all the time. That’s why I don’t (or rarely) lie, because I don’t want to complicate things (there are other reasons too). It’s the same thing with stupid games, I just don’t want to have to jump through all of these hoops and pretend I’m something I’m not.

Speaking of something I’m not, I’m not in a band anymore. I used to be a punk rocker, now I’m just a suburban dad. So sad. Yeah. Well I guess the band wants to go on tour. Which is cool. I’m very excited for them and it rocks that they are getting out there and bringing the music to the people. But yeah, they told me that I wasn’t a good fit cuz I’m a nerd and not a punk. Well they didn’t put it like that, but that’s kinda what it boiled down to. Or are punks nerds? I think some punks are nerds that just got angry. Maybe I’m not enough of a nerd. Or I’m not angry enough. I think I’m just too normal, and I def can’t quit my job and drive across the country in a van (as appealing as that sounds). They sent me a very polite e-mail and thanked me for my enthusiasm and punctuality. I wish them the best; I really like the music, so I think they have a chance of catching on, if things break right for them. I hope it works out. Hopefully they won’t get into too many fights or run into the issues that have held them back in the past. I def want to check them out live. I think they are playing the Elbo Room on the 21st. Sundowner is also playing that night though, and I’d like to see them too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOpch8lVjHI

Lollapalooza Day 3

2010-08-11T16:38:00.001-07:00

Ok. I better get to day 2 of Lolla before I just plain forget everything and move on. Lord knows I’ve got other news and goodies for you, but I want to get Lolla nailed down first. After the first night of Lolla, I was hoping that someone would be out selling their wristband and I could get one for like $20. Didn’t happen. I didn’t see anyone trying to sell a wristband and I really didn’t feel like standing there shouting out for people to sell me their wristband. Sunday rolls around. I get up, work out, hang out. My buddy gets up. We go grab some breakfast. We get back from brekkie and I’m about in a food coma. My buddy lays down on the couch and pulls a blanket over himself. I’m thinking he’s out. I had some other friends from High School that I promised I would meet at Lolla on Sunday. I wasn’t going to let them down. I also really wanted to see Hockey. Some time around 2, I told my buddy I was gonna roll. He’s like, ok I’ll come. Shocker. Very cool though. We cruised down to get tix and much like the previous day, no one was selling. Finally we stumbled upon some dude who was selling print outs for $60. He seemed legit. I asked him if he would walk us up to the gate (to prove the printout wasn’t a dupe). He said “no.” The he goes, “I’m a ticket broker, these are real. Do you want to take a picture of my driver’s license?” I was like, “no, not really.” So we bought the printouts and they worked. We cruised in and Minus the Bear was playing over on the south side, whereas Hockey were supposed to play up north. We went straight to Hockey.

The sun was just pounding down on us, so we managed to get a decent vantage point in the shade. We chilled there. Got a free show. Some woman with ginormous boobs was slathering sunscreen all over them in plain view of the crowd. Good times. Once Hockey started playing, she was jumping around so much I thought she was gonna injure herself or someone else due to the outrageous flopping. Def a good show. Hockey was solid too. They played all the stuff you’d expect, and some new stuff that wasn’t bad. I would put Hockey up there as one of my favorite performances of the whole fest. After Hockey, we had a short walk over to Yeasayer, so we went and checked them. I’ve listened to Yeasayer before and they get a lot of buzz, but they never did much for me (I would def be into them if they did my laundry or something). YS was ok. I have to admit that their closing song was good, and I may go online and try to figure out what it was. We stuck around in the same spot to check out Mutemath. This hour of the fest would’ve been so much better if The National, Wolfmother, MGMT, or Cypress Hill were playing. It was a lost hour and if any of those bands were playing, I would’ve avoided the major conflict that the rest of the show embodied. MM were good. They played rock. I thought that I didn’t like them cuz I thought they were Math Rock, and I really don’t like Math rock. I think I had Mutemath confused with Mogwai. Mm was good though and I might check out their stuff online. We bolted early from MM to run to the South stage to catch Wolfmother. The rest of the concert was a major frustration for me (until soundgarden anyway) cuz I wanted to see all of the bands and I just couldn’t bilocate even though I tried really hard. Wolfmother rock, they have like 5 songs that I know, but the one I really like is Woman. Well 15 minutes into the set they played Woman. After that, I was basically free to go. So I decided to run to the other stage, catch some of MGMT, See some of The National, then come back for Soundgarden.

We got to MGMT and they were just finishing up some crappy new song. Then they kicked into Kids which was really good, and the crowd went apeshit for it. That was cool. MGMT closed with some crappy new tune. Then we bolted over to the National. The National’s new record is uber mellow. I’m not really into crazy slow mellow stuff like that. But live I thought it was pretty kick ass. The only National album I have is Alligator. My fave tunes are Abel and Karen. I was hoping to catch Abel, cuz I knew they’d play it. The national is also one of those bands that will play their most popular song whenever, not necessarily at the end. Alas, we had to bolt to catch Soundgarden. The Nat played abel, but I missed it.

Soundgarden. We got back a few minutes before Soundgarden came out, we managed to meet up with our friends and we were all systems go. When Soundgarden played their first reunion show, back in Seattle in April, they busted out Beyond the Wheel. If you know the song BTW, you know it’s the song in which Chris Cornell wails like a motherfucking banshee on crack. SG posted footage from the Seattle show on their website and their performance of BTW just blew me away. It was like CC hadn’t aged in 20 years. Let’s go into the time machine. It’s 1990, I was into Soundgarden when they first came out, I was cool like that. I liked that it was metal but it wasn’t, it was punk but it wasn’t, it was grunge. Whatever, so SG came to Chicago and they opened for Danzig. The show was at the Riviera in Chicago, and I couldn’t get anyone to go. There was no way I was gonna miss it, so I went alone. I had to know if Cornell could hit those notes in person, if he could replicate the wail. I was blown away. He was hitting the notes higher than on the record. He was like a vocal freak. It was amazing. I’m just laying the foundation, cuz we’ve got a vocal freak on our hands for sure, and he put in a solid showing at the reunion show back in April. He didn’t have it for Lolla. I have to go on record and say that his voice wasn’t there like it used to be. I think they even played a set that sidestepped some of the more difficult tunes for CC to sing which meant, much to my chagrin, they didn’t play Beyond the Wheel, Hands all over, or The Day I tried to Live. I needed one of those songs. I would’ve loved to have heard, room a thousand years wide, although they did play searching with my good eye closed (opener). I thought the band sounded a little loose at the beginning, but by the end, they were really tight. Some of the highlights: Ugly Truth, Fell on Black Days, Blowup the outside world, Fourth of July, and Gun. The drummer never gets enough credit imho, and I have to say, the true freak in Soundgarden is Matt Cameron. He still has it, and he might even be better than he used to be. Obviously playing in Pearl Jam has kept him sharp. Unlike Green Day who went 15 minutes over, Soundgarden ended 10 minutes early on a weak tune. Kind of a bummer. I would def see SG again, and they went old school, they let the tunes do the talking. No elaborate lights, no fireworks, no goofy antics, just classic iron-forged rock.

Some random notes and thoughts from Lolla. Right before soundgarden, a woman came up to my buddy and said, “I have a friend who is really into ‘the green lantern’ can I take a picture of your shirt?” My buddy was wearing a green lantern shirt. How random is that though? I mean I can’t think of the last time someone asked to take a picture of my shirt prior to Saturday, and then the next day someone asks my buddy the same thing. Too weird. I guess we have good taste in Ts. The green lantern shirt is cool, and GL is kinda obscure so that’s good, but who is really a green lantern fan? I think maybe the woman was just putting the moves on him. I’m pretty sure that The green Lantern was the one super hero that was openly homosexual. Which was quite a milestone back in the day. The biggest bummer of Lolla had to be the conflicts. I guess they have to do it that way, but there were so many bands that I only caught a piece of cuz I had to get somewhere else. This really doesn’t fit well with my personality. It’s like when a band comes to town that I want to see, I feel bad when I don’t see them. If there was a band I wanted to see at Lolla, I had to see them, even if it was only for 15 minutes like MGMT. I would rather do it that way than feel like I missed something. The hipster of the show, the award winner, was wearing greenish faded black super tight cutoff at the knee jeans, a yellow obscure t shirt cut into a tank top, a black belt with a giant Frankenstein head belt buckle, and this really odd leather cap that had a curled up brim. Lot’s of other hipsters with funny mustaches curled up, tight pants, etc. A lot of the young kids were painted up like they wanted to be on the cover of an MGMT album. A lot of dudes were going shirtless. Not enough women were going shirtless. On a whole, the people-watching was an extreme disappointment. I’m not sure what the deal is, but if you are not a hipster, it seems the style is to look as shitty as possible. A lot of people with headbands, bandannas tied around their heads, stupid hats, stupid shoes, I dunno, there was a definite dearth of sartorial awareness. Ok. Creepy moment of the whole show. This guy dressed all in black stands right next to me at the beginning of Soundgarden, he’s short, red hair, red beard, looks dirty. Then I notice, he has open sores all over his arms. I don’t know what it was, but I didn’t want to catch it. I’m pretty tolerant, but I really wanted this guy to go away. Thankfully he did.

Lollapalooza Day Two

2010-08-09T19:19:00.001-07:00

I survived Lolla. Good times. One good thing I can say about Lolla, it helps you define what bands you really like from what bands are just ok. I guess this concept is kind of a no-brainer. Well let’s talk about the scam of Lolla first. The scam of Lolla is that they get a lot of decent acts and throw them together on one bill. When you see the names, you think “wow, that’s a lot of good bands.” You sorta get sucked into the idea of seeing a lot of bands, and you lose sight of the fact that not all the bands are bands you necessarily like, and not all of the bands are necessarily good. So the scam is that they sorta pack the thing with known quantities and try to suck in the widest variety of music aficionados and to do it as simply and cheaply as possible. When it comes to the headliner, they have to come strong, and I have to say that a good portion of your entertainment value from the event is derived from the headliner. If you don’t like the Strokes or Lady Gaga, but you do like Mavis Staples (theres’s gotta be somebody with that predilection out there right?) then you probably shouldn’t go to see Lolla on Friday cuz seeing Mavis Staples at 2pm on a Friday just isn’t that great, and then you gotta stick around or bail and at $90 a ticket, that’s not advisable. Enough about the philosophy of Lolla, discussing it is an exercise in futility. No need to overthink a musical event, at the end of the day, if they book enough bands you want to see, then maybe they’ll get you to pay $90, at the end of the day, that is their goal. Obviously they want to accomplish that goal as cheaply as possible, so that’s why they book a lot of mediocre bands to fill it up, and also why some bands probably have to pay to get on the bill. Dunno about that second one, but it wouldn’t surprise me if a band played for free just for the exposure. Anyhoo on to the review.

On Saturday, I was kinda amped for the Soft Pack. They were coming on at 1230. I met my homie and our other buddy over at homie’s place at like 1130. I wasn’t sure if they would be up for heading to the show early, but luckily they were and we rolled. A little precursor to day one, and a theme for me for the whole show, we might have done a bit too much traveling. Going from the two main stages on the south, to the two mainish stages on the north took about 10 minutes if you made good time. Traveling back and forth wasted a lot of listening time, but was good exercise. So we roll to the show and we are outside trying to scalp tix. I have to say, it was a pretty tough tick. I don’t think it was sold out, but I was hoping to get tix for like $50 each day, didn’t happen. We spent like a half hour peddling for tix and the only thing we got was people asking us if we were cops. Nice. Finally our buddy got a hold of some dude off of CL and he was like 10 feet away from where we were. We managed to get 3 tix for 200, $67 each. Not too bad. Face was $90, so a good savings from there. We get inside, get our bearings and go check The Morning Benders. TMB were on the Sony Bloggie stage, a minor stage just south of the two north main stages. TMB are very mellow, they aren’t offensive. Just nothing special. I will probably listen to their stuff again though, def don’t hate them. From the Morning Benders we went over to the Soft Pack on the Bud stage (north). I thought the soft pack was good, they brought their good shit, but they would’ve been better off doing a half hour set. Expanded into an hour they had to bring some weak sauce and that caused us to lose interest. Still like TSP, and will prolly still be geeked when they come up on the ipod. They are a once in a while, one tune on the ipod band, not a listen to the whole album band.

At this point our other buddy decided to go rogue, and go see Rogue Wave. He bailed, my buddy and I grabbed some food, then we went up and checked Harlem. Harlem was ok. Upbeat kinda punkish, didn’t make much of an impression one way or the other. We decided to try to reconvene with our bud at RW, so this was our first traverse from one end to the other. We caught some RW, didn’t find our bud, and bailed to get back to the other side to see Stars. On the way back, we hit a side stage (BMI) and caught a really good act, Dragonette. Supposedly these guys are the next Lady Gaga. They were good. The woman had an interesting voice and they had a live drummer which was good, the other person played synth. They were good, not necessarily my kind of music, but good. We cruised over and caught Stars. Stars is a band that sometimes when they come up on my ipod I’m like “who is this?” and other times I skip the song. Kind of hit and miss. The band was the same way live. Nothing special. We bailed on them and made the ¼ mile trek back across to catch Against Me. AM is good, a known quantity. They delivered even though they said they were only working on 2 hours of sleep. If that is true, they brought amazing energy. Good version of Thrash Unreal. I liked it. My tentative plan was to stick things out on the south side at this point. The only problem, Gogol Bordello was playing. GB is kind of sketchy. I don’t really like them, they are sort of a Russian version of Flogging Molly (who I also don’t like). They play a kind of unplugged Russian Gypsy Punk and it’s kind of a annoying. My buddies didn’t want to stick it out, so we cruised to catch Grizzly Bear. I don’t remember much about GB, but that pretty much illustrates that they were nothing special. I would say they sucked if I could remember anything about them. Ditto for a band called Dawes who we caught like 5 minutes of. At this point we started the cruise back to catch AFI. We stopped at the BMI stage cuz a band was playing with a singer that sounded like old Bono. They were pretty good. The Royal Bangs. Bad name, good tunes, I’m gonna prolly download their stuff.

We finished the trek across and AFI had already started. I don’t know about AFI. They play the kind of music that I like, but I don’t like them that much. Davey Havok brings great energy and their tunes are good, they just don’t really do it for me. They rock though, and one thing we learned is to err on the side of catching a band that rocks over a band that doesn’t. At an outdoor festival, loud and fast is good. AFI play loud and fast, so it was entertaining. I would def lump AFI into that category I mentioned earlier, sort of a filler band that might get people to cross the line and come to the show. I mean Against Me, AFI, Gogol Bordello, Social Distortion. They are all sort of good but not great and appeal to a similar demographic. Social D was next. Our one buddy ditched us to go catch Metric, he said they were really good. This bud ended up bailing on the festival due to gastro-intestinal issues. I was def more into Social D when I caught them at the Blind Pig in Ann Arbor (1991). Mike Ness didn’t look like a 50 yr old balding fat dude that looked more at home on a couch with a stained white tank top than on a stage in front of 30k people. What can you do? You can’t stop time. I’m sure I looked better back then too. Social D brought it. They played their tunes. They were tight. They ended with Ring of Fire, and I used to just love that song, now, it’s sorta played out. Slightly Stoopid (horrible name) were playing on the south side after Social D. They are some kind of Sublime-ish reggae, punk, funk, thing. Not a fan. We bailed to go catch Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. Dunno what to say about ESATMZ, I think they were ok. We couldn’t really get close enough to hear well. I have to listen to their mp3s. They are one of those bands with like 50 people on stage and I usually don’t care for that much.

At this point, it was getting late and the day had been grinding us down. We powerchugged water, and tried to soldier on, but my buddy was toast. He decided to hang it up. This led me to believe that he would also be out for Sunday as well. We shall see. He bailed. I was gonna stick it out. I wanted to see Green Day. I grabbed a bite to eat. Chilled and just decided to make my way over to get a spot for Green Day. Slightly Stoopid was still playing and they did play a cover of Nirvana’s Lithium which was pretty cool. I decided to go over and get some water before Green Day, on my way, a woman stopped me and said “can I take a picture of your shirt?” I was like “sure.” I was wearing a yellow Mad Dog 20/20 shirt. I was getting comments on it all day, I didn’t realize it was that big of a deal. I guess it had to be memorialized in film. Good shirt. My comment earlier about the headliner being most of the value of the ticket mainly came from Green Day. You gotta give them credit, they have come a long way since I saw them in 1994. They have a full on rockin stage show. They had fireworks which were cool. They have a bunch of crazy antics like bringing people up on stage, having a fan sing longview, doing some kind of weird ska revival. They also play their songs and they play them really well. I’m glad I stuck around. They brought it. They were only slotted for 2 hours and 15 minutes, they went over by 15 minutes. Billy Joe was like “They said they were gonna shut us down at 10 o’clock, but we’ll have to see cuz I’m not gonna be fucking done by then.” They took no breaks. Straight through 2.5 hours. They are showmen, they started as punkers and now they are something else. It was good though.

So that was Saturday. A hot day. I was re-upping on the sunscreen every few hours and managed to get no sun, just how I like it. Drank a lot of water. Didn’t have a beer til I got back to my buddy’s place. Good day. If you are curious how many times we crossed from the North stages to the south, it was 7 times. I’m guessing that’s at least 2 miles of walking. Prolly not a good idea. I like it that way though. I would rather catch a half hour of a bunch of bands than see a band’s whole set.

I wasn’t sure if I was gonna be back for Sunday cuz I didn’t know who I was gonna go with, I didn’t think my buddy would be up. Will I go? Will my buddy go? If I go, who will I go with? Will it suck? Will it rain? You’ll have to wait for the exciting answers to these questions in the next episode.

I really think so

2010-08-06T16:08:00.000-07:00

I’ve been thinking lately about writing another screenplay. Guess what the subject matter is…Dating. Yep I have a few scripts in mind about dating. One of them is called Friends with benefits. This will be a shocker of a storyline, it’s sorta like some kind of wonderful, but instead of just being arm-punch buddies with the other girl, the guy is banging her. So there’s that, and then I thought of another one that is sort of in the same vein. It’s actually almost the same movie. So maybe I don’t have 2 scripts here, but who cares. The other one is that the guy isn’t banging the friend, but he’s in a wholesome relationship with someone else, then in a moment of weakness he and the friend bang, and that screws everything up and much like in Requiem for a Dream, it sorta ends on a downer. Did RFD end on a downer? I can’t remember. Maybe I’m thinking of Magnolia. Anyhoo I gotta start writing. Although as you know, faithful reader, I am writing. I hadn’t realized it, but I’ve been fairly prolific. Most of my blog writing goes into one document. I just sorta keep adding onto it, but right up at the top, so it’s in reverse chronological order. Well I just noticed that I’m at the 93 (now 94) page mark. So I have 94 pages of musings. Not too shabby. I gotta focus this energy on a script though. It prolly wouldn’t hurt to fix up my other scripts and get them out there too. I was talking with my boss yesterday and it turns out that he’s a writer. Small world. He has written some stuff. He was not willing to share it, but that’s cool that he writes.

I’m starting to get amped to go to Japan. We had some Japanese people in town. Well it’s my sister in law’s brother’s family. He is American and the rest are, as you can guess, Japanese. They have a place in Yokohama which is just outside of Tokyo. We hung out, we bonded, my son learned some Japanese, and now I have an open invitation to visit. I’m totally going. I don’t know when, and I don’t know how. I don’t know who is going with me (maybe the kids, that would rock). I know I’m gonna go. So that’s on the list. I got a taste of Japanese culture, I got to try a Japanese P B and J. I call it that, because the Japanese kids were attending an American summer camp while they were in town. The dad puts them in the camp so their English will get better. Well for lunch, they were bringing Rice wrapped in Seaweed. Japanese PB and J. The shack I have at my disposal in Yokohama is fairly dope. So dope in fact, that it was featured on Japanese television. The guy had the video on his iphone and hooked it up to the TV. The show was pretty awesome. The fact that the dude was American was played to the hilt. When it started, they were playing Born in the USA in the background, later on, they played some bastardized version of John Denver. The most classic thing was at the end, he let out this “Yeeeeh Hah” yelp. He’s like, “yeah they asked me to do an American type yell.” I told him he did a pretty damn good job of it. If someone asked me to do an American yell, I probably would’ve yelled “Fuck off!” The Japanese are leaving town on Sunday and they do have a predicament. They bought about 9X more than their luggage will hold. The woman was doing her best to formulate a plan last night and it was fun to watch her work on the puzzle. The problem was they had 6 suitcases and about 12 piles of stuff. It just wasn’t adding up. I’m pretty much guaranteeing that they have to ship some stuff back. Ok. I’ll end the talk of the Japanese on this note. One of the items that they hoard into their luggage and attempt to ferret past customs is…Hamburger Helper. Not only do they covet HH, but they throw a party, invite over their friends and they feast on the American delicacy…Hamburger Helper. Pretty funny.

What is up with Lady Gaga? Does she have a cult? I saw separate groups of dudes today, Black gaga t’s, faux hawks, and they looked latin American. Is that her demographic? I guess. I would check Lady Gaga if I had the chance. Tonight is gonna be a prep night though. I’ve got laundry to do, and I should get a good night sleep. Then the rest of the weekend should rage. Stay tuned, next week I’ll have a full blow by blow account of the melee that Lollapalooza purports to be.

It doesn't matter

2010-08-06T04:40:00.001-07:00

I dunno what rock I’ve been under, but I had no idea that Beck, of Loser fame, was married to Marisa Ribisi. When did this happen!!!!???! I don’t think I knew Beck was married at all. I thought he got jilted by some woman, was uber pissed, and wrote a pretty good record about it (Sea Change). I didn’t know that he was all healed up and a family man now. In case you don’t know Marisa Ribisi, you might say “hrm that last name does sound familiar.” She is Giovanni Ribisi’s twin sister. As if that wasn’t enough (and it isn’t, seriously), she is also in a relatively well known cult classically famous movie. She was in Dazed and Confused. No, not Mitch’s sister. No, not the crazy bitch, that’s Parker Posey, we all know her. No, Not the kid’s mom with the shotgun. Who does that leave? The freshman girl? No not her, and not the girl from the Kevin Smith films with the annoying voice. Have I dragged this out enough? She is the red-headed afro girl who zips up her jeans with pliers. That has to be one of the most memorable images from the film. I think she also hooks up with Wooderson in the film, another feather in her cap. Well that actress, Marisa Ribisi, is married to Beck and I think they have a kid. Hooray for the Hansens. They need to have 2 more kids, then they could have a boy band and call it Hansen. No one would ever confuse them with Hanson, totally different. Spelled different.

Wow, I managed to get a paragraph out of a minute piece of trivia. Kudos to me. What else is on my mind? The cerebral palsy guy from the train has been in my thoughts recently. I was thinking about sitting down with him and finding out what his deal was. I would totally do it, and I’d like to become his friend (I think, I don’t really know him), I just know that I’m only approaching him to get a story out of him, and I don’t feel right about that. Anyway, I was thinking that the guy is kind of inspiring. He uses a walker, and he plods along like his legs weigh 1000 pounds each. So I was thinking what I would ask him, and I really want to know if he’s ever been laid. I’m thinking he has. I don’t know why. I wouldn’t put money on it, but I have a hunch. I’d also like to tell him that he’s an inspiration to me. That would probably really freak him out. If I ask those two questions in succession he would probably be moving to a different train car. Seriously though, it’s like every step he takes is a little victory for him, and every step I take is a reminder of the fact that I’m not what I could be. It helps to think about it. I mean it’s all an exercise in thought. Why can’t I be happy with every step I take? Why can’t every step be a victory for me too? It’s all mental. Maybe every step is a victory for me and I just don’t know it. Maybe fighting the good fight, doing the right thing, being a good person, and eating a lot of cheetos is a victory. I’m gonna call it some kind of victory. Maybe we’re all heroes. Like Bowie said, “we could be heroes. Just for one day.” I disagree, we can be heroes every day, we just have to think it.

I wrote a bunch of crap that is too personal to put in here. Wouldn’t you like to know what it is? Too bad. Good news on the band front. I think we have a band now. We picked up a bassist. Still have high hopes for playing out and coming to a dive bar near you. Speaking of dive bars, I went to a sweet dive bar up on California somewhere. It’s called Ronny’s. It’s tiny. It’s like if Beat Kitchen (which is tiny) had a little brother. I saw Noise by numbers there. It was a really good time. I had exquisite company, and they played a great albeit short set. I dunno how people hooked onto this place, but it’s booking a lot of punk shows. The Arrivals are playing there next Thursday, and I’d really like to see that. I mean the place is like a garage, anyone would be good there. I’m glad I had earplugs though, it was pretty loud. Maybe I can get my band booked at Ronny’s. That’s the idea.

Lolla is this weekend. I think I’m all set to go Saturday and Sunday. Saturday sounds like a definite. I’m a nerd, so I went on the website and mapped out all the bands I wanna see and made a custom schedule. On Saturday it’s looking like: The morning benders, The soft Pack, Stars, Against me, Gogol bordello, AFI, Social Distortion, Spoon, and Green Day. Sunday: (depending on when I get there) Health, Blitzen Trapper, Minus the Bear, Hockey!!, The Verve pipe?, MGMT/Wolfmother (tough call), The National, and Soundgarden. So I basically only have one person to go with, no one else is really interested. My buddy kinda only wanted to go to one day. Now it’s looking like he’s locked into two. I have someone else lined up to go on Saturday, so that will force the issue for that day. I’m pretty sure Saturday is a lock. Then on Sunday we were supposed to go and meet this girl we went to High School with, so I think my bud will go to that. Or if I go alone, I can just hang with this girl. Plus Soundgarden is playing Sunday, so that is a can’t miss situation. I’m pretty geeked the weather looks good. I’m not sure about the tickets. It might be tough. It’s gonna be hot, but not too hot, and it doesn’t look like rain is in the forecast. It will prolly be pretty crowded. I should be a lot more geeked than I am actually. I love this kind of stuff. Just love it. I love seeing all the bands and all the people, the energy, going from stage to stage, seeing a lot of bands that I like, it rules. Maybe my relative chill attitude is good, maybe I will enjoy it more by the contrast. I won’t have too high expectations. We shall see.

It just doesn't matter

2010-07-26T20:35:00.000-07:00

I had the best dream last night. I’m really trying to figure out why it was so refreshing. It went like this…I was sitting on a hillside (I think) with my children. We were all just hanging around. I think it was evening, late afternoon, still light out. Then much like in Built To Spill’s “Randy Described Eternity” a sphere came into view on the horizon. It looked like a planet that had come into our atmosphere. It looked like another earth. IT was only a few hundred feet off the ground. As it got closer I could make out more of the details. It’s hard to say if it was supposed to look like a planet, or if that was just the most efficient way for it to be, hence it looked that way. I think it was green, or it was reflecting the green from the Earth, it had a river looking design that looked like a large river breaking off into little rivers. In the upper left hand corner it had a sort of camera that looked like a ball-in-socket configuration. The camera was swiveling in the socket and looking at us on Earth. Then the ship sent out reconnaissance (spelled right first try) spheres that were just metal with the ball-in-socket camera in them. I think my kids and I understood the enormity of what was going on, we were being visited by aliens, but we weren’t scared. It was good. I think after a while we did get scared though, or other people were panicking and that caused us to panic. We got in the car and started driving, things turned weird and that’s all I remember. When I woke up, I felt really good about it though. I don’t know why.

I was probably dreaming about aliens because I saw a movie about aliens over the weekend. I pretty much spent the weekend doing 2 things. Well I guess 4 things. Working out, laying around, watching movies, and updating itunes. By far, the best thing I did was watch the movie District 9. I’m not a movie recommender, ask people who know me, I’m very very critical of movies and rarely do I see one that moves me. District 9, maybe it didn’t move me (I was just quoting PE), but it definitely sucked me in, which is not easy to do. As I look back on it, I can shoot some holes in the premise, there are things that happen that defy logic. What I mean by that is people react in ways that I don’t think people would actually react. For me, this is the toughest hurdle to get over, and a movie has to suck me in to get me to ignore the inconsistencies, most movies don’t succeed. This one did.

I don’t feel comfortable talking about the other 2 movies I watched in the same paragraph. Zach and Miri (make a porno) and Year One. Z and M was pretty ok. It was interesting to see how Jason Mewes has changed since Clerks, not necessary to see his full frontal though. Kind of a disappointment that Katie Morgan was the porn star in it, well the one who was naked the most. She has an HBO show where she’s pretty much naked the whole time, which kinda makes her nudity in the film a non-factor. Def have to mention that she has one of the weirdest boob jobs I’ve ever seen, they’re huge, but they sort of square off at the bottom, or diagonal off. I don’t know what you call that, it’s not bad, she has a great body, it’s just very different. My main problem with Z and M is that it wasn’t funny. I thought the jokes were lame. I have to break down and admit that I did kind of like the story. I liked the characters and the performances by Seth Rogan and Elizabeth Banks were solid enough to draw me into the story. One element that was present in both Z and M and Year One, that I think can go right back where it came from (???) is the scat humor. For those of you that don’t know what scat is, it’s humor (or whatever) that involves fecal matter (poo). I really don’t want to get into it. I don’t find it funny and I do find it revolting.

Year One. I have to admit that Year One had its moments. It definitely made me laugh out loud a couple of times. Jack Black and Michael Cera were decent foils and a good bit of their exchanges were humorous. The woman who played the princess was absolutely drop dead gorgeous. I have no idea what her name is. The guy that played Cain (Cain and Abel) was really funny. I can’t recommend the film, but it had some funny parts and if you happen to catch it part way through and you have nothing else to do, then watch it.

I would be remiss if I didn’t comment on the joys of itunes. Oh how I love being inextricably tied to software as unyielding as itunes, oh how I do. Well normally you’d be able to simply drag and drop the files from one folder to another to transfer music. Not so with itunes. I can’t find the files on the computer to drag and drop. I did manage to get all my emusic downloads and transfer them to my new computer. Then I transferred my itunes folder, but there was a ton of stuff missing. Like 10 gb of music. I really, really, did not want to have to reburn all these cds. I started to do it and I was getting like maybe 10 an hour, if I had the wherewithal to sit there for an hour. I had to get the files off of the other computer. So I hooked my hard drive to the other computer and all I could think of doing was to highlight the songs right in itunes and drag and drop them into a folder on the hard drive. This is a fairly long and annoying process, but not nearly as long and annoying as reburning all my cds. It took about an hour, but I got all the music into a folder on the hard drive. The next question was whether this would work. I had a sneaking suspicion that although the files were dropped onto the hard drive, they would still map to the original computer making them useless on another computer. Par for the course with Apple. To my surprise, the files actually transferred and I managed to get them onto my laptop. Score. I think all my music is going to be successfully transferred to my new computer by the end of the week. Not too bad. I also spent a ton of time removing bad files from itunes and basically cleaning up the repeats and everything. So I’m just about fully functional for all my music needs. One bonus that was unexpected. A lot of the music that I transferred was stuff that I never listen to. I just have it for a rainy day. Well I ended up accidently dumping all my transfers into my ipod. I just went with it and I’m rediscovering a bunch of awesome stuff. A few names…The Stone Roses, Black Flag, Sludgeworth, Naked Raygun, Guided By Voices, and Archers of Loaf.

Sorry this is so long and boring. This blog is sort of a microcosm of my weekend. Although I did get out to Taste of Lincoln last night. I met a bunch of people over at Lillys. Lillys brings back a lot of memories…sort of. Memories of not having any memory. It didn’t seem like Lilly’s is still the hotspot it used to be. Back in the day people would hang there. It would be stupid packed and everyone would be drinking long island Iced Teas. The bar says there are 10 shots in every glass. Not likely. But these things are a one way trip to blackoutsville, that’s for sure. I used to tangle with them. In fact, back in the day, we would get pitchers of long islands and after two, you’d be drinking and completely lose track of how many you had until everything went black and you woke up the next day. I’m a parent now, I work, I have obligations, I have no desire to tangle with the Long Islands anymore, but my friends did tangle. I think they got fairly messed up as we lost contact and couldn’t regain said contact even though we all thought we were in the same place. Some thoughts on the night. Perfect weather. Great band at Lillys, I could’ve (and should’ve) stayed there and just listened to them. It was nice and cool, we had way comfy seats and a short trip to the bar for egregiously overpriced beers. I think the band was called TAXI. They were good. I’d check them again. Alas we left the soft bosom of Lillys for the harsh reality of the Soul Asylum show. The reality of Soul Asylum was that the bass player must’ve blown the sound guy, cuz all you could hear was bass. I think if you interviewed the bass player after the show he would have said “That’s the way the music is supposed to be.” It’s not. The bass was overpowering everything else.

As I stood there unable to meet up with my other buddys, I got into a conversation with my buddy’s brother. It was very interesting. I told him that I was exchanging e-mails with this woman who went to Michigan, blah blah, and he said you’re not following Dr. Love. I was like, “what?” He said that Dr. Love tells you not to text or e-mail ever, unless it’s to get the girl’s phone number. Once you have the phone number, you only call her to set up a date. I know the point, and I get it, that quite often, women lose interest in a guy that seems too eager. I could go on for days, this is not a new concept by any stretch of the imagination. Woody Allen put it best when he said, “I would not want to belong to a club that would accept me for a member.” It’s a self esteem thing. This is a crazy can of worms, and I’m not Dr. Love and I don’t follow what he is teaching. The one thing that I can’t change, and I don’t want to change, is who I am. The thing is, that I want a woman to accept me for who I am (that sounded lame). I’m not a cast member from the Jersey shore. I don’t get a girl’s number at the bar and then laugh about it with my friends and rip it up. I’m not a player. Dr. Love is teaching men how to be players. He is giving them the attitude, or at least showing them how to make women think that they have the attitude. That’s all well and good. I’m sure a lot of men buy into it. I just don’t want a woman to like me because I come off as being something I’m not, and I don’t want a woman who doesn’t want me for who I am. It’s like, I don’t want a woman to be into me because she thinks I can get another woman who is hotter than her. Who thinks like that? It’s a game that I don’t want to be a part of. Once again, it’s a self esteem boost for the other party, and that’s it. She’s not into me, she’s into stroking her own ego by saying she got me away from the other woman. That’s lame. I def agree that you don’t want to come off as desperate, but if you want a good match, you have to present yourself honestly.

It's gotta end sometime

2010-07-23T17:19:00.001-07:00

Happy thoughts for a Friday. Well people were all wound up waiting for the European Union to release their findings from the bank stress tests they conducted. It seemed like a big non-event, and the market is basically going sideways on the news. This got me to thinking about the depression that a lot of people seem to be calling for. Not that they’re calling for it, but they are predicting it. The third great depression (did you know there was one in the 1870s? I didn’t either). I don’t know why I started to think about Hitler, I’m trying to connect that dot. Maybe it’s because I was reading about Iran and their nuclear ambitions. Not much of a connection there. Anyway, I was thinking about how Hitler rose to power during the aftermath of the great depression, or whatever they called it in Germany. I guess that helps to answer the questions of how someone like Hitler could achieve so much power and seemingly have the support of the people. I say seemingly, because I think Hitler ruled by fear, and I’m gonna guarantee that people were afraid to oppose him or the third reich in any way. So, that’s not really a people’s mandate so much as everyone is scared shitless to come out and say “this guy is wacko, what are we thinking? Somebody has to stop him!” But it was the economy that allowed Hitler to springboard into power. Now, I have to admit that I know absolutely nothing about Hitler’s rise to power, I don’t know if he was popular cuz he gave out bread or made big promises, or just worked the fear thing mentioned earlier. It just doesn’t matter, the point is that he rose to power in a severe economic climate, and if another severe economic climate develops as many are predicting that one is developing, we may have another Hitler come to power.

Ok. I don’t want to talk about Hitler. I would, if I knew anything about him. I really don’t want to know anything about him though. It’s like, I would like to have known about him enough to maybe comment further on this idea, but I have no desire to do the actual research required to make said observations. A conundrum for sure. Anyhoo, the thing I really wanted to say is that when the whole world economy goes into the shitter as it very well might in the next 3 years, someone, somewhere, is gonna launch a nuke. When things get dire, when people aren’t eating, when people are pissed off, someone is gonna push the button. Okay, this was an easy google, the countries that currently have nukes are USA, Russia, UK, France, and China. There are some other nations claiming nuclear capabilities that I’m a little skeptical of: India (very likely to have them), Pakistan (who the fuck knows what they’re doing), North Korea (yeah, and they also have anti gravity boots, Spanish fly that works, and telepathic telephones, these guys couldn’t blow up a lemonade stand with their ‘weapons’), and Israel (very likely). Safe to say if things turn bad, there are enough nukes out there, that somebody is gonna push the button. I really don’t think we will see the eradication of the human race. I guess that’s a good place to start. I think there could be some mass devastation, probably in the US, because it’s safe to say that we’re a prime target. If someone launches a nuke at us, chances are we will return the favor. Pakistan? Wasn’t that blown off the map? Yep. I’m not the WOPR, so I can’t foresee all the possible attacks and retaliations, but that little scenario I threw out there kinda undermines the idea that the US will be a target, just cuz everyone knows how that would end. You bomb us with some piece of junk that might not work, we eradicate you. Not good odds for the other guys. More likely, someone like Iran lobs something at Israel. Who knows? It’s just food for thought. No doubt if things get ugly, we will all see things that we’d never thought we’d see and go through things we prayed we’d never have to.

On to lighter subjects. I stumbled upon a website that I haven’t thought about in years. Well it’s still around and it’s still pretty darn acerbically funny. I’m talking about Buddyhead. I was just reading their best/worst album reviews for 2009 and it got me laughing out loud a number of times. I didn’t know Dashboard Confessional had a new album last year, buddyhead’s take: “These guys redefined sucking back in 2001.” I dunno, I laughed. Check it out. No need to read the likes, I think I’ve heard of like 2 of the 30 albums that they like. Go straight to the albums they don’t like. Good stuff. They are pretty good at blowing the bands they like, but it’s not nearly as funny as the bands they attack. While I’m on this subject. I’m having a hard time getting motivated to write those record reviews for Pitchfork. I just don’t have any desire to fit into that crowd. I’d have to buy a pair of adidas sambas, roll up my jeans to my knees, buy some plaid short-sleeve oxfords, grow a mustache, and grow out my hair and slick it down. I’m just not there. Whatever I review is just gonna be dismissed by them cuz it’s not Santogold or Andrew Bird. I’m sorta down on the whole idea of record reviews. I mean, who reads them? Do you seriously need someone to review a record before you go check it out? Nowadays you can listen to most records, or parts of them, for free. So if you hear of a band, you can just go listen to it, you don’t need some dildo that’s dressed like a serial killer telling you whether it’s good or not, you can just decide for yourself. That’s how I do it, it seems to be working.

Rock and roll this weekend. Taste of Lincoln ave. They are calling for rain. We shall see. Soul Asylum. Should be good. They rock. And amazingly, I’ve never seen them. Good times are expected.

Yep

2010-07-21T20:15:00.001-07:00

I totally blew my wad yesterday. I dunno what to talk about today.

I was thinking about my profile on OKC last night. It def needs some work. It’s hard for a guy on a dating site because you really have to keep it simple and walk softly. If you are way cute for a dude, you can get away with being a little weird and saying some weird stuff. If you are not just drop dead adorable, then you better not push it. The problem with this notion is that your profile can be a real snoozer. So I try to spice up my profile where I can. On OKC they ask you a lot of stupid questions and it gets old pretty quick. One of the hardest questions is “The First Thing People Notice About Me Is…” I really honestly have no idea. I should probably put “that I’m a lot better looking than my pictures.” That might sound like an excuse for not looking good and a blatant lie in an attempt to get someone to look past whether my pix appeal to them or not; rather pathetic. I try to avoid looking like a puss, meek, dork (although some dorkiness is cool nowadays). As you can see there is a lot of thought that must go into these profiles. Back to the question. The first thing people notice about me is… The first time around, I just thought I would put something funny and at least self flattering, I put “My guns, they’re hard to hide.” I know 90% of the population knows what I’m talking about, but when women see the word “gun” they might get the wrong image. It doesn’t matter if it’s a joke, or whatever, it’s the idea of it that scares them, and I don’t think it takes much to scare them. I messaged some woman and she replied, “By guns, do you mean actual guns? Or Muscles?” I guess that isn’t obvious from my pix…bummer. Although you would like to think that everyone gets it, they don’t, some people picture me walking around town like Wyatt Earp with two six shooters strapped to my sides. Which would def get me some chix back in the day. I think using the word gun is a bad idea, so I decided to switch my answer. I changed it to “The first thing people notice about me is…” “That I’m not there.” I really like this answer. I think it might be a little more off-putting than guns, but I’m gonna stick with it for at least a while. The right person should really think this is an awesome answer. It’s like looking into a mirror with a mirror in your hand and the reflection goes on forever, that’s what thinking about that question and answer is. And I like that.

While we are on the topic of Faux pas. Getting back into dating has just magnified my ability to commit a faux pas at every opportunity. It’s like every little thing can be a deal breaker. It’s tough. Sometimes you have to take a chance though. Like last night. I messaged a bunch of women. One of them may have been named Lenore, it was in her profile name. The first thing I think of when I see Lenore, is “Quoth the Raven, Nevermore.” So I sent her a message and started with that line. I haven’t read the raven in a long time. I read it today. It’s pretty dark. I don’t know if it’s the repetition or the subject matter, but it’s creepy and off-putting to say the least. The subject matter is so bleak. The guy is pining for his lost love and basically the only thing that gets him by is the notion that his love, Lenore, is in heaven or whatever. He asks the raven if Lenore is in heaven and the raven says “Nevermore.” How bleak and hopeless of a message. You can just picture how this guy would be crushed and driven to madness from the loss not only of his love, but of his hope. So…yeah it might not have been the best opener. You live and learn. You have to take the good with the bad, and the bonus is that I read the Raven again, and it’s a really good poem.

I’m thinking about trying to become a writer at Pitchfork.com. I’m torn about it. I would like to write about music, but I don’t want to have to write positive reviews about bands like: Blitzen Trapper, Vampire Weekend, Beach House, Deerhunter, Yeasayer, Fiery Furnaces, you get the idea. Some of these bands I’ve only had a cursory exposure to, but I can safely say that they all suck. I like the fact that Pitchfork represents indie, but indie is becoming mainstream and that is annoying to me. Luckily there is punk rock, which I think has had its moment in the sun, and is now back where it belongs, in the gutters. I might still try out for PF though. They want 4 writing samples, all from a blog, which I’ll have to make up, and they all have to be album reviews as far as I can tell. I don’t know what albums to review. I don’t think Changes 2 by Bowie would go over well. I think Hockey would be up their alley and maybe The soft pack. I dunno who else, Green Day. That would prolly go over like a lead turd. I should review The Statler Brothers, Oh Baby Mine. That would probably get me the job right there. I said job, but I think it’s more of you get a T-shirt to pick up chix with by saying you write for pitchfork and you met Vampire Weekend. I think I have to submit (interesting choice of words, multiple meanings) by July 25, which would mean that I have to listen to 4 albums and write 4 reviews by then. Maybe they would take a 2 word review, simply…Shit Sandwich.

That’s it. I’m sure I have no readers left after the tome I threw out there yesterday. Go read the Raven if you’re bored.

Better than nyquil

2010-07-20T16:44:00.000-07:00

Phew. That was sad stuff yesterday talking about my buddy’s dad, my friend, Jack. I guess I’m still melancholy today, I dunno why. I was just thinking about stuff, like going to taste of Lincoln ave this weekend. My buddy Worm is gonna go. So that is cool. I haven’t hung out with him in a while. Thinking about Worm got me thinking about college and the band we used to play in, and all the fun shit we used to do. Not just the fun shit, but my attitude back then was different. I had more enthusiasm back then for sure. I had a lot more confidence, or just youthful exuberance. Now I find myself brooding about stuff a lot. Sometimes I feel that same exuberance and I’m just on top of the world, and other times, I just don’t. I don’t know. I guess you get older, you get more introspective, you def get out of touch with young people. I was eating lunch yesterday with young people and they were all chatting about stuff, going out, getting hammered. I didn’t have anything to add. Oh well. This weekend should be a good time, and it will be nice to hang with Worm and anyone else who comes out to taste of Lincoln Ave.

I had a roller coaster weekend, and it all started on Thursday. I had the day off on Friday, so I could let loose on Thurs. A woman contacted me on OKC and wanted to meet. I’m always good with that. I could tell by her profile, that we might not be the best match. I didn’t find her very attractive. Some people don’t photograph well, so I thought that she might be one of those, so what the heck. She wanted to meet at a coffee shop. I don’t drink coffee. I don’t like coffee shops. It was Thursday, which was like Friday to me, so I suggested the Gage, an upscale bar off of Millennium Park. I got held up, and she was there when I got there. It was good. It might have been one of the best dates I’ve ever had. It just worked. It was a little stilted at first, but some good conversation started flowing after the beer kicked in. She is really an interesting person, she acts, she’s into music, and she’s a new Catholic. I was floored by this one. She recently became a Catholic. I’m a Catholic, and I like it, it’s tough, and there’s a guilt thing. I haven’t met too many people that became Catholic later in life, it was fascinating to me. She went into how Catholicism made her feel freer, I forget her reasoning, but it was working for her. Listening to her enthusiasm for the faith sort of inspired me to look at my faith a bit differently. Good talk Russ. So after we got a bit jingled, we decided to take a walk. We went up to Mill Park and we both hit the rest rooms. Then we cruised up to Pritzker Pavilion. There was a really groovy latin ensemble playing and the place was pretty crowded. We found a spot on the lawn and just sat there listening to the music. I have to say, it sounded really good coming out of those speakers suspended above the field, the music definitely surrounds you at that place. I had some foodstuffs from work, and I hadn’t eaten, so I offered her a granola bar which she graciously accepted. I busted into a banana. I only had one water, so we shared it (vicarious spit swapping.) It was a nice moment, and it shows how nice a date can be. The problem was, for how interesting she was and everything; I just wasn’t feeling the sparks. I had to run to catch the train, and she was ready to roll. We walked a ways. She had to catch the el. We hugged and that was it. I’m not the type to just blow somebody off, especially someone that I met in person. I just wasn’t feeling it though. So I manned up and sent her a message saying I had a great time and she is a special person, but I’m not feeling any sparks. She said thanks for the message and good luck.

I think I mentioned before that I planned to take my kids to Wisconsin Dells. The more I thought about it, the more I didn’t want to go. If I had the money, it would’ve been different. I just figured, why go to Wisconsin to do a bunch of stuff I can do right here. So I decided to have an adventure weekend with the kids, just get out and do a lot of stuff, just like if we were in Wisconsin Dells. WD has a lot of water parks, so on Friday, we hit the biggest water park in Illinois. It’s about an hour from my house, not too bad. The place was big. It was crowded, but I’m sure it’s worse on Sat and Sun. The rides were pretty fun. My personal faves were the giant slide that just goes straight down, although the water wedgie is an unfavorable byproduct of that ride. Next I have to go with the boomerang, which was basically a giant funnel. It would rock to actually go down a funnel, but that would probably be too dangerous. The way this thing worked is that you get 4 people on a raft and you basically go down around a corner and then you just drop straight down. The drop is pretty awesome, much better facing forward than backward though. The speed from the drop sends you shooting up the far side of the funnel, then you come down and go back and forth til you come out of the funnel and into the pool. It doesn’t sound that sweet, but the first drop is a doozy. I think I’ve mentioned before that I’m a huge, huge fan of lazy rivers. That is def my favorite ride. Sometimes when I feel crappy and just need to chill, I’ll close my eyes and just picture myself floating down a river lying on my back. The lazy river is a realization of this dream! The only difference is when random kids biff you in the head as they go by and fight with their friends, or the kids jump on me when my eyes are closed, that’s not part of the dream. Anyway, I did some sweet floating down the Lazy River. The place was huge, they also had a wave pool and like 5 other waterslides that were just tubes. We stayed there til it closed, 7pm. When we got home, we were all pretty beat. The kids wanted to watch a movie, so I went looking through the free flicks on On Demand. We ended up watching The Sure Thing. I guess that movie is only PG-13. It’s borderline for sure. I’m not sure if it was kid appropriate, but they liked it. They had a lot of questions about shotgunning beers. I told them to ask again when they are 21.

On Saturday, we caught the train to Chicago. I’m never a fan of taking the train on the weekend. I’d rather just drive. The train is a real pain in the ass, but the kids wanted to do it, so we went to the train station. We got there about 10 minutes early, and the train was 21 minutes late. Bad start. Finally we got downtown, and our first stop was my work. We were planning on going to Dues for Pizza later, so I didn’t want to feed them too much, although we were all starving. So we made the mile trek to my office before we ate. When we got there, we made a mad dash for the kitchen. The kids pigged out on cookies and Dr. Pepper, I grabbed some cereal. That was a good stop, we got our grub on and cruised. The kids really liked the office, it was nice, it’s nice for them to see where I work and get an idea of what I do. Next the kids wanted to hit the Lego Store. I was letting them choose the itinerary. I wanted to hit Millennium Park, they had no interest in that. Off to the lego store we went. I knew that they were filming Transformers 3 on Michigan Avenue, so I knew this would be a pain, and it was. I couldn’t get over how many people were standing around looking at basically a bunch of trucks and cars with covers on them. There was nothing to see there, no cameras, no stars, no decepticons, nothing. But people were lining the block trying to catch a glimpse of something. It was fairly annoying. We made it to the lego store, and after about an hour of deliberation, everyone decided on a purchase, and with minimal pain, we got this part of the trip handled. Well sort of. We had to go back and exchange something, because one of my children had buyer’s remorse on the escalator. I’m used to it.

By this point it was around 430, and we were all pretty famished. The kids were really not in the mood for Pizza, so I let them choose. They all wanted burgers, and they wanted to get them at Boston Blackies. Well BB had closed down, but the BB by Michigan Avenue had reopened under new ownership. The burgers were the same, very tasty. You just can’t beat the kid’s meal there. For 4.99, you get a burger, fries, and a drink. The burger is an adult size, like a half pound. They don’t let adults get the kids meal, unfortunately. Next time, I’m just going to graze off of my kids. My burger was 8.99, no fries, just burger. They probably have a rule that you can’t order a kids meal without ordering an adult meal. If they don’t, they should. So after BB, we were trying to figure out what to do. The kids wanted to go to the top of the Sears (aka Willis) tower. I was good with that. I figured it would be an easy do cuz the loop is usually a ghost town on the weekend. Wrong. Hour and a half wait. Eff that. It was like 540, and I wanted to catch the 640 train. I didn’t want the kids to have to sit around for an hour, so we went over to the water taxi stand. I figured I would take them on a quick round trip boat ride. I didn’t think it would take more than a half hour. Wrong. The boat ride was to Navy Pier and it was about 630 when we got there, no way we could get back for the train. Not much choice but to check out Navy Pier and catch the 840 train. We grabbed some Ice Cream, played some miniature golf, made friends with some people on the mini golf course. At mini golf, we had to skip around, so we jumped in front of a group of 10 people golfing together (who were basically the reason that the whole course was backed up). The other reason the course was backed up, everybody, pretty much, was playing one player at a time. Do these people have no inkling of the etiquette of mini golf? I guess not. You play as a foursome, just like golf, you each putt, then the farthest out putts until everyone holes out. It’s not science. If each person plays the hole solo, it makes for a much longer round. Anyway, we had to high tail it out of there cuz I didn’t want our new friends to follow us. So we bolted for the boat. We got on around 8 and I was a little nervous about catching the train. I have no idea why, but the train was off the wall crowded. WE lucked out and got seats. A lot of people had to stand, and the train ride took longer than usual. We made it home though. We were all pretty beat, so we just crashed.

On Sunday, I tried to keep the rock rolling. The kids did not find church to be that rocking, especially the hour and 15 minute mass. That’s ok though, cuz it rocked after that. I took the kids go karting. Go karting is fun, I think it’s funner when you are a kid. When you get to be oh…about…16, go karts lose some of their luster. I think the kids liked it though and everyone got to ride. My daughter had to ride as a passenger, but the boys got to drive their own cars, which they loved. WE also played some mini golf, and since we got the family package, we got to hit the batting cages. The kids didn’t want to bat, so I decided to use up the tokens. I went into the 70 mph cage and I wasn’t sure if I could even make contact with 70. Well I was using some miniature bat, and I was fouling most of them off. Some dipshit in a goofy fedora starts talking to his buddy, “he’s just fighting em off.” It’s like, “You get in here and try this, dumbass, I’m using a little league bat.” I saw some other dude get into the 70 cage, he brought his own bat. I dunno if he was testing switch hitting, but he was whiffing left and right. So it wasn’t easy. I never saw Fedora boy in the cage, I guess he’s just a critic.

We pretty much just lased around the rest of the day on Sunday. Awesome weekend though. Party packed action. Hopefully this weekend will be packed with some adult action. Taste of Lincoln.

Jack

2010-07-19T19:40:00.000-07:00

I don’t think I’m very good at eulogies, but I’m going to give it a shot. My good friend’s father died yesterday. It wasn’t sudden, he was on hospice, but it’s still sad and leaves a big hole in a lot of people’s lives. His name was Jack. When you talked about Jack amongst people who have had more than just a cursory introduction to him, they knew who you were talking about. Jack is a common name, but somehow Jack transcended it and became The Jack. I don’t think people are going to be calling me The Jim anytime soon (I hope), so you have to be a larger than life person to leave that type of impression on people. Well Jack certainly was larger than life. He had his own philosophy on things and it usually involved him being right and everyone contradicting him being wrong. I think he thought the world revolved around him, and I don’t have any problem with that. When you were around Jack, you were in Jack’s world, and he made the rules. Well most of them. He wasn’t completely intractable; he was open to reason at times.

I think it’s safe to say that the one thing Jack loved above almost everything else on Earth, was Michigan Football. Jack grew up in Michigan. He was born and bred on Maize and Blue. The first time I met him was at a Michigan Tailgater. He used some of his pull at GM to hook up a perfect spot just a stone’s throw from the stadium, and that’s where he set up shop on Saturdays in the Fall, for Michigan Football. My buddy and I would always stop by the tailgater on the way to the game. Jack would meet us with a beer and a smile. We’d throw the football around, and Jack would pull out the jam box. He would play the Michigan band, Bambalance (don’t ask), and one of the single best things I’ve ever heard in my life, The best of Bob Ufer. A lot of people outside of the state of Michigan have no idea who Bob Ufer is. Well he is one of the most awesome biased announcers to ever hit the airwaves. Nowadays, in the era of political correctness, most of the announcers try to call an even game; they don’t let their affinity for one team or the other leak out. Not Ufer, he was Maize and Blue through and through. Jack had a best of Bob Ufer tape that he compiled himself and it included all the classics, from Tommy Darden, to Supertoe, to Darth Vader Woody Hayes roaming the sidelines at Ohio State. There was/is nothing like listening to that Ufer tape to get you amped up to attend a Michigan Football game.

Late in the Season one year, we were playing Northwestern. My Buddy and I drove in and met Jack at the game. We tailgated, and had a few beers. Well we managed to sneak a few beers into the stadium. We had an extra ticket, so at halftime, somebody left the stadium, went back to the car, and snuck in a bunch more beer. By the end of the game, there were like 25 beer cans in front of our seats. Luckily the tight security at the Big House didn’t catch onto our shenanigans. Jack liked to tip a few back in the day, he was fun to hang with. He wasn’t always a fan of the Michigan coaching staff and would get into arguments with the other patrons at the stadium on this and other subjects. The arguments usually ended with Jack handing out “tongue lashings” to those foolish enough to confront him. Jack got to see some good Michigan Football in his day and at least he got to watch us win the whole enchilada in 97. We all went to the Rose Bowl in 2005. That was a blast. What an awesome game. We gave Texas everything we had, there was just no answer for Vince Young; a lesson that the mighty USC Trojans learned the next year in the National Championship at the same stadium.

I could go on for days about Jack. He got a little football crazy one day and decided to go at my buddy out of a three point stance. My bud deftly dodged the block and Jack went face first into the stove. The stove was the worse for the wear with a dent in the handle. Jack came out of it with two black eyes. So he put his M jersey on and sent out a picture captioned “You don’t want none of this.” No doubt about that one. Another time my bud and I were down in Bloomington where Jack moved for work. Jack had been invited to a wedding, but wasn’t up for going. So Jack sent my buddy and me as his envoys. It was a pretty good time. I believe it was held at the Motel 6. We grabbed a few beers, listened to sweet home Alabama get played out of a boombox, and then bolted. This became affectionately known as…The Hillbilly Wedding. Good times. Jack used to take us to the Indy 500. We saw one of the last races there that was open. We also saw the first Indy Racing League Indy 500. I think Arie Luyendyk won that one. All I remember was that each person could bring in a cooler. So we all packed a full cooler each. We didn’t realize we had to walk like 2 miles to get to our seats. That’s a long walk with 30 pounds of cooler hanging off your arm. Those coolers were quite a bit lighter on the way home. At one of the Indy 500 weekends, we had another buddy along with us. Jack kept calling him newt. None of us could figure out what the heck he was talking about. Finally, someone got the nerve up to ask him. He said, “You know…Knute. Like Knute Rockne.” Our buddy went to Notre Dame.

Jack was a piece of Americana and he loved American stories like The Natural and The Rocky Saga. He would quote Rocky 2, “Hey Father Carmine, can you send down a blessing, y’know, in case I get beat up tonight.” Well hopefully Father Carmine is looking after Jack now. Rest in Peace Jack, We’ll miss you, and we’ll definitely be thinking of you every time the Football team runs out of the tunnel under the “Go Blue M Club Supports You” banner, every time we crack a brew or chomp on a #11 at the tailgater, every time 112 well-schooled well-disciplined Michigan bandsmen hit the field to what John Philip Sousa called the greatest college fight song ever written “The Michigan Victors,” and especially when the Michigan drum major leans back and mashes his tassel into the ground. Jack, we know you’re up there in Football Valhalla next to Bob Ufer, enjoy the view.

the usual

2010-07-14T16:55:00.001-07:00

Ever since I was a high school idiot, I’ve had a lot of crazy thoughts and viewpoints. The one that I’ll stick by to this day, is that Rover is the best name for a dog. It’s cute, it’s descriptive, and it’s classic. Dogs rove, that’s what they do. Rover has a nice ring to it. I’m pretty sure if the kids beat me down and I cave and buy a dog, I’ll name it rover, or insist that it be named rover. I assumed that although Rover is a bit old school, that it was still a popular dog name. I thought wrong. It’s not in the top 60 according to some made up statistic I found on the net. That is shocking to me. Scooter was ahead of rover. Have you ever seen a dog scoot? I would think that if a dog scooted, it would need some salve and a trip to the vet. If you must know, Max was number 1, and Buddy was number 3. Buddy, chalk one up for the lazyasses that don’t have the wherewithal to name their pet, great job guys, you made it to 3. So anyway. Yesterday, I was thinking about what the best cat name would be. I was thinking about cats because my boss sent out an e-mail that was titled “The SEC’s CAT.” I was like, wow, the SEC got a Cat? Mary Schapiro is really making herself at home over there. So I was trying to guess what the SEC would name their cat. I came up with…drumroll please…Boots. I think boots is the best name for a cat much like Rover is the quintessential name for a dog. Now I know you’re saying that a cat has to have different colored paws to be named boots. I disagree. That’s cat stereotyping and it’s wrong! Any cat can be named boots. All you have to do is buy some inappropriate rubber rainboots and put them on the cat. Boots. If you must know, boots was 18 on the list of cat names.

WARNING: MAJOR GEAR CHANGE.

Speaking of things that are wrong, I am really torn about something that I saw yesterday. I was walking to the train on Adams, which is a very crowded street at 5pm every day. The sidewalks are crowded with commuters like me cruising to the train. Well yesterday, they had some protesters out there. They were protesting abortion. I don’t like abortion. I love babies and I don’t like the idea of babies being killed. I’m not going to get into it any more than that. That is my personal opinion, it’s not the current law, and obviously women have the right to choose under the current law. Ok. So the Pro Life people were holding up huge 6 foot placards and on the placards was a picture of a dismembered baby. It said something like “An abortion after the first Trimester.” I really had to avert my eyes, because I can’t look at it. There were other pictures that looked equally gruesome. I’m just not sure about that tactic. I know it’s offputting and makes the point, but why not go the completely opposite route? Why not show cute babies and say, Abortion is bad. I just think that when you get out there with a very polarizing image, it undermines your objective. It’s very easy to attack the campaign if it is as extreme as the one I witnessed yesterday. I think people like myself who are otherwise pro life might say, I don’t agree with abortion, but I also don’t agree with the pro life campaign I saw yesterday. The thing that really weirded me out was that the people holding up the signs were like 16 year old girls. Pretty much all of them. I really, really wanted to interview one of them. I would’ve, but I had to get to the train. I really wanted to know what I always want to know…what their deal is. This cute, regular looking, 15-16 yr old girl is holding up a giant placard depicting a dismembered baby. What is her deal? Why is she doing it? Because her mom told her, or her church, or her pastor? Is it because she really feels that abortion is so horrendous, that any means necessary to shake the public consciousness awake is acceptable. Somehow, I don’t think it’s the latter. I’m thinking her mom, or other mentor has dragged her into the cause. I doubt she would admit it in an interview, and I doubt she would’ve said anything other than “get out of here.” Still, it was weird.

Phew. Let’s change gears again. PDA couple. So today, I got the gumption to stand right next to the PDA couple on the platform. They were touching as they practically always are. Man had his hand around woman’s waist and he was talking. He was telling a story and I couldn’t make it all out. It involved dude rummaging through some woman’s closet, was it his daughter and he was looking for drugs? Was it his wife? Was it his sister, mother, aunt, or other female? I dunno. The train came and I was so bummed cuz I wanted more info. The other wonderful thing that I heard was…I’m pretty sure I heard her call him “bunny.” I’m pretty sure. The other thing I garnered, not that this is at all revelatory, was that they are definitely in their own world. I know this is obvious from their excessive PDA, but even their speech, their mannerisms, you name it, they don’t notice anyone else around when they are together. I’m feeling a little like a puss cuz I should approach them and find out what their deal is, I should’ve asked that protester girl what her deal is, and then the physically challenged dude. I can’t decide if it’s better drama to drag it out like I am, and give little snippets of information, or just ask all the questions and move on. I’m thinking it’s the former. We’re all voyeurs on this one, and I think we like it that way (meaning you, the reader, and me, not me and my imaginary friends, although they’re in on it too). I don’t think we want all the answers in one lump, we want little snippets, little lights flashed into the empty room. I could be wrong. But if I get all the answers, that will be it, and I can’t talk about the PDA couple anymore, or it wouldn’t be nearly as fun, or interesting.

That’s it. You can go about your business. Me and my imaginary friends are gonna play parcheezi.

Death and records

2010-07-13T18:29:00.001-07:00

Wow. George Steinbrenner died. I didn’t realize he was 80. Time keeps moving on. Steinbrenner was a nut, but he seemed to be able to laugh at himself, which is always a good way to have a positive public opinion. I don’t know much about him, other than that he owned the Yankees and had some kind of weird love/hate thing with Billy Martin (RIP) in the 70s; but he will be missed. We lost Harvey Pekar yesterday, who’s next? Dom Deluise? Oops I guess he already died. Maybe Hugh Hefner? I didn’t realize Hugh was 84; he’s still out there moving and shaking, he’s trying to buy the rest of the outstanding playboy stock and take it private. Pretty cool that he actually gives a crap, let alone has the mental faculties to pull it off. Don’t even get me started on his bedroom antics, jeez he’s getting more action at 84, than I got at 24. There’s still hope though. On a side note I guess he picks the cover and reviews every page for every issue of playboy that goes out. Maybe that’s why it sucks. Sorry Hugh, you’re still the man.

I figured out why I was bummed all weekend. I thought it was cuz that girl dissed me and that was on my mind. Well the mind is a funny thing, that was just a projection; I missed my kids. That makes perfect sense. I was going to the track, they would’ve loved that. Then on Sunday I went to the Sox game, it was family day. I should’ve figured it out, it’s weird though. You think as an adult you know yourself and you know what’s bothering you, and you don’t. Adults can plan ahead and prepare themselves for what’s coming. I knew I didn’t have the kids, I tried to make arrangements to stay busy and get out of the house. Sometimes the best laid plans oft gang agley. You think you have mentally prepared yourself for what is coming, i.e. last weekend, no kids, you can’t force yourself to feel a certain way (let’s not argue this one), you can try to take your mind off of it, but sometimes that doesn’t work. So yesterday I had my kids over and it was so nice. It’s like that piece that was missing all weekend was back. I got out and played Tennis with my son. Ran around a bit. We all sat around and watched pawn stars together. It was really nice just being around them. I’ve got them this weekend and I’m hoping to take them on a road trip, I’m thinking of hitting Wisconsin dells. I’ve never been there.

I’m starting to get amped for Lolla. Against me got added on Saturday. If I only had one day at Lolla, Saturday would be it. That day is gonna rock from like 11am on. I’m thinking about bringing the kids. I’d like to. They’d really love to see Green Day, but I just don’t know if they can hang all day like that. It’s gonna be a game-time decision. I’m prolly gonna hit Sunday too. My new fave band Hockey is playing along with Soundgarden and some others. I was driving to the train today and a song came on my ipod, I was like “who is this!?” It was Hockey. More on Lolla later.

Yesterday I talked about a cool record store I happened into. The place was called Permanent Records. It was jamming. I was a little jealous cuz it was the kind of record store I want to own. So last night I was thumbing through Chicago Social and I saw a blurb about another record store called Saki (I think). It is owned by some dude who owns a popular restaurant. I’m not sure if we are at the point where all these record stores can survive. Look at the stores from back in the day, wax trax, that place on Lincoln by lounge ax, that place on Belmont, Rock records downtown, Tower records, Virgin records, that record store in depaul’s loop campus, Rose records, that heavy metal record store, all of these places are gone. I don’t think their business models were significantly different than let’s say Permanent Records. PR was cultivating the DIY décor, they had an area where you can listen to stuff before you buy, they had a lounge area with magazines; I don’t think they had a stage for in store appearances, but that Saki place does. What about the Merch? I always like the t-shirts and random junk they had at the record store, these stores don’t have it. “It’s all about the music man…the music.” I think I just did them all a favor by saying their business model is doomed, they are gonna owe me big.

I stumbled into another store when I was at West Fest. I don’t know the name of it, but they were selling like 15 different styles of $25 t-shirt that no one has ever heard of, with lame ass patterns and stupid sayings. Then they had like 10 pairs of jeans. And that’s it. I guess they might have had some other random junk. They had a TV and a couch with magazines. It’s like “how does this place stay open?” Is it a front for the mob? Who is shopping here? Who is wearing these stupid t-shirts and just happens to be the right size for 1 of the 10 pairs of pants? When I go into a place like that, I almost immediately have a burning desire to leave. I don’t want to make the owner feel bad though, so I fake look around. Then I bolt. Always a good feeling walking out of one of those doomed establishments.

I dig my tv

2010-07-12T19:43:00.000-07:00

I wanted to talk about Angelina Jolie’s new thigh tattoo, but I have some more pressing issues. Seriously though, this was one of the headlines on MSN. I know the average shmoe out there gives a shit about every body adornment Angelina J even remotely considers, especially vajazzling (google it), but seriously, a tattoo on her thigh is front page news? At least Harvey Pekar got a picture next to the news that he passed. RIP Harvey. I never read American Splendor, but I saw the movie. I should read the comic, cuz I really liked the movie. I gotta watch that again.

Ok well I know you’re all buzzing about my weekend cuz I had it all laid out and you know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and men? They oft gang agley. They do. So things didn’t work out quite like I had planned. Friday was easy. I was tired from Thursday, so I just stayed in and crashed. That meant that Saturday was holding all expectations for the weekend. I woke up and worked out, so I got my bs out of the way, then I basically had nothing to do. Well my ps were going to the horse races, kind of on a whim. So, they invited me. And on a whim, I accepted. It was a good time and none on my trifectas came in. The first race had a 35-1 longshot win it. That was a bad miss. I bet a longshot in a later race and you’ll never guess where it came in, dead last as most longshots do. I did pick a winner that paid 9-1. The only race that I didn’t bet across the board was that one. I ended up with a win and a place. $31 on a $4 bet. Not too bad. So my ps decide they want to get some food. Which was good cuz I was starving. My mom, much like moms always do, wanted to eat at the posh spot. Well my dad and I had shorts on and they said no dice. I was on my way down the escalator when my mom says, “let me talk to the manager.” Next thing I know, the maitre’d is handing me a brand new pair of cotton dockers, with tags and everything. So I wore them. With tags and everything. I put them on right over my shorts and I was pleasantly surprised that I could wear 36s over my shorts. Well it was my job to place the bets, so I was traipsing all over the restaurant in my cotton dockers with the tags. People must’ve thought I was brain damaged. Which is fine. I thought it was funny. My dad basically refused to button his pants or zip the fly, so he was walking around like…well you can draw your own conclusion. The best part about it though, is instead of just letting us wear our shorts, they ended up with much more of a spectacle. I guess that’s justice.

Saturday started out pretty good. I was pretty beat when I got back from the track though. I wanted to get downtown and hit the World’s largest block party. Spoon was playing. I got into the car around 548, and I was hoping to be at the blockparty by 645. I figured I’d hit traffic. I called my buddy and said meet me at the block party at 7. The next thing I know I’m driving into Chicago and it’s 615. So I call my buddy to offer to pick him up. So he answers and he sounds groggy. I’m like, “I’ll pick you up.” He’s like, “I’m sleepin.” I said, “I’m coming over.” His response, “Why, to watch me sleep?” So now I’m in a quandary. I don’t have anywhere to go. I don’t want to go to the block party alone, I’m hosed. Plan change. I’m like, “Yeah, I guess I’ll watch tv til you get up.” I get to his place, watch a little tv, then run out and get some beer. Sometime around 7, I figured Block party is toast, so I had a beer. It wasn’t all bad. I spun some tunes, watched the white Sox, drank some beer, could be worse. The thing about block party is…it’s expensive. I guess tickets are $50 now. That’s steep. It includes 5 beers, but only bud products. I don’t like bud products, they basically give me an instant headache, and that’s all they serve at BP, along with barefoot wine, which tastes like it got poured over bare feet. So I wasn’t way broken up about not hitting block party. Once we got moving, it was around 10. We ended up at some dive (I guess, it was new though, is that a dive, I’m still torn on this whole dive bar thing, does a dive bar have to be old and dirty?) The place was called Late Nite. This guy does kind of a traveling 80s dj thing and he was there spinning. My bud’s brother met us, and that was cool. It was a good time. Heard some good songs. It was cool hanging out with the guys, I guess I was a little bit of a curmudgeon because there weren’t any hot women there…at all. I think I got a little tired around 2, and we hung there til like 3. It was cool. I gotta get better at just rolling with things, I just wasn’t in a roll with it mood. I was just in a sorta state of uneasiness like, I don’t want to drink, I don’t not want to drink. I wanna go to bed, I wanna go somewhere else. I dunno how to describe it. Anyway, that sorta carried over into Sunday.

On Sunday my brother, his kids, and my other brother were all going to the Sox game. I went. It was fun. The Sox are kicking serious ass, which is fun. They scored 15 runs. That’s nuts. I kept sneaking away to go down to the little sports bar at Sox park to catch the World Cup final. I watched some of it, seemed like a pretty good match, although the guy in the journal didn’t think so. After the Sox game, I busted down to the bar cuz I thought the game was gonna go into penalty kicks. Well no such luck for the Dutch, Spain scored like right when I got there. I watched the end and my bro came down which was cool. We hung out and I drove him home.

It’s always a cool realization when you come to find that you have no friends. Well not that, it’s just that I don’t have enough, or something. I was thinking I should go out and make some more friends. I guess that would require me being friendlier though, and that’s not gonna happen. The point is that, I decided to go see The Life and Times at this fest in Chicago, and I had no one to go with. I don’t know if I’m agoraphobic, or what, but when I go to a fest or a concert alone, I get a weird kind of nervous. I don’t care though. I just wanted to see the band. My plan was to hit the fest, walk around, drink a Gatorade, watch the band, and leave. That’s basically how it happened too. I did slip into a record store called Permanent Records. Clever name. I was wondering if the name is pulled from the Violent Femmes song “Kiss off.” That was probably on my mind cuz I listened to all of Violent Femmes s/t when I was hanging at my bud’s. Maybe it’s just cuz I was feeling blah, or cuz I was alone, or cuz I can’t really spend money on anything, but I wasn’t as geeked as I should’ve been going into a record store. I love record stores, I always wanted to own my own record store, maybe that has something to do with it. I dunno. I just wasn’t that geeked. It also kinda bummed me out that every card for every band I looked at did not have that band there. The Melvins, Motorhead, the misfits, nothing. It was like someone was trying to mess with me, so I looked around the place, and bailed. I would’ve done some damage if I had some money, well if any of the music I wanted was actually where it was supposed to be. I hung around like a wallflower for like a half hour until the band came on. They were really kick ass. I’m glad I went to the show. They didn’t play “A chorus of crickets.” But they did play some other stuff off of Urban Hymns that rocked. Right at the end of their set it started raining, so I didn’t feel bad about bailing, that was a plus.

It was Sunday, and I hadn’t been to church, so I slid over to Old St. Michaels in old town. I was married in that church. It might seem like I’m a glutton for punishment, but I was glad to be at Old St. Mikes. For one, it’s usually packed with cute women. There were definitely some cuties there, there’s also a lack of air conditioning in there. It got a little steamy. No worries. If you haven’t been to Old St. Mikes you should go. There’s this really cool sculpture at the top of the Altar, it’s of St. Michael and some other Angels basically kicking the devil’s butt. There are lights and stuff behind it and it looks pretty dramatic. Worth checking for sure.

Looking back, I didn’t have a bad weekend. I def should’ve been in better spirits, I feel pretty good right now. I think sometimes you get the summer blahs and they kind of suck much worse than the winter blahs. When you’re bummed in Summer, you’re still outside, in the heat, doing things. In the Winter, you can just get in bed or watch TV and there’s nothing wrong with just riding it out alone. Whatever, lots of good stuff on the horizon, Lolla, Taste of Lincoln Ave. And tons of shows.

Punk is bad

2010-07-09T16:57:00.001-07:00

I have all day to write this blog. It’s so damn quiet. I’m the only one in Compliance. I’m holding down the fort. It’s funny, there were a bunch of us in Compliance a few months ago when I started. One day everyone was going to be out but me and the woman who is out today. All the other people were in such an uproar, and were considering juggling their schedules and stuff because they thought that myself and this other woman couldn’t handle it. It’s like really? You think you are just that important, and if you are out one day, the whole company is gonna go to shit? Whatever. I was the only equity compliance officer on the trading floor for Wachovia (before the company imploded, I swear I had nothing to do with it.) I’ve put out fires before, a lot bigger than what can come up in a prop shop. I better not jinx myself, otherwise I’ll have some kind of major error and be on the phone with the exchange for the rest of the day.

First things first, news. They finallllyyyy announced the lineup for Riot Fest. Bad Religion is headlining and I will def be at that show. Some other notables: The Lawrence Arms, Smoking Popes, Circle Jerks, Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Less than Jake, Articles of Faith, riverboat Gamblers, off with their heads and many others. The flyer says that more headliners will be added soon. Ticket prices have gone up and I’m kinda chaffed about it. Last year, the first round of 5 day passes were going for $80. That’s a crazy bargain considering there are 21 shows (although it is impossible to be at all 21 unless you can bilocate). The passes that I ended up buying last year were 110 each and I’m not sure we got our money’s worth. This year, I’m thinking I might just buy tix for the individual shows. I gotta see who is playing when. I’m thinking that the Methadones will be added to the bill at some point cuz this would be a good way for them to go out to a huge audience. Either that or Noise by Numbers will play. Both options are good. Oops. Lost my focus there, so this year, the 5 day pass is 115 bux right out of the box and will prolly go up as they add more headliners. I can’t say I’m disappointed, but I was hoping that they could get the Descendants to reform for the show. I’d also like to see Archers of Loaf, Superchunk, The Melvins, bad brains, fugazi, or any of my other favorite punk bands added to the bill. Check out the rest of the lineup here http://www.riotfest.org/lineup/

On second blush, the lineup looks pretty good. I gotta get up to speed on some of the other bands. How could I forget THE MEATMEN. I’ve never seen them. No doubt I will be catching that act.

I really don’t like to talk about the divorce, but since I’m on the subject of punk music, I just feel like sharing a little bit. The divorce has been contentious and both sides have filed multiple petitions that discuss questionable activities of the other side. Well they filed a petition that mentioned my interest in Punk music extensively. It was pretty dumb, and imho absolutely irrelevant, but it just reminded me of like a Methodist Minister damning the heinous and vile Punk music and all it represents. It will be the bane of man, and poison our youth. That kind of stuff. It mentioned that I wear steel toed boots to shows. You go to enough shows in sandals, eventually you wise up. It mentioned that I like to mosh, and I seriously have not been in a real mosh pit for 8 years or something. I dunno I thought it was silly, but at the same time, I can’t run from it. It also mentioned that I kicked Alkaline Trio’s tour bus until they opened the door. Which I did, but my hands were filled with stuff and I couldn’t knock. They let me on the bus and signed my orange copy of Maybe I’ll catch fire. I may have to call them in to testify. The petition reminded me of the Quincy (old TV show) episode where there is a punk rock gang or something. I think it was this very show that got me into punk rock. It was way over the top about how the music is violent and that people who listen to it are depraved. I was prolly like 10 when I saw the show, and I prolly thought punk was a very bad thing at the time. After time went by, it sorta became the forbidden fruit, and I got into it more and more. I was into alternative music at a young age, bands like The cure, The cult, U2, REM, The Smiths. Pretty tame stuff, then I started listening to the Dead Milkmen. The songs were so irreverent, so short and catchy, I loved it. I still like The Smiths etc, or Smith torchbearers like Interpol, but there will always be a soft spot for punk.

Switch gears. I met some buddies last night for a couple of beers. One of them is 44 and still single. He has been around the online dating block and around and around again. He has some sweet stories. He never had someone send him naked pictures, but he has some stories. I asked him if he ever had someone just cut off contact without a word or explanation. He said it was fairly common, and he’s done it to people. I’ve done it too, but not to people I’ve met, not to people who had reason to believe I would be in contact with them in the future. Those people get explanations, they get a phone call or e-mail that says I’m not interested. I think that’s common courtesy. I’m new to this dating thing though. He said that maybe you contact 50 women and boil it down to like 5, meet them and work from there. I don’t think I’ve contacted 50 women, my ratio of contact to response is pretty good. I mean I only contact people who I think I have a chance of getting a response from, so that works in my favor. Sure I see some smoking 26 year olds that I’d love to contact in more ways than one, but I dunno, I guess I just don’t think I have a chance with them. I guess that’s a bad attitude. I have contacted some women under 30 that have similar interests, but I really don’t think I have much of a chance with a woman under 30, or it makes sense to try to have a relationship with a woman under 30. I’m open though. I’ll talk to pretty much anyone that contacts me. Pretty much.

Back to the idea of a 26 year old. I’ve been thinking about this concept a lot. Especially when I’m walking to the train and there are just hot young women all over the place. They’re head turners, but I ask myself, what would really come of it? Sure, they’re hot, and I’d like to have sex with them, that’s human nature. Other than that though, what is there? They’ll want to talk about twilight movies and Lady Gaga, or television. If there is one subject that I’m not up on it’s TV. Sports, yes, the world cup, yes, trading yes, TV, no. I don’t watch TV shows. They all look stupid. The office is ok, and south park. I was watching Archer, but that kind of wore off. I watch American Pickers and Pawn Stars with my kids, those are good shows, but I just don’t have anything in common with a 26 year old, that I can think of. It’s hard to say though. I don’t judge, so I wouldn’t judge a woman based on her age. I guess at the end of the day it’s like, they should be with some hot young single dude, out partying, having a good time. I’ve got baggage, I’ve got kids, I’m soon to be divorced. I thought I had a nice philosophical discussion to get into on this subject and somehow it slipped through my fingers. Oh well, I’ll have to revisit it.

Wow quantity over quality, always good. I’m gonna be out this weekend, def at the world’s largest block party on Saturday, and maybe at West Fest on Sunday. I should have some more interesting news at that time.

What dreams may come

2010-07-07T19:37:00.000-07:00

I had the best dream last night. All I can remember of it is making out with this beautiful woman for a really long time. It was slow, it was lip biting, it was lips for a long time before slight tongue, it was so fucking awesome. I want that in real life, and I know I’ll get it. That is cool. That is hope. Shoot for the simple things you know you’ll get. I know I’ll make out with somebody soon, it won’t be the girl of my dreams, cuz she was perfect, but it will hopefully be close.

Speaking of dream girls, I was thinking about my buddy cuz I’m doing a lot of introspection and extrospection about dating and women. Well let’s start at the beginning. When I walk to work, when I’m not totally spaced-out thinking, I’m looking at women; which is normal, much better to do it now in the summer than in the winter when everyone is so bundled up you don’t know who is who, “Old man!” “I’m not old, I’m 37.” So anyway, there is a woman who is my perfect type, not the girl from my dreams, but close. “She’s my exact…type.” Anyway, she’s really cute, not too thin, perfect shape, nice breasticles, awesome head of crazy sandy blonde hair. I guess I’ll call her walk girl because I usually see her on my walk to work. Our paths cross. So yesterday, I was walking to work and I also usually walk toward my bro’s place cuz that is on the way to work, and sometimes we run into each other and shoot the shit. So I walked by where I usually see walk girl and nothing. Then I’m walking towards my bro’s and even though it’s like 200 yards away I see him. It’s so funny when you know someone, you don’t even need to recognize them, you see the way they walk, how they carry themselves, etc.; and you know. My bro comes up and we start talking. Good chat, talked about the Sox and stuff. Then we part ways. Well I start walking north on Dearborn. I see a cute girl and she’s walking into the bank. It’s her! It’s walk girl! Total bonus. So that was nice. Anyway, the point of the whole thing is that have you ever heard of anyone actually hooking up with their dream girl or someone they see just walking to work? Well I have…

My buddy had a girl on the train that he didn’t know; all he knew is that she was hot, and that he wanted her. They rode the same train and he would see her often. I dunno how often. Well he would tell people about her and she became known as dream girl. My bud didn’t like this, so he would call her train girl. I dunno how it happened, but eventually she sat next to him or something. They struck up a conversation. They got to know each other on the train and eventually went on a date. I think they saw each other a few times, it didn’t pan out. I think she was a little nuts and she had a lot of male “friends” which sometimes is weird. It’s a good story though and maybe there is hope for me and walk girl.

I was going back through my blog because I wanted to see what online dating story I told. I couldn’t remember, there have been a lot of connections, which is cool I guess. It could be worse, I could get absolutely 0 interest. At least I’ve had 5 or 6 women who were interested enough to message back. I’ve met a few women, one sent me naked pictures which were much appreciated. I’ve had some success, I shouldn’t get down about the ones that got away. Oh yeah, update, so a few blogs ago I wrote about how I met this woman out at a fest and we really connected…well I guess I misread that one. Either her texting, cell phone, e-mail, and voice mail are all broken, or she just never wants to talk to me again. Which makes me so want to chuckle. It sucks, cuz she was cool, and I don’t really understand what I did, but it’s funny because life is crazy and when you try to explain it, sometimes it defies explanation. We were sending cute little texts back and forth after the fest and she texted something like “Are you gonna hat yourself tomorrow? :P” I was like “hat?” I was still buzzing even though I switched to Gatorade, it was late, I had no idea what she was talking about. I was surprised she was still awake, so I wrote “Go to Bed!” That’s the last contact I had with her. I think I said it yesterday, there was more to it than that. I don’t think she liked that text, but I don’t think she liked me either, and that was just the last straw. There are so many women out there though. I just gotta keep looking, and in the meantime, if I have a couple more sweet dreams, that’s fine too. Something to tide me over.

Guy who is me

2010-07-06T16:09:00.001-07:00

I’m sorta still smarting from this online dating thing. It’s pretty crazy when you think about it. So many factors and so many things can go wrong. I’m def with the guy that said if a girl likes you, she helps you out. It’s like, one thing, one stupid text is gonna derail the whole thing? It could, but in reality, there was more than that. It is a combination of things. Then when you start to let go, and move on, you start your own list of things. I guess that’s a normal coping mechanism. “Well she did have huge boobs, and a great taste in music, but she had dogs and texted during our conversation.” Seriously, I know it’s a bad habit, and I do it, but it is so disrespectful to text when you are hanging out with someone one on one. Sometimes it’s necessary, and if you are good friends with the person, they prolly understand, or they’re in on it, “I’m just letting Charlie know where we’re at.” If that is not the case, and you just start texting when you are talking to someone you don’t know, then that person is def feeling like they are not as important as the person in the text. That sucks. I’m def gonna make a point of not texting when out with people, it’s becoming one of my biggest pet peeves.

Back to the texting thing. I used to think that e-mail was the best way to communicate. I feel that I do well with the written word and that my thoughts will be readily understood. I’m starting to doubt that now. I don’t have the desire to come up with the number, but I did find a statistic that said that 84% of people think their texts are misunderstood. I don’t know how to handle this, other than to keep the texting to a minimum at least until someone has a good understanding of me. The problem is that people are going to infer their own tone. Tone, is probably the easiest way to misunderstand a text. You can say something like “Get outta here.” Some people might take that for what it is, an old way to say, “Aw come on, you’re pulling my leg.” Some people might take it literally that you really want them to leave. Some might see it as disrespectful. It could be read as lame, an old, trite catchphrase. It could be read as uneducated or low class slang. You just don’t know how people are going to run with a simple comment. The person could have other issues in their life. Maybe they are pining for a lost love or going through some other major changes. Texting can be tricky. I’m going to tread lightly going forward.

The boss is out this week. That rocks. I was thinking about it today, and my boss is really cool. The stress level is very low in my job, and my boss does not really raise that level at all (as most bosses do). But today on my way in, I felt less stress. I feel like it’s going to be a less stressful week because the boss is out. I guess that’s just buried in my genetic code. Lotta people wearing orange today, The Netherlands is playing a huge match to make it to the finals of the world cup. It would be cool if they won, cuz there are a bunch of people in my office from the Netherlands. Safe to say the game will be on every TV and productivity will be impacted. I should be getting hooked with a massage today too. I really need it. My rotator cuff is messed and I just don’t feel like giving it a rest. I’m hoping that the thing just figures itself out. My wrist is bugging me too, which sucks. My Nephew started playing lacrosse and I got out there and threw the ball with him. It was really fun, but the impact of the ball hitting the stick took its toll on my wrist. I’m thinking all it needs is a little rest. I threw a little lefty and surprisingly, my left hand is still pretty good, after all these years. I should try to just throw lefty, that would minimize the stress on my wrist. The bummer is that righty, I can put the ball wherever I want, not so much lefty. I guess that’s how you develop the skill though.

My weekend was pretty good. Saw an awesome fireworks show on Sunday. My brother belongs to a country club and they have a private show for the members and their guests. You’d think it would be short and sweet because of the cost. Well the thing lasted like a half hour. They were shooting off all kinds of awesome stuff. It might’ve been the best fireworks show I’ve ever seen. It’s not like there is one show that sticks out from another though. They’re pretty much all the same. I saw the Karate Kid over the weekend. It was ok. It’s really hard to mess with the original on that one, they did take the story in a couple of different directions, but at the end of the day, it was the same thing. If you were wavering between seeing it in the theater and renting it, rent it. Or better yet, rent the original. I took a poll after it, original or new. My oldest and middle children liked the new. My youngest preferred the original, as did I. Even split. Well…sort of.

I hung out with my old friend and his family over the weekend, and that was very nice. It was a nice break and a good way to get the kids out and active. My bud is married w 3 kids and lives in a nice neighborhood with a community pool. It was a non-stop rock and roll party. We got there and cruised to the pool. Grilled out, swam, played some bags. Then we cruised back to his place. He got a bonfire going, we did the s’mores thing and just generally chilled. They wanted to know how things were going, and it was nice to get some things off my chest and just tell my side of the story. I know the other side is being told and I don’t know how I’m being represented in that story. It was just nice to talk to my friends and hear their stories as well. It was therapeutic for sure. Didn’t do much for my sleep though. My middle child has issues with food, like he overeats and then gets sick. So we were up all night on Saturday running in and out of the bathroom. Nasty business.

I totally forgot to write about what inspired me to open the document in the first place. So I was smarting over this online dating thing. I just started thinking about how it’s still early, I’m not even divorced yet, etc. I got a tinge of hope from this, that tinge that says things will get better. I know they will, but it’s just hard when happiness is always in the future. I want to be happy now. I want things to be simpler now. Oh well, some good stuff coming up this weekend. Good distractions for sure. Old St. Pat’s block party, and this street fest that has The Life and Times and we were promised jetpacks. I’m hoping to hit all of the above. We’ll see. Life is good, no boss.

What do these do?

2010-07-03T05:03:00.000-07:00

I think I just consumed about 8,000,000 calories that were like 90% fat. Aka a ham and gruyere croissant. The thing was damn good, but it’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to pork consumption today. I washed it down with 3 slices of bacon as well. And I shit you not, we are having Slavingen for Lunch. I work for a dutch company and due to the Netherlands playing Brazil in the World cup, we are having a dutch lunch. Slavingen, for those who don’t know, (a category that included me about 10 minutes ago) is a pork cutlet wrapped in bacon. That’s right, Bacon, it’s for breakfast and lunch. I’m knocking this blog out early so I can enjoy my weekend. Also so I can turn my attention to the world cup, which will be on every TV in the place.

Speaking of the world cup and sports, I made a crappy attempt at becoming a sports radio announcer last night. It’s the typical scenario, my brother was going to this bar to try out for WSCR the score in an open tryout. I was hanging there with him and my buddy. My brother got up there, and he did a great job, he was prepared, he had funny jokes, he had props, he knocked it out of the park. After a couple of beers and a complimentary watered down drink, I decided to try my hand at it. There were a bunch of people there, and I didn’t want to have to wait. I went up to the guy running the show and asked if I could get in there. He was like, “sure, fill this out.” I filled out the form and brought it back. He’s like, “when do you wanna go on?” I was like, “whenever.” Him, “How about next?” “Sure.” So I got up there and I thought I would do ok cuz I didn’t have a script and I just wanted to try to be a little over the top. I don’t think I did too good. I tried talking about the blackhawks and I sorta messed that up. Then the woman gave me the 30 second sign and I talked about the world cup and sorta just made fun of it. I had my flip camera with me and I filmed it, so I’ll try to post it online. It was fun though. It’s always good to get up in front of a group and make an ass out of yourself.

Speaking of which, I did get some angst out last night on the drums. I practiced for a bit while I was trying to update my ipod. I’m going through the agonizing process of getting my music transferred into itunes on a new computer. It’s so fucking annoying. I think Apple makes it hard on purpose just to protect copyrights and force people to download a song 10 times from itunes. I feel like I’m being held hostage by Apple when it comes to itunes. I wish there was a competing platform that worked with ipods. I should just switch to zune. Anyway, so I transferred a bunch of tunes using a portable hard drive, and then itunes couldn’t locate them anymore so I transferred them to the actual hard drive on the computer. Then I had to reload them into itunes and I didn’t know which files were working and which weren’t, so now my itunes is a complete disaster. I have copies of songs that can’t be located, and multiple copies of some songs from different locations on the hard drive. Good times. Good times. I dled a bunch of stuff that’s gonna be at lolla, and now the computer can’t find that. It’s so fucking frustrating! It’s totally a conspiracy. I figured out who’s trying to get me….it’s Apple!

Big plans for the weekend. Lotsa fireworks is what I’m thinking. We might go to fireworks on Saturday and Sunday. I bet some people are having their fireworks tonight. I think my kids are getting to the age where they’d rather blow off fireworks than watch them. Isn’t that any age though? I think my kids get bored by fireworks. When I was a kid I absolutely loved them. Still do. I have my faves, love to sit out in the field and get bitten by mosquitoes; it should be a good time. This year I’m prepared with glowsticks. I just have to find the damn things. Every year, my kids are the only kids that don’t have a hundred glowsticks each. Then the other kids who do have hundreds just absolutely hoard them. I really don’t get it. Some rich woman last year totally chafed my butt when she wouldn’t sell me any of her glowsticks and all her grandkids or whatever were swimming in them. I’m going to encourage my kids to give them to out to the glowstick challenged, my form of altruism. So yeah, I just gotta find them. See last year I was at Jewel (grocery store) and they were selling the glowsticks for like 50 cents a pack (on July 10 or something), so I bought a bunch. I better make sure they still work and make sure I can find them. I guess that’s on the agenda for tonight. If I’m still alive after eating all this saturated fat.

Peg

2010-07-01T15:59:00.001-07:00

I had to run out to the bank and I took a little detour through Millenium park. I heard some music. Hauntingly familiar. I followed the siren’s call and it was a little Jazz band, prolly college age and they were playing Peg by Steely Dan. It sounded really good and the drummer was groovy. I stayed there and listened to the whole song. 2 other people were there with me watching, and then there were probably 20 people within 30 yards that were sitting around enjoying the ambience, chilling on the park benches, etc. When the song stopped, and I must say it stopped abruptly, whereas I believe the Aja version fades out, not one person clapped. I have to admit that I was too much of a puss to be the only one clapping, although my conscience was telling me to clap. I laughed to myself cuz it was fucked up that a 15 piece jazz band should run through a pretty solid rendition of Peg in front of people and not a one of them clapped when they were done. Bizarre.

Lately I’ve been getting kinda down cuz I can’t seem to get one of these online relationships to work. Well I know that that statement right there has a horrible assumption in it, relationship. I know I have to tone it down and just take it one step at a time, not everyone is gonna realize that I’m the bee’s knees and sometimes there’s a language barrier, I’m talking about miscommunication. Well from now on I’m going to temper my expectations and take it slow. I don’t like to generalize, but maybe there is something to be said for the likelihood of insanity among those who go online looking for romance. It’s like, you’re divorced with three kids, your ex must’ve just been a big jerk and you are just dreamy. Oops, that’s me. Seriously though, chances are that the people that seem so appealing when you read their profile, might have some serious mental hang-ups. More than likely, these hang-ups make dating and meeting people the old-fashioned way difficult, so they go online. I’m not ready to say every person who is looking for love online has a mental problem, but I’m just saying that the percentage is probably higher than in the general population. I know I’m in there too, so what does that say about me? I dunno. I guess my point is that you have to take this into account when you meet people online, and adjust your expectations accordingly.

How about a recap of where I’ve been as I’ve waded into the waters of online dating. I guess I just started getting into it around last February. I got out there on match. I went through some profiles, I couldn’t send messages cuz I was not a member. I could wink, which is basically a lame way to express interest without actually reaching out to anybody. Match also sends you e-mails and in one of these e-mails I saw a profile that def caught my eye. That’s the other thing about online dating, you are basically looking through a catalog, and if the picture isn’t good, then there’s no way you are gonna read all the other crap, you just move on. So the pic was good, I checked the profile, but it was kinda spartan, with some stupid shit in there about how she likes to do public service with her kid to teach her to help others or something. It’s like, that’s nice, and altruistic, but it’s not exactly a head turner. Anyway, she was cute, so I winked. What do you know? A few days later she winked back. This was my first online connection. I didn’t want to pay for Match, and I didn’t want to miss out on this girl, and “She was way into me…She winked.” I also had a profile at this time on OK Cupid, so I slipped it into my profile that I was on OKC, I don’t know how it snuck by the censors, but it did. No contact. After about a week, I broke down and joined Match, just so I could contact this girl. I sent her an e-mail. And she never responded. I was a little bummed about it. Not that big of a deal though. I think I’m working my way up the online dating food chain since then. It’s a work in progress.

I have stories, and that’s key. A lot of people don’t. Seriously, if I had been at work 10 years ago and heard some dude talking about how some girl is e-mailing him naked pictures of herself, I would have been green with envy. Well now I’m that guy, and I have to say, if I can do it, anyone can do it. I also have to say, it’s not that big of a deal. Well that’s bullshit, it’s actually kind of a big deal. I mean come on! I’ll share some of my other stories at a later date.

Miracle

2010-06-30T19:57:00.001-07:00

What I meant to talk about Yesterday, and didn’t, cuz I got all wrapped up in hope, nope, and despair, is that a miracle occurred on Monday. “Are you saying that a miracle occurred here or were you trying to deceive me?” Lately, I haven’t really been drinking. At all. Which is good and as I’ve said in the past, drinking is a waste of time. Well every once in a while, I’ll have a couple of beers. These beers are usually micro brews and for whatever reason, I’ll get just brutal hangovers from like 1 beer. Case and point. I went out with my buddy from Dallas last Thursday. I think I had maybe 5 beers. All micro brews, well 1 high life, if you must know. I forget what I had for dinner, but I’m pretty sure I ate something that night. I got like 3 or 4 hours of sleep and then went to work on Friday. It was Friday, all I had to do was make it through the day. I got up. I felt pretty good. I got in to work, I did my stuff. The US was playing in the world cup, so the whole office was watching it. For Breakfast we had thick cut French toast and bacon. I mowed it down. It was so tasty. I figured any hangover would surely be squelched by that. Wishful thinking. Some time after the US soccer match, I started to feel like shit. It felt like someone had hit me in the head with a baseball bat. I wanted to puke and I especially wanted to leave. I was in survival mode for sure. So I was surviving. Fighting to get to 430, which is when we get to leave on Fri. I’m trying to come up with any possible busy work I can, so I run the position reports. Well one of our positions was getting up there and people started talking about it. The next thing I know, the managing director is sitting next to me trying to determine if the position is being aggregated correctly. It all worked out, and he’s a cool guy, so I wasn’t worried, but it wasn’t the ideal way to ride out a tough hangover.

Back to the miracle. Well on Sunday, I went in to work and I did some stuff. I also figured what the heck, I’ll eat. I had a bowl of cereal and a banana. I bolted and went to my buddy’s place. Luckily he didn’t have any beer, cuz I prolly would’ve had one. Then we went to the street fest that I mentioned the other day. Well at the street fest, I had a few beers. I didn’t eat anything, so I basically skipped dinner. Then we got let into that free area and were drinking beer for free. I def had over 5 beers, and was well on my way to being a mess the next day. We bailed from the fest and it was only 1030. I was def crashing at my buddy’s, so we got another 12 pack. My bud also bought a Gatorade. When we got back., we started spinning tunes, and I just wasn’t in the mood for another beer. I had to work the next day, I was tired. I didn’t feel like having a beer. So I had some Gatorade, and some water. I have to point out that I was also drinking water at the fest, basically double fisting water and beer in the free area. So I’m drinking water, spinning tunes, watching TV and I get to bed around 130. I didn’t sleep well. I might have gotten like 3 hours. I wake up the next day and I’m pretty groggy. Not hurting, but thinking that I will be. I showered, got my stuff, and cruised into work around 7am. I felt a lot like I felt the last Friday, when I was feeling ok, only to take a turn for the worse later. Well, I was trying to avoid that, so I decided to be careful. They had eggs, bacon and sausage for breakfast, I skipped that. I had a bowl of cheerios and a plate of fruit. I was power chugging water and I had a multi vitamin. When it felt like someone had played basketball with my brain the Friday before, I was wondering if maybe all the sugar in the French toast and the syrup somehow threw off my blood sugar and messed me. I was unbelievably tired all day. I kept yawning and I kept nodding off while I was having a meeting with my boss. I never got a headache though. I was tired and beat, but didn’t get a hangover. Seriously. It was a miracle.

Ok. I wrote that yesterday. Good stuff. Words to live by. I drove to work the last couple of days and I had been missing the train. Well today I trained it in. I was expecting to catch up on my book, Atlas Shrugged, but I ran into a buddy and we talked the whole way in. I was feeling kinda crappy, so it was nice to talk to a buddy and get reminded that “I’m a good person, and gosh darn it, people like me.” So before my buddy came along, I was sorta hanging by the PDA couple. I really gotta get a pair and talk to them. I don’t think it will go badly, I think they’ll be ok. It’s just how do you break that shit up? Seriously. I did not ride in their car, but on the platform they were hugging and the guy was burying his face into her neck. I’m just trying to get my head around it. Do they just not get any alone time together? Well. Let me take this one step at a time. If I am going to confront them, I need some prepared questions. I think I could rock it on the fly, but it’s better to be prepared. Question number one: There ain’t no rings, but are you guys married, to each other or someone else? I mean there is no way that they are married to each other. It would have to be an extreme circumstance where their only chance to grope each other is on the train, or they grope each other 27/7. I def think their only chance to grope is on the train and that’s why they do it. How long have you guys been seeing each other? My guess is not long. They are like fricking kids getting busy in the basement, only they are doing it on the train in front of 50 people! Do you guys ever get together off the train? Maybe they have a thing for trains, I’m sure there are other people like that. I dunno if I can ask it, but have they ever had sex on the train? My guess would be…no. The bathrooms on the train are just awful, I have a hard time going into them even when I really have to go, so I don’t see them banging in the nasty bathroom. Well for one, the little bathrooms, I don’t think it’s physically possible, but in the big bathroom it would be. I’m kinda torn on this one. The idea of boning in the train’s bathroom is kinda hot, if you got in there right after it got sanitized.

I gotta find some new characters on the train too. I was thinking I could do a blog where I just interview random people. I would so love that. Only I’m not extraverted enough to pull it off. Well… we’ll see. I think that would be the best TV show, you just interview the postman, or the guy at Best Buy, or the woman who works at the Laundromat. I wanna know what these people’s deals are. At least I think I do. There’s the physically challenged guy on the train. I will def find out what his deal is. Not too inspired today. Luckily, I wrote two blogs yesterday.

Rapid hope loss

2010-06-29T19:16:00.001-07:00

I don’t know what is wrong with me, but I’m going to be at work for 12 hours today. I guess I have some time to make up, so it’s no big deal, but umm it’s gonna be a long day. I got out the door at about 555, and I was in Chicago by 630, that’s nutty fast. It seems like the construction is on hold for a while, maybe because of the taste, and maybe people left town early for the 4th of july and they’re up at their summer homes. You don’t hear this too often, but my commute was too short. I could’ve used some more tunes and chill time in the car.

I was thinking a lot about hope on my drive in. Mostly because of the online dating thing. It’s like when you’re married, there’s basically no hope. Sorry to those married people out there. I guess I should say if you are in an unhappy marriage, there’s no hope. I really think there are people out there who are happily married, I can’t think of any right now. Well my parents, but they’re old. I know a lot of people with workable marriages, and I think that’s the best most people can hope for. You have your stuff, she has hers. When you’re together, it’s good, you’re happy, you get along. When you are apart, it’s nice, it’s refreshing. The sex is good. Anyway, this wasn’t supposed to be a diatribe on Marriage, it was about hope. I need to learn to couch my hope a little. Tone it down. Especially when it comes to women and dating. When I talk to people about it, like my bro or my bud, they have the attitude. If you don’t know the attitude, it’s from fast times at ridgemont high. Damone is teaching Rat about women and he says “You gotta have the attitude. The attitude is that you don’t care whether she comes, stays, lays or prays; whatever happens your toes are still tappin’. That’s the attitude.” I don’t have the attitude. I care. I feel like I could say so much more about this, but it’s almost something you can’t describe. Either that, or I just don’t want to go there. It’s not just women either, it’s life. Like I’ve mentioned before, my buddy who doesn’t really have goals in life, and I don’t think he’s on this hope roller coaster like I am. He’s just kinda hangin out. He’s got a good job, and makes good money. He’s got a place and all that. We were talking the other day, and he does have regrets and stuff. Well you know, it’s the grass is always greener scenario. My life is very complicated right now, so I envy the simplicity he’s got going. While he could probably do with a bit more complication and he wishes he had kids and stuff. So today as I was driving in I was kinda thinking it would be nice to have less hope. What a crazy concept. Hope is such a disappointment. There’s the old line, “Don’t get your hopes up.” That’s because you’ll most often be let down. The feeling of hope is so good, it’s like for a second you see clearly, like the song “I can see clearly now the rain has gone. I can see all obstacles in my way…” That song perfectly encapsulates hope. When you have no hope, at least you don’t get the bait and switch. At least you know that things suck and you might as well just accept it. When something good happens, it’s a gift, enjoy it, move on. That does not seem like a horrible way to look at things. It’s pragmatic. I’m definitely not pragmatic. I believe in things. I get my hopes up. I get hurt. Then I get up, and I do it again.

I wonder if having too much hope, the roller coaster scenario is just as destructive as being completely hopeless. I’m gonna google hope after I’m done with this and see what people have to say about it. I know what it’s like to feel hopeless too. And that sucks. It sucks to get your hopes up and be disappointed, but to be in the blackhole without hope is probably worse. I’m trying to remember what it’s like and it’s hard to describe. It’s like you don’t feel good about yourself or your life. You feel like you made a mistake that can’t be corrected, and then you dwell on it. Then you look forward and all you see is black. It definitely feeds on itself, because when you feel like you made a mistake, you feel like…a failure. That feeling clouds your opinion of yourself. It makes you project that failing into the future, which crushes all your dreams. I’ve certainly lazed around and felt sorry for myself, but some people can’t even get out of bed. They are being crushed by this hopelessness. Severe depression. When I think about it like what I just described, I can’t picture a pill fixing it. I’m not a big fan of pharmacology. I’m not a psycho, I take medicine when it’s prescribed and all that. I really have a problem with medicine that changes who you are though. That scares me. The idea of not being me anymore scares me, it always has. I’d rather deal with my shortcomings than take a pill and have a perma-smile plastered on my face. It’s a tough call, some people really need it just to function. People with severe anxiety, they probably need something. I feel like there is an answer to this and it’s just on the tip of my brain. The whole hope vs. nope. I’m going to call it nope. That is the middle ground between hope and despair. Some people are hopeful, they have dreams that aren’t realized, they get excited about things that don’t pan out and then they do it again. I’m in that category. Then there are people who say nope, you can’t make me care, I’m not going to get too up or too down, I’m just going to stay on the moving sidewalk and see where I end up. Then there are people who despair, who have no hope and feel like they’re on a downward spiral into oblivion. If you are in that category, please get help.

I guess I was due for a more philosophical blog, and that was it. I can’t really think of a way to wrap it up. It’s like in Monty Python’s the meaning of life when the waiter walks across the country to show the house where he was born. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzlCdWwYn2I

I need some shleeps

2010-06-28T19:21:00.000-07:00

I had a crazy idea for a new blog. It might already be out there. Well, let’s backtrack a little bit. So I met somebody. Online, and…for real. Wow, what a concept. Anyway, we hit it off pretty good and it turns out she’s a blogger. That got me to thinkin, we should do a blog together, and then I further considered, why don’t we blog about our relationship from our viewpoint, without the other being aware of it. Umm. Let me clarify. Basically we start dating, and I write a blog about my thoughts about the date, her, etc. She does the same about me. They get posted to the same spot, but we never read each other’s posts. That last part is pretty key. It’s like if I’m gonna dish on her to my audience, she can’t know about it. Or if I say like, I’m really into her, or she has a kickin body, blah, blah, blah, I don’t want her to know about it. And if she’s like “oh, he’s a nerd, or he dresses like a tool, or he is way too intelligent and handsome” Then I can’t know about it. It will be like the reader is on the inside of the whole thing, while the actual couple is on the outside. I think that would make for compelling reading. If we go to a movie, I might love it, she might hate it, she might tell me she loves it and secretly hate it, well the reader will be in on it. I think this concept would rock. I have to give it some more thought and iron out how it would work. One problem that jumps to mind are the friends. Like say someone starts cheating, or is seeing someone else, but not cheating; I’m sure the friends of that person would let them in on it. And there’s no doubt the friends would be reading it. Maybe that’s the fix, don’t tell anybody about it. That’s probably a good move. Although you want to promote it, cuz it’s catchy. It’s prolly not a good idea for people to know about it. The other bonus is that if it’s private, you can share the juicy details that you might not otherwise share.

I finally got out to a streetfest. Saw some decent bands. Maps and Atlases played. They did not exactly float my boat. I don’t know why people (bands) feel the need to mess with a solid concept like a 4 piece with regular instruments. Maps and Atlases had like 8 people and some woman was playing marimba or something. It was excessive. The music sucked too. When the band was warming up, the singer busted into Zep’s good times/bad times. It was kick ass. I wish the whole show was zep covers. Anything would’ve been better. I also lied about hating the band. I feel a little bad about it. My niece was there and she was excited about M and A, so I didn’t want to rain on her parade, so I said I liked them. Then the new girl asked me if I liked them and I said yes. I didn’t want to be too big of a curmudgeon on the first date. I’ll save that for the second date. I was kinda amped to see David Bazan, of Pedro the Lion. He sucked. I never got into PTL, and that’s probably because they are not good. Safe to say I wasn’t expecting much out of the headliner, Cloud Cult. Crappy name. And…I was pleasantly surprised, they kinda reminded me of The Flaming Lips, crossed with Neutral Milk Hotel, which is an awesome combo. Some of their songs were not good, but a number of them were. I gotta check them out and DL some of their stuff. Yeah. So as I mentioned earlier, I met someone at the fest. It worked out really well, she had friends in high places and hooked me and my buddy up with bracelets so we could drink for free. Very Cool! After the fest we toyed with the idea of going to Exit. Discretion was the better part of valor and we went our separate ways instead. She is really cute, so we’ll see what happens.

I think this week and next week are gonna be crazy slow at work. Today already feels dead, and I’m a little sleepy from the late night at the fest. Just trying to gut it out today. Shouldn’t be too bad. There is some synth dude playing at Pritzker pavilion. It’s just outside my building, so I went and checked it out. It was ok. It got old pretty quick. Dude was sorta like Jan Hammer on downers. He just kept looping synths over each other and throwing drum tracks in there. It reminded me of that program acid, where you take the loops make your own tunes. He might’ve been using acid, the program and the drug, for all I know. He did have a computer up there. I’m counting the minutes until I’m out of here. I could use a little nap.

GBV

2010-06-25T16:04:00.001-07:00

I just don’t know where to begin today. I was reading Savage Love in the Reader. I rarely ever miss it. Well this week’s was a little lame. It was about FTMs. I thought I was up on all the jargon, acronyms, and everything else in SL, but I had no idea what this was. The first question was about a gay couple who were having trouble getting it on because one dude wasn’t attracted to the other cuz he was an FTM. Well it didn’t take long to decipher that FTM was “Female turned Male.” Which makes this relationship out of control on a number of levels. So a woman got changed to a man, or identifies as a man, and is gay and therefore dating a dude. This is basically a heterosexual relationship. Well…not really. Cuz the problem was that the gay dude wasn’t attracted to the other “dude’s” girl parts. I dunno. I guess everybody’s got problems.

Since we’re talking about couples, let’s transition to the PDA couple. It’s Friday, it’s Summer, the PDA couple was in full fondle today. Well I’m assuming. I was walking down the platform to find a good spot to get on the train. Then I saw the PDA couple. In case you didn’t know, the PDA couple is a couple on my train who are over the top touchy-feely every day, in the morning, at 7 am, on the train, in front of everybody. So today I’m thinking, maybe today’s the day when I can hang by them, do some reconnaissance work, and maybe talk to them. So I’m walking up to them and they did look cute all standing there next to each other, arms around each other’s waist. As I got about 10 feet away, the dude, who is pretty tall, leans down and starts repeatedly kissing the woman’s forehead. I had to just keep going. I wasn’t going to stand next to that, or interrupt it, or whatever. It’s Summer, love is in the air.

Ok. Yesterday, I had to take a psychiatric profile test as part of the custody evaluation for the divorce. It’s a standard thing, everyone has to do it. It’s like 540 questions or something like that. It’s all true false. It was actually kinda fun, and at times funny. It’s tough though, to take those tests and be completely honest. Most people want to do well on tests. They want to get the right answer. So at times you find yourself trying to pick the right answer instead of being completely honest. I def did not go overboard with this, I had to be somewhat honest, although, I wasn’t brutally honest. I could definitely tell that certain questions were trying to probe for introversion. I’m not a closet case, but I would say I tend to be toward the introverted side of the introverted/extroverted spectrum. One of the questions asked “When I feel down, if I go to a party and engage with people I feel better.” Well, Yeah, it depends on the party and the people, etc. I’m sure some people would say “No, they’d rather be alone to deal with it.” I dunno what the right answer is there. But I think that question was probing for introversion. So some of the questions were applicable and caused me to think and then there were the questions like this, “I am sometimes controlled by evil spirits.” Seriously? Who is answering yes to this? I know there are people out there who are completely batshit, but when someone sits you down and asks you this, even if you think it, do you say yes? I see this as one of the many flaws to the test, other than the one previously mentioned about trying to do “well” on the test. “I see animals and objects that others don’t see.” Who is answering yes to this stuff? On one level I can see someone who is not mentally well, they know it, they want to be accurately diagnosed so they can get the help they need, maybe these people would take the test honestly. “Do you hear voices.” Quite a few questions were of this nature which I would term probing for schizophrenia. Then there were the paranoia questions (probing for schizo as well I guess) “I think people are talking about me.” “I think certain people are preventing me from being happy.” “I have identified the person that is out to get me.” Or something like that. A lot of those questions on there. I dunno. It was funny. Some of the questions were funny. I’m trying to think of another category, oh yeah, hypochondria, or just general ill health, it depends. A lot of questions asking about health, I get headaches, I get body aches, I get warm, I get cold, My hands and feet are always hot or cold, I have body twitches, I can’t sleep, I sleep too much, etc. Also questions about focus, I can’t concentrate, I concentrate too hard. There’s also the obsessive/compulsive piece, “I don’t step on cracks when I walk down the sidewalk.” I forget the other OCD questions, but they probably had to do with having things in the right order, or the right places, “I need to have my things put away in the right places or I can’t think” type of questions. I dunno if I’m gonna get my results or not, I’ll have to ask for them. I’ll post them on here if I get them.

I was talking to my boss about the test cuz we are both interested in psychological stuff. He said there was a test invented by some psychiatrists that identifies psychological disorders by asking seemingly innocuous questions. “What color do you prefer, red or blue?” That kind of stuff. Now that is a test that might work (but would probably also generate a lot of false positives). It’s cool. It’s fun to talk about psychological stuff, it def makes your brain work. Speaking of brain, my brain needs a rest. I’m looking forward to a relaxing weekend. I might check out the Sox/Cubs game tomorrow. That would be fun. There are also a lot of street fests this weekend and I’ve been itching to check one out. I also would like to go see The Melvins tonight, or Ween. I think someone else decent is playing too. This Sunday, David Bazan of Pedro the Lion(?) is playing at a streetfest and I might check that as well. Good times. Lots of parties. Hope you guys have a good one.

Don't stop be Steven

2010-06-22T19:28:00.000-07:00

I was just thinking about the people that I insulted at lunch a couple of weeks ago. I just had lunch with them again and it’s all cool. Well it popped into my head that they might have been insulted. For a refresher, we were having lunch, one guy said he was facebook friends with a teacher from High School, someone else said, “that’s cool.” I had to chime in, “no it’s not.” They were like "yeah it is," and I was like “I guess it is for you, cuz you guys are nerds.” When I was just thinking about that, I have to say that although it may have insulted them, it was not said with malice. Then it dawned on me, I never say anything with malice. One of my current goals it to never, ever, hurt anyone’s feelings. Sometimes you can’t help it, like if these people were bummed that I called them nerds. Other times, you want to say it, but you just realize that it is hurtful, and you wouldn’t want someone to say something like that to you. I just don’t get it when people are hurtful. Like there is this guy at work who is really nice and a smart guy, well I guess this guy wears the same thing a lot. I don’t know if it’s the exact same thing, but it’s at least very similar. I think the guy is a snappy dresser, but I don’t pay attention to that stuff. So anyway, to the hurtful thing, this guy wears black zip up sweaters a lot. It looks like he prolly has more than 1 (possibly 5) of the same sweater. So we are in class and this guy says, “It’s kinda cold in here.” Then another guy says, “Well why don’t you just put on another black zip up?” I was just like, “Whoah.” That was kind of out of order imho. I just don’t go there. Except when I call people nerds. The difference is definitely that the zip-up comment had some malice to it, it was not fun and playful, it was like “you’re a freak and a weirdo, and I’m superior to you.” That’s how I took it. I also didn’t take too well when this same dude was commenting about my shoes. And also when I went over the IMs in my review and found that he and another dude were taking shots at me behind my back. Other than those things, this guy is a solid guy. The funny thing is, that I don’t dislike this guy. I was friends with him. Even though he wasn’t friends with me.

On to better things. Does anyone remember Anna Kournikova? She played Tennis and she was hot. They have Wimbledon on the TV today and Maria Sharapova is on. IMHO, MS is a whole ton hotter than AK. I started wondering, whatever happened to AK? She used to be on the cover of people every week, now, she is in the “where are they now” file. Google to the rescue. Shockingly, she is reteaming with Martina Hingis (fivehead, maybe 6), and they are playing doubles at Wimbledon. I didn’t realize that AK and MH actually won Wimbledon twice. I am fairly certain that AK never won a singles championship ever. But doubles at Wimbledon is nothing to sneeze at. I don’t plan on watching much Wimbledon, the world cup has my attention and the US play tomorrow in basically a must-win match. I hope they do it.

Sticking with sports, I hate it when an unknown wins a major championship in golf. I know you are saying, “people actually care about golf?” Well, I don’t care as much as I used to, but it just seems to cheapen the whole thing when some stiff manages to sneak past the best players in the World on the biggest stage. It’s underwhelming. Graeme McDowell? Who the funk is that? Total annoyance. It’s just golf though. I don’t get why people are so up-in-arms over Tiger. I know he disappointed some people, and let down his family, but I really don’t feel that I’m in position to judge him; I’m surprised at all the people who do feel they’re in position to judge him. Umm. I don’t know what Elin is like. She’s very attractive. Most guys would say “how can you cheat on her?” Well, let’s put it this way, if some of Tiger’s women were throwing themselves at you, how long would you last? I’m guessing most guys wouldn’t last too long. Married, single, gay. Most guys would have sex with those women if they had the chance, especially if they were coming on strong. I also don’t get why people are saying that Tiger is all done, or he’s lost his edge. Certainly his mind could be in a better place. He probably doesn’t have the edge right now. He probably can’t stay focused the way he would like to, but he’s still kicking ass. He didn’t play well at the US open, and he was right there at the end. He finished in the top 10. The guy is pretty amazing. He’ll def win more majors, I would bank on that. I’m also ready to bank on the fact that he’ll beat Jack’s record. I think Tiger has at least 5 majors left in him. I would def put major money on the over for 5 majors.

I was gonna talk World cup, but what is there to say? The US needs to handle business tomorrow, “JUST LET ME HANDLE MY BUSINESS!” If the US wins, they are in, I think. Lollapalooza announced their after shows for the weekend. Some good shows. I was a little bummed that Hockey wasn’t one of them. MGMT was. The National, Minus the Bear, Devo, and some others are doing night shows. I think I might check out the Soft Pack. I dig their stuff. Rock is good. Tomorrow night, at the Cobra Lounge, Shot Baker and DOA are playing, they are also announcing the lineup for Riot Fest. I’m way fired up about RF, and I can’t wait to hear the lineup. I hope the Methadones are in there.

I was gonna go check out the bands last night at Pritzker pavilion. I figured it was a chance to check the place out, do some people watching, and listen to some bands. Well the bands playing were The Books and Via Tania. I listened to the snippets on the event listing, and thought…maybe. Then I went to The Books website and listened to some full songs. I don’t think I made it through 1 song. The band sucks. I really don’t like their music. It was so bad, that I thought, “why go to the show? If the people there really like The Books’ music, then they are not people that I want to know.” Sorry to be all judgmental, I don’t mean it maliciously. I feel that people who are fans of The Books can peacefully coexist with me, it’s just that I don’t want to know them. Via Tania is ok, not offensive, but not enough to get me out there.

Ozzie knows...

2010-06-16T20:17:00.001-07:00

I just heard the song second guessing yesterday by REM. It’s a solid tune. They did it at that Live at Olympia theater thing in Dublin. You gotta check that out, it’s pretty awesome. But man, I am tired of second guessing. I’m tired of second guessing myself. As I was going through the divorce initially, I was second guessing everything. It’s so fucking hard. I mean with kids. I knew I was doing the right thing for me, but I was mostly concerned about them. When it came down to it, I was willing to do the Irish divorce and just stay together for the kids and not really have anything other than a business relationship. Then it turned out that even that wasn’t going to work, and my wife didn’t want that anyway. I’m glad that as things went along, my suspicions were confirmed, and my fears justified. I definitely came to the conclusion that I did the right thing, and that fighting for the kids is also the right thing. I have to thank God for giving me the ability to persevere through all the doubt and conflicting stories and stick with my instincts.

Well I had to go with my instincts again, and although I was waffling about it yesterday, every day gets easier and easier. It’s tough, when I was last on the dating scene, you met face to face first, so you knew what you were dealing with (for the most part, unless you were drinking). You primarily communicated over the phone, a land line, not even a cell. No Match.com, Harmony, no e-mail, texting, cell phones. Now it’s a completely different ballgame. Now you can basically have a whole relationship and not even meet. You connect online, you begin exchanging messages or e-mails. Then the big step…phone call. You talk on the phone, maybe for hours. These are almost like dates. Then maybe, she sends you some pix. If you’re lucky, they will be very provocative. At this point, the dude is like, “let’s meet today.” It’s tough though, cuz schedules conflict and things drag on. If you don’t act on that initial spark and nurture it, or meet up and let it flame out, then it just fizzles. As time passes, someone might get busy, they might meet someone else on line, doubt creeps in. Maybe she doesn’t want to meet up. Maybe she doesn’t look like the pix and she’s nervous. She’s thinking, maybe he’s a weirdo, maybe those pix aren’t of him. Maybe he’s dangerous. Communication becomes stilted, it doesn’t flow. It seems like you’re saying the same things, or she says something kinda wack, or you say something kinda wack. Or worse, you text something that gets misinterpreted, and the other side just completely doesn’t get you or thinks you are something you’re not. People were designed to meet in person. Nature intended it that way. Nature didn’t make the cell phone, computer, internet, text message, etc. When you don’t meet in person, things are more likely to fizzle out. Oh well. Lesson learned. Things happen for a reason, and you gotta trust your instincts.

I dunno if it’s better just to not know something, or to know. It’s like if someone is talking shit about you or thinks you’re a dbag behind your back, do you want to know? And when you find out, do you want to confront that person? I give people the benefit of the doubt and I try to forgive and forget. I could definitely be friends with someone who had shit talked me in the past. I think. I dunno. In the computer age, you figure these things out. Like today. I was doing my e-mail review and I noticed that the system picks up IMs for review. Hrm. I went through some of the IMs of people who are no longer here. Some of the IMs were talking about me. When I first started I really felt like people were against me and that no one wanted to help me. It’s hard when you are trying to integrate as the new person and people are covertly against you. It’s hard when you just start, cuz you don’t want to be paranoid. During my review today, I picked up on some conversations where people were going above my head and my bosses head to shittalk the both of us. I had been at the job like maybe a month when this was going on. I know some people got passed over for my job and there were some hard feelings. I was out of work for 8 months. I have a family, mortgage, mouths to feed, bills. I was also going through a divorce. Whatever, it’s water under the bridge, I’m not mad about it, it’s more kind of hurtful. I’m not naïve, I’m not dumb. I knew people were very funny towards me and they seemed to avoid me at times. They didn’t nod or say hi when we walked down the aisle. I didn’t get it. It doesn’t make for an easy transition though. It’s hard to have a functioning team when people are covertly working against other team members. I’ve mentioned before that these people were young, and now they are all gone to other places and hopefully better things. I have no idea what my point is on this, other than, once again, my hunch was proved correct. It doesn’t take a scientist to figure out when people think you’re a dbag though, I think I mentioned that in another blog.

futbol

2010-06-14T19:03:00.000-07:00

I’m going to go out on a limb here and make an observation. I have a feeling this observation may anger some of you, but I must state it for the record. Soccer does not rock. Call it Football, Futbol, or Fukudome, but I’m here to say, that not only does it lack rock, it’s on the boring side. I watched the US vs. England match and it was pretty good. Some drama in there, but the average match just is not doing it for me. Show me a home run. A squeeze play. A strike out. Show me a long bomb. A bone crunching tackle. A deft catch and slick move for a TD. A long run from the line of scrimmage. Show me a breakaway goal. Somebody getting slammed into the boards. Some guys dropping the gloves and pounding the poop out of each other. These things rock. Soccer imho does not rock. It’s like the ball goes out of bounds all the time. The team can’t control the ball and when the ball is in the air, a bunch of people are jumping at it. Corner kicks are just not that exciting. It seems like nothing ever comes of them and when the team scores from a corner, it’s kinda flukey. It’s sorta like the US goal against England, nobody scores unless it’s some kind of mistake. That’s boring. I see skill out there, guys make stupid moves and leave a guy with his jock on the field. Ok. Then a second later that guy loses the ball and it gets kicked clear to the other side. Boring. I just don’t get why this is the world’s sport. Is it because it’s so simple? That must be it. All you really need is a ball. The dudes are in good shape, that’s for sure. I can see why women would watch. To me it’s like the human equivalent of gnip gnop. A bunch of guys kick a ball for 90 minutes and once in a while it goes in. Whoever gets luckiest in the game wins. I was way geeked up for the world cup, mostly cuz I can watch it at work. I’m still fired up for the US. Maybe that’s the deal, you need to have your team who you just totally pull for. It helps. I gave a crap about the US v England match. I wanted to beat those smug bastards at their own game. Well actually Soccer isn’t their game, what is? Torture? What game did Britain ever invent? Croquet? Whatever. I hope I didn’t offend my Soccer loving readers. I know I have at least 1. I need some 5 to 1 games. There’s just not enough scoring. I mean you watch something for 2 hours and the final score is 0-0? 1-1? Oh well.

I felt like crap all weekend. I started this Barry’s bootcamp workout. You’re supposed to do it for 30 days, it’s like p90x for old people or something. It’s actually pretty hard though. I dunno what my deal is, I got food poisoning last week and I thought I had it kicked. Then I did this workout on Sat, it was heavy legs. Then I felt like poo the rest of the day. I did my Sunday workout even though I woke up feeling like crap. I felt ok most of the day Sunday, but not 100%. There was no way I was gonna get up this morning and do it. Eff that. I took the day off. My legs were too sore. They still are. I hate that. The soreness when you just get back to working your legs is the worst, it’s the incentive to keep working them to avoid having the soreness again.

Yeah, so my weekend was pretty messed. I was having an ok day Friday, well not really. I was bummed and I don’t know why. I guess I just had a crappy day or maybe it was because I have this mystery illness. Anyway, I was looking for something to cheer me up. I went on emusic and was doing crappy busywork to redownload some stuff into itunes. Annoying crap that should be easy. I get to the Methadones, and I was like “Eureka.” I had a feeling that maybe the Methadones were gonna do a show before they go to Baltimore. Sort of a tune up. I go on the myspace page and I see the blog entry, “RIP Methadones 2000-2010.” They’re breaking up. Total bullshit. I should have known better, I was having a bad day; I should’ve waited and checked out the website another time. If you are asking yourself if I cosmically caused the Methadones to break up, the answer is yes. I’m joking. It still sucks though. I guess they are gonna do a last show sometime in Chicago and that should be pretty nuts and maybe they’ll play for like 3 hours, so I have that to look forward to.

I don’t want to take it personally, but my last crazy favorite new band also broke up. The Long Blondes. When I heard them, I was like, “OMG these guys are the next big thing.” I told everyone I knew that The Long Blondes were gonna be huge, and that they would be playing stadiums in the states someday. I loved them. Their first (basically) album, “Someone to drive you home.” Was on crazy heavy rotation for me. I was geeked when they released their second album. It was sort of a departure for them and they went with some quirky producer on it. Well it kinda sucked. No worries. They had many records to come. Plus, now they would tour. And tour they did. They came to the US. They were booked at Logan Square Auditorium. I got my tix in the presale. This thing was for sure gonna sell out. I don’t care if Rilo Kiley was playing that night, it doesn’t matter, The Long Blondes were coming to Chicago! I got to the show early, so I didn’t have to fight through the crowd. We walked right in. Not many people milling about. That’s cool. It was early. We went upstairs. Went straight to the bar, got a beer. Good call, get a buzz on before the line is too long to bother getting a beer. The opener came out. The place was basically empty. Just like 50-60 people when the place fit like 800. No worries, it’s smart to wait til after the opener to show up. It’s not so smart to wait til after the headliner is done though. Nobody showed up. Maybe like 100 people. I was shocked. The show was awesome, and I wasn’t really bummed that no one was there, so much as surprised. Well, two or three months later, the guitarist had a stroke or something and the band broke up. I don’t feel responsible for that one either.

The good news. Oh yeah, the good news. I knew there was good news. So when a band leaves you and goes to rock and roll Valhalla, a new band always comes to take its place. Last night I was going through the acts scheduled to play at Lollapalooza. Bands that I’ve heard of, but never heard. I went through a couple that kinda sucked. Then I stumbled upon…Hockey. I’m a fan. They’re sort of a strokes meets MGMT kind of thing. I don’t know if that is a fair assessment, but I’m a fan. The only problem, not on emusic. That’s a bummer. I guess I gotta breakdown and go to itunes, or…, dare I say it?...go to a music store and buy the cd. What an ancient concept, go to a music store, to buy a cd. What a lameass idea.

I can't win for losin

2010-06-10T18:43:00.000-07:00

Aweeeeeeee. Did you miss me? No? Screw you then. J/k, much love to the three of you. Where to begin. There is way too much to say. I made it out to Pritzker pavilion yesterday. First time ever. Some peeps from work said that some blues guitar guy was gonna be out there and invited me to come along during lunch. Good call. Great weather. The music was alright, it was blues, solid, good musicians. The guy’s name was chainsaw Murphy or something. He was pretty good. He’d say, “I’m gonna play the blues for you now, like my mama told me to.” I wish my mama told me to play the blues. Maybe she did, I just wasn’t listening. “Jimmy, play your blues.” “Naw, I’m gonna go ride my skateboard and listen to punk rock.” She wouldn’t let me get a skateboard. That’s how I ended up this way. Pritzker was cool though. The sound was pretty awesome, I wish I would’ve caught that hum show. I’m wondering if they will use Pritzker at all for Lollapalooza. I’m hoping. They issued the lineup for lolla, well the schedule. Some tough conflicts like always. I kinda had hoped to see Lady Gaga. I guess I don’t mind her music and would like to see her production. Won’t happen though, I’d much rather see the strokes. I saw them at HFStival in DC, and they were prolly the highlight. I dunno much about Phoenix, other than it will prolly be an intimate gathering when they go up against Green Day on Sat night. I could be wrong though. Sunday is a bummer as Soundgarden goes up against Arcade Fire. There are a bunch of other minor conflicts, but there always are. Life is about choices.

And now for something completely different. I was reading the Gartman letter yesterday and he had a bit about how some youth soccer league in Canada has added a rule. It’s a rule to control scoring and avoid lopsided games that demoralize one team. This rule is that if you win by more than 5 goals, you lose. Gartman is a right winger, and he went nuts about this new rule. A lot of people flew off the handle and said “well the game will just flip, the bad team will try to score on themselves to insure victory and the good team will try to defend the bad team’s own goal.” Hence, nothing really changes. Reactionary rhetoric. I think in reality what they are trying to do is say, “when you have a comfortable lead, like 3 goals, put in your b team and call off the dogs.” There’s probably a better way to do it than to say “if you’re too good, instead of winning, you lose.” I’m reading Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand right now, and I’m sure she’s spinning like crazy over this one. Penalize the over-achievers and reward the under-achievers, the basic premise of the whole book is how this is pure evil. I’m only like .25 through the book, but I don’t think it holds a candle to The Fountainhead. Maybe I need to reread the Fountainhead and that’s not very good either. This book is basically propaganda and every character is a caricature designed to embody some political viewpoint. It’s kind of annoying. I guess it’s ok. I’m still reading, it’s engaging, well-written, and the characters are well-developed even if they are a bit cartoonish.

The subject I really wanted to talk about today is… bums. I’ve seen some interesting bums lately. I don’t think it’s funny that these people are down on their luck, but I guess I’m just wondering what their deals are. Kinda like everyone I see. Seriously, I do wonder what everyone’s deal is. Some people I can just guess, typical suburban dude, trying too hard to look cool, probably doesn’t make as much money as he wants people to think he does, etc. Those people are boring. I wanna know what the PDA couple’s deal is, the physically challenged guy, and bums. For now. So today I’m walking to work and I walk by a mcdonalds. Right there by the door, there was a pile of newspapers and a bum sleeping next to them. Then it dawned on me, he was a newspaper salesman. I have to say that sleeping next to the pile of papers you are trying to sell probably isn’t gonna move you up the corporate chain, he did look content though. Oops, I didn’t mean to imply he was a bum, sorry, he was a newspaper salesman. Do you guys like to lamp? I know I do. When I see somebody lampin, like steady lampin, I gotta give props. So I’m walking to work the other day. It’s like 730am. I’m just getting over being very sick. And I see a guy, a bum, sitting on the steps of a business, hot tix type of ticket business that wasn’t open. The guy was lampin. He was sitting there. He didn’t look happy and he didn’t look sad. He had an undefinable ethnicity, maybe Caucasian, maybe Latin American, he had a beard, long hair w/ receding hairline, salt and pepper, undefinable age, maybe 40s-60s. This bum was sitting there, at 730 am, drinking a half pint of vodka. The bottle had like 2 ounces left maybe. This was a textbook, dictionary definition, postcard, quintessential bum. And he was lampin.

Fulfillment

2010-06-06T06:41:00.001-07:00

They call me prolific

I’ve been churning out blogs lately and I’m not sure why. I am not good at letting things go, but I have to let this Hum miss go. The problem is that I really wanted to see a show at Pritzker Pavilion cuz it has has those crazy speakers suspended above it, and I figured that a rock show would sound really awesome there. Well HUM is Rock! And I like them. Plus they are kind of spacey and atmospheric and I figure that would best demonstrate the sonic capabilities of the venue. Hence my inability to move on from the miss. There are some other shows coming there that I’m def not as hyped about, but I’ll prolly check one or more of them. I also wanna bring the kids over there cuz it’s free family entertainment. I think they would dig just hanging out in the field with all the speakers, and playing catch or something. That’s my plan anyway. That was the plan for Monday, but the Hawks game got in the way. Bummer that the Hawks didn’t win last night cuz they would’ve had a stranglehold on the Stanley Cup, and now I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous.

On to train misfits. I shouldn’t say the guy is a misfit, because even though he uses a walker and wears Velcro shoes, he might be like the coolest guy ever underneath the façade. I came to an interesting conclusion today. I think yesterday I was wondering what stop the guy gets on at. Well as luck would have it, he gets on at my stop. He gets in at the front car, probably to limit the amount of walking he has to do from the train to the station upon arrival. Today I got to experience his ascension up into the train. I have to admit, I was a little jealous that he got to ride the crane and I didn’t. I was also a little annoyed about waiting, cuz when they bring the lift down, it blocks off one entry so basically all the people have to cram into the other entrance. I hate the inefficiency and get annoyed when I’m bottlenecked like that. I got over it though. I didn’t see where the guy went to sit, but I’m thinking I might have to sit down with him and find out what his deal is. I know, I know that I still need to find out what the PDA couple’s deal is, but maybe I need to work my way up to that. I think I need to find out what this guy’s deal is, and here’s why. I don’t think he has cerebral palsy, so now I’m def intrigued as to how he lost the use of his legs, or why his leg use is severely limited. I also wanna know what he does for a living, where he lives and if he’s ever had sex. I’m a little hesitant about how to approach this guy. At least with the PDA couple, I could just admit that I am curious. With this guy though, I don’t want to come off as using him. Like get to know him just for the story and then blow him off. Which is probably about how it will go. I think that’s hurtful, so I’m def hesitant to do it. I’m sure the guy would appreciate the company, who knows, he’s probably a heck of a guy. To be continued…

I dunno what it is about miscreants and train stations; maybe it’s just the cattle call nature of it all. It’s like we’re all cattle shuffling off to our various pens or whatever. So when we’re all making our way, certain people look normal, and others stand out. Today I saw a couple at the train station in the basement of our building. It was a random dorkish balding dude and he was helping a woman (his wife?) make her way to the station and she definitely had some kind of ambulation issue, i.e. she walked funny. So she had some kind of issue and needed this dude’s (husband’s) assistance to get where she was going. They looked fairly odd, typical bizarre fashion and sheltered appearance, like they don’t get out much, except to go to work. I don’t remember what my initial thought was on them, other than that I’ve seen them before, but I guess I thought “there’s a nice couple.” One of the things that crossed my mind was that they looked like they were well matched, but that’s almost not accurate. I definitely thought that it appeared to be a situation that you see all too often. A guy who is basically normal, but has somehow been forced to choose a less than ideal woman because that’s the best he could do. Or maybe not the best he could do, but he’s such a wuss that he can’t do any better, and “what the heck, Shirley ain’t all bad, or she was the first woman to say hi to me” or something. Then I thought maybe old Shirley is wild in the sack. Stranger things have happened. Maybe dude has that little smirk on his face cuz he knows people are thinking “what’s he doing with her?” and he also knows that they have a great time in the apartment every night and most people stumble through life without real sexual fulfillment. Whoah, can of worms. Did I just say that? Sexual fulfillment? Wow. What a subject. That’s one for another day. I’m gonna have to do some research on that one. I’m gonna leave these two alone and simply consider them the most sexually fulfilled couple in the train station. The PDA couple will be the couple most likely to achieve sexual fulfillment on the train. Go out there and find sexual fulfillment.

Polarization

2010-06-04T21:03:00.001-07:00

It’s easiest to write when you are feeling something. I think that is what people call inspiration. Well right now I’m feeling a little guilty. I was at lunch and we were talking about facebook. The people at work are really smart and they went to Ivy League schools and are interested in intellectual pursuits. So one guy says, “I’m friends with some of my high school teachers.” To which a girl replies, “oh that’s kind of cool.” To which I replied, “No it isn’t.” The girl proceeded to say that it was or something, and I said, “Well you guys are nerds, so I guess it is cool for you.” The thing is, I thought the fact that they were nerds was kind of a given, like I’m bald, I’m old, they’re nerds. Now I’m starting to think that maybe they didn’t consider themselves nerds. I thought being a nerd was cool right now. But seriously, I think this should be included in the definition of nerd. If you have a relationship with a teacher that lasts beyond when you are in that teacher’s class, you’re a nerd. I guess it kinda poops on teachers though cuz that says that teachers don’t form any lasting relationships with their students. Actually they do though, they form lasting relationships with nerds.

I kid because I care. I know people who still talk to their grade school teachers, which isn’t nerddom, it’s just plain creepy. I dunno. I’ve always been respectful of the teacher-student dynamic. They teach. I don’t pay attention. The bell rings, I leave. I guess when it comes down to it, teachers are nerds. Aren’t they? Even the coolest teacher is a nerd, I’m pretty sure on that. I dunno, teachers put it out there, and that usually opens you up to be criticized and judged. You can’t pull your same jokes, your same lines, the same gestures or whatever, and not be categorized. Whatever, I think teaching would be cool. I guess I would just have to accept that some people might consider me a nerd. You can’t really do anything about what other people think of you anyway, other than wear your underwear under your clothes instead of the other way around.

I was gonna talk about this train person anyway, I don’t know if I would categorize him as a nerd, but I was thinking about him today. The guy is prolly 42 or something, and he has cerebral palsy and needs a walker. They need to get that crazy ramp thing happening for him just so he can get on and off the train. Every morning, as I’m walking off the train platform, I see this guy, resplendent, descending from above. Let me get this straight, I’m not making fun of him, like I said, I don’t know if he’s a nerd. I don’t know anything about him. Other than his condition causes him to be extremely slow moving. The amazing thing about this guy is that, well one, he has a job, I’m guessing cuz he rides the train every day. I wonder what he does. I wonder how long it takes him just to get out of the train station. It must take like 20 minutes. I wonder what he feels like when the people are all hustling and bustling around him. Then, they’re all gone, it must be peaceful when all the people are gone. I bet each step is like a little victory for this guy. The other amazing thing is the perseverance he displays on a daily basis. I mean he could just sit in his bed, watch tv, collect public aid, and no one would judge him for it. But he gets up, he might have help, if not, it must take 2 hours just to get ready to go out. Then He gets to the train. I think you get the picture that everything this guy does must be agonizing. Or at least take a long time. I guess it prolly helps him to have a purpose though, and to feel like he’s contributing.

It’s hard to play that game that people play where you say, well, imagine if you were in his shoes. Seriously, if I was in that walker train guy’s shoes, I might be way happier than I am now. Who knows. People assume that just because you can walk normally and are not physically disfigured, that you’re happier than someone who is. Why do people jump to that conclusion? It’s like a priest or a nun, people wonder how they could give everything up like that. Think about how simple a life that would be. How wonderful it would be to have no (or few) possessions, to help others, to pray, to pursue intellectual interests (nerds), and to not have to worry about money. It would be kinda nice. You could say the same of the walker guy, expectations are lower due to his condition, therefore, he probably has a higher sense of achievement than someone who has full use of his/her appendages. Who knows. Happiness comes from within, I know that’s a cliché, but it’s true, money might make some people happy, for others, it creates more problems. Some rich people are miserable, and some poor people are ecstatic. (well maybe not ecstatic, but you never know.) I feel like I’m doing a very poor job of expressing this idea. I might have to revisit it another time.

Pooptown

2010-06-01T16:54:00.001-07:00

What a weekend. What do they say about the best laid plans? They often go awry? Well they do. I had a lot of stuff planned for the weekend. I was really looking forward to it. Some of the plans fell through due to unfortunate circumstances, but stuff happens, it’s all good. Well it wasn’t good, but there’s always another day. I think. Back to the weekend, so I was kinda planning to check out Noise by Numbers in the afternoon show. That didn’t happen. My buddy and some folks were going to Arlington for the horse races, so I met up with them. I was half tempted to go to the races and then roll to the show, then catch some of the blackhawks. Well, after a couple of hours at the races, I was down 60 bucks and I didn’t hit one bet. I guess you could call it a semi hit, or just a bad miss, but I hit a trifecta and didn’t box it, so I picked the top 3 horses, but in the wrong order. I don’t think I would’ve made much on it though, I think it paid like $25, so If my bet would’ve hit, I would’ve made maybe 100. Not chump change, but sometimes if you miss a trifecta it will cost you like 1000 bucks. My buddy made 600. It was kinda funny. Everybody else bailed and it was just me and my buddy. My bud was like, “I can’t believe they bailed before the 9th race, their friend has a horse it it.” The horse was going off at like 35 to 1. I was like, “we gotta bet the horse big and then rub it in their faces if he wins.” So we stayed for the 9th race and bet the horse, Mad Flatter. Well my buddy went to the betting machine and he put his tickets in there that he thought were worthless. Well he hit a bet for 85 bucks. Instead of cashing it in, he rolled the whole amount into the next race. He upped all his bets and added a few too. One of them was a $5 exacta box. He hit the exacta. It paid off like $587. Rock on. Good day. He cashed in and we bailed.

My buddy was kind enough to treat us to some burger king with the winnings and that ended up being the worst move of the day. We kept burping it back up and that put a definite damper on the evening cuz it’s hard to go out on the town and have fun with a gurpy tummy. We did our best though. So we cruised back to his place and watched the Blackhawks. What an awesome game. Talk about rock-em sock-em, back and forth, goal after goal. That game was a must win, the loser of that game was demoralized, which played out as the flyers lost the next game as well. The Hawks are in command and I hope they take it home. They have been playing well on the road, so they gotta take one of two and then it would be nice to finish it at home. We’ll see.

Yeah, so I bailed on Noise by Numbers and that was kind of a bummer cuz I def wanted to go to it. Then on Sunday I didn’t do much. I went into work, which is always a good time. Got some things done. It was so quiet. Very good environment to think. I also took a walk along the lake on Sunday. That was kick ass. There were a lot of people out and most of them were wearing very little clothing. Good times.

On Monday, I had this plan to bring the kids downtown. I wanted to show them my work, I also wanted to go check out HUM at Pritzker Pavilion. Well I didn’t make it to the show. I have been talking about the show for weeks. It has been on my calendar with a special check mark next to it, I totally have been geeked about it. Well, sometimes it just doesn’t work out. I was trying to make everyone happy, which meant that I was trying to line up some way for the boys to watch the Hawks game so I could see the show. When it came down to it, I was the only one who wanted to go, and I was trying to make it happen for selfish reasons. Sometimes when you are a parent, you have to give certain things up, certain things that you really want. This was one of those times. So we stayed home. We ended up getting a football game together with the cousins, which was really good. I think everyone scored a touchdown and although the game ended on a questionable play, and the outcome is undetermined due to a pending league ruling, I think everyone had fun. It was nice to get out and run around. Then we all saddled in to watch the Hawks. As previously mentioned, they won, and are in the driver’s seat for the Stanley cup. We’ll see how it plays out.

As far as shows go, there are still a bunch of good shows coming up. The thing I have on my calendar is a street fest on June 13. The Arrivals are playing and Pegboy. Street fests are a good time, so I’m looking forward to this one. Should be a blast. I’m sure something will come up to derail it, but that’s life.

Running is dumb

2010-05-28T20:07:00.000-07:00

It’s kinda funny when logic fails. Like yesterday. I ran in the corporate challenge. It’s a 3.5 mile race and I trained a little. My goal was to run it in 35 mins. Def to break 40. Before the race our team from the office was all hanging out. Someone said, “I ran it last year, and you should just start out up front. Don’t worry about starting with the right group.” Well I dunno, I usually follow the rules. The rules of this race include setting up the start so that the people up front are the ones that plan to run the fastest, and the people in back are the ones planning to walk or whatever. They had sections set up for different paces. Well I did not heed the warning of the person and figured I would start with the 10 minute mile people, which is roughly the pace I was looking for. I’m guessing about 30,000 people were running in this thing. I could be wrong. So there were prolly 10,000 people in front of me. I just assumed that over the course things would spread out and I would be able to run my pace. Not so much. By starting so far back, I was running into group after group of walker, slow people, random idiots, etc. Running the race at my pace was basically impossible. At one point I was seriously gonna yell out, “Run, you Motherfuckers!!!!!! Or get out of the way!!!!!!!!” Then I thought, I’m wearing a shirt with my company’s name on it. One of these motherfuckers would probably call, or worse, I’d get into a fight and be on the front page. But for me, to be so aggravated as to even consider shouting something out in a crowd, should be enough to indicate what an absolute annoyance running in this race proved to be. I thought I was running a good race anyway. I was keeping a faster pace than training and although I was cramping up quite a bit, I managed to run through it. I really thought I ran the race in about 35 minutes. And if there were about 1/10th the people, I prolly would’ve. I ran it in 41. I have to live with that. I’m def gonna run in another 5k, just to put up a respectable time. So yeah, about the logic failing, I thought that 3.5 miles would be plenty for the whole group to stretch out and I’d be able to run my race. Not so much, I should’ve listened to someone with experience and started up front.

I’m starting to think the PDA people are having an affair. There really is no other explanation. I saw them today; they were in a different car. I was reading my book, so I got off the train after everyone had left. Then I saw them smooching in the other section of the train car. If they aren’t having an affair, if they are married and live together, then there is something psychologically wrong with them. If they are married, and they just can’t keep their hands off of each other at any waking moment, that’s unhealthy. The question that stands out above all others is…Is it love? Or is it Lust? I’m thinking lust at this point. To me, Love is more subtle, less demonstrative. When I think of love I think of an understanding that does not need to be spoken. When I think of lust I think of physical desire that cannot be controlled. I think of doing things and saying things that are out of character. I think of a loss of control, precisely what these people display daily on the train.

Back to the race. After the race, a bunch of people were going out for food and drink. It was getting late and I knew that if I drank, I would be just a mess the next day. Just ran 3.5 miles, no food in my stomach, it wouldn’t have been good. So I had to cut loose and head towards the train. I had time to kill, and I needed to eat, so I was looking around for someplace to hit. I was walking by my old workplace, the CBOE. Not much was jumping out at me. I couldn’t think of where to go, most of the places were closed anyway. I looked down one street cuz I was thinking Potbelly. It was closed. Qdoba was just closing down. I crossed the street. Billy Goat. The Billy Goat tavern is a Chicago institution. If you’ve seen the old Saturday Night Live sketch with John Belushi saying, “Cheeborger, cheeborger, no coke, pepsi, no fries, chips.” Well that’s the Billy Goat. They have a good burger kinda greasy. They have fries now, and the fries were the best thing on the menu. I stress were. I stopped into the goat and made my order. There’s a special language spoken at the Goat, and it came right back to me even though I haven’t been there in years. The guy said, “Whaddayawant.” I replied, “Doublecheezburgerfries.” It’s basically one word and when you say it, they know what you’re talking about. I was pretty amped cuz I was hungry and I hadn’t been to the goat in a long time. The burger was as expected. I prolly should’ve gotten a triple cuz the bread kinda overpowers everything. The fries were the real attraction, and to my surprise, they kinda sucked. They were undercooked. Usually they are crispy and very salty. This time they tasted like raw potatoes. Total bummer. I ran into a guy I knew from the CBOE and we chatted it up. That was nice. I’ll prolly go back to the goat. Maybe in a couple years.

Happy memorial day weekend. Enjoy the unofficial beginning of Summer. I’m hoping to go see Hum on Monday, but the fact that it coincides with the Hawks game kinda screws things up. We’ll see.

Def not worth reading

2010-05-26T19:02:00.000-07:00

The PDA people were back today. I’ve been thinking about ways to sit down and chat with them. I’m not sure if it’s such a good idea. Not only that, but it’s kinda fun to watch them and try to figure it out for myself. Like today, the woman was telling the guy a story about work and she was getting really animated. I found this odd. If they live together, then that type of animation would be exhausted at home, not at 7am the next day. You can make the same argument for the heavy petting and kissing, that’s why these guys interest me. It makes the most sense that they are having an affair, but wouldn’t you want to keep that secret? Riding the train together and dry humping the whole time is not exactly how you keep the affair discreet. So I’ve been devising ways to crash their party. The easiest way would be to kinda case them out, and then try to sit with them when the train fills up, pretend that I got on at the last stop. They usually sit in one of the 4 person seats, and I don’t know if they put their briefcases and stuff on the other seat. I could just ask them to move that shit outta the way. I dunno. If I can manage to squeeze in with them, then I can subtly broach the subject, ask where they are from, are they married, etc. The problem is they prolly are married…to other people. So they will say they are married and might not be married to each other. I was thinking that I could say, “you guys seem very affectionate, I think it’s refreshing to see two people so in love…” Or some shit like that. It’s tough. How do you ask the question? Wheatever, for now, I’m gonna just observe.

“I was just making an observation.” “Yeah? Who are you? Isaac Fuckin Newton? I’m gonna be watchin you Newton.”

I think I mentioned that all shows with Bleach Battalion have been cancelled and I am pretty sure that I am officially out of the band. Well not officially, but I think they cancelled their facebook accounts and went underground again. Oh well. I have so many other things going on that not having the band is a sort of relief. I did really like the music and it was two tons of fun playing with them. The problem with the shows we had booked was that they coincided with some shows I wanted to see. So now I can see the shows. I think I’ve mentioned them like 100 times, Noise by Numbers this weekend, Off with their heads, the arrivals, etc. Pegboy is playing a street fest two weeks from Sunday. The arrivals open for them. I’m way geeked about that. I’m planning on going. Lotta rock coming up. Hum on Monday. That should kick azz.

I started reading Atlas Shrugged. It’s pretty ok. I’m hoping it heats up a little bit. The characters are kind of caricaturish, and the story jumps around. I hate the way they’ve got somebody going somewhere to talk to someone about a specific issue, and then they cut away to background history, for like 20 pages. By the time you get back, you’re like “WTF was she going to talk to him about again?” Oh well, you can’t question Ayn Rand, she has a society of devoted followers who I’m sure beg to differ with my criticisms. I liked the fountainhead, so I’m sure this one will be solid too.

Has anyone followed any of the reality show hoopla lately? I guess somebody won Dancing with the stars. I heard it on TV, somebody was watching it. I heard Erin Andrews give her speech after being eliminated. I dunno. She went through something pretty traumatic and I think in this day and age, people don’t understand how someone could be so deeply affected by what happened. It’s definitely scary to be stalked, and inappropriate to take pictures of someone and post them on the net like that. I just think that after Pamela and Tommy, Paris and whoever, etc. The average person just thinks that seeing a celebrity nude is no big deal, or that all celebrities are comfortable being naked, are narcissistic, or that the public has a right to see it. When Erin Andrews was all angry, hurt, scarred, etc., I think people didn’t know how to take that, or were just like “oh get over it.” It’s kinda crazy, because her privacy was very seriously violated and I think a good number of people don’t see her as a victim. Well she seems to be recovering and at least she wasn’t physically harmed.

I dunno what’s going on with Idol. I don’t really follow it. I was following it the last time, but I’ve moved on. I think they blew it losing Paula, half of the fun was hearing what idiotic thing she was going to say next. Now they are losing Simon, the show is gonna blow. I dunno who the girl Chrystal is, my buddy from work who got let go knew her. He actually did some open mics and stuff in Michigan that she performed at as well. His appraisal of her talent was less than enthusiastic. He thought she sucked. I guess it makes sense that she has broken through to Middle America then.

crap

2010-05-21T17:52:00.001-07:00

The PDA people were not on the train today. It was funny because some dude sat in their seat. Somebody close to me said, “No free show today, that guy took their seat.” The dude was talking about the PDA couple. So I perked up and listened. The guy was telling his buddy how they were playing tongue hockey right in front of him and he sorted leaned in to encroach on their personal space. He went on to say they got perturbed and gave him dirty looks, but did not stop with their smooch session. Some old women joined in and started talking about it as well. I mean, I knew that everyone was distracted by what they were doing, it was just funny to hear people talk about it. I should’ve taken a poll on what people thought their deal was. I didn’t though. I have a much stronger desire to confront them now though. I bet they would get pissed off. They’d prolly tell me to buzz off. I dunno. I just feel I have to get to the bottom of this.

A friend of a friend who is also a friend was in town last night. We were gonna go to the Sox game, but it was raining and there was a general lack of interest in the Sox cuz they suck. Instead of going to the game we went out to Old Town Social. I knew I had an important meeting today, so I took it easy. I did try some different stuff though. Well not that different. I started out with a gumballhead. That, as we know, is a tasty brew. I tried my buddy’s brew, a stone brewing levitation ale. It is low in Alc, like 4.4%, and pretty high in IPA hoppiness and flavor. I def recommend and will have to get one another day. Another tasty easy drinkin brew was the Two Brothers Session Ale. I dunno if I was eating something at the time, but I didn’t get as much flavor as I had hoped out of this brew. I def will try it again cuz 2 bros always brews a good beer. My last beer was a North Coast Brewery Scrimshaw ale. It was just ok. I was expecting more flavor. I was expecting more out of OTS on a Thursday night. We didn’t get it. Well there were some hotties there, make no mistake, but not the usual abundance I’ve seen in the past. Things may have picked up later as I had to bail around 10 pm. I’m pretty beat right now. I’ve made it through two important meetings today, so I’m ready for a nap. No rest of the weary, I gotta go to my daughter’s softball game and then cruise home to watch the blackhawks play hockey. Good times. I can’t believe the hawks are up 2-0. Go Hawks! I hope they win tonight, one game at a time. Should be fun to watch though.

I just don’t have a ton to chat about today. It’s been weeks since I’ve checked in, and I can’t think of anything interesting I’ve done in that timeframe. I’m still going through the divorce. That is taking a lot of my time and energy. I haven’t practiced with the band in over a week. I think our show on the 29th is cancelled. I haven’t heard from them in a while. I dunno if I’m even in the band anymore. I should prolly start looking for a different band. I could just wait for the divorce to get over and then I’ll have more free time for rock. I’m pretty geeked about all the shows coming up. I’m trying to figure out what I’m gonna do for the HUM show. I’d like to take the kids to it. That’s prolly what I’ll do. I think it would be fun. Hopefully the weather will be nice for it. The ponys play this Monday and that should be good, I don’t think I can make it there though. Then I’ve got the Noise by Numbers show a week from Sat. I think I’m gonna hit that show. I think. I forget who all is playing, but Noise by Numbers and the Ataris are the bands I want to check.

I’m in training for this 5k I gotta run next week. I ran 2 miles yesterday, so I think I should be ok. It’s pretty cool, cuz I haven’t really trained much for this race. I ran like 3 times before now. What I think has helped me out is all the walking. Walking 2 miles every day has helped me just pick the running right back up. I haven’t made much knee pain and my hips feel pretty good, I think I’ll be good to go for the race. I’m gonna try to run 3.5 miles this weekend and see where I’m at. I doesn’t really matter, cuz I’m running in the race anyway, and if I have to walk, I will.

Crucial Barbeque

2010-05-14T19:10:00.000-07:00

I’m a creature of habit, so I ride the train in the same car every day, well the train that I catch to Chicago, cuz I have my pick. In the afternoon, I just sit wherever there’s a spot. Believe it or not, I’m not the only one who does this, so pretty much the same cast of characters are in the car every morning. Do you know where I’m going with this? The PDA couple. These people are all over each other. Well let me qualify that, the guy is all over the woman. Like today, it’s 7:00 am, and he leans over and I think he’s gonna whisper something to his woman (wife?), and he starts nuzzling her neck. I’m like, really?, nuzzling on the train at 7 am? I just so want to find out what their deal is. Have they been married for 20 years? Are they having an affair? What’s the longest time the guy has gone (when they are together) without making physical contact with her. I’m guessing that one is like 2 minutes, tops. It’s baffling to me, is the guy that in love with the woman? Or is he just trying extremely hard to convince her (and himself) that he’s that in love with her? Is he in love with her at all? Is it lust? I HAVE QUESTIONS!!! I really want to approach them and ask them some questions. I just can’t decide what their reactions would be. Are they oblivious to the fact that they basically get it on in front of 25 or so people every morning? Just as a recap, we are not talking about nuzzling only, these people have been full on making out, on the train, in front of everybody. I wonder if he feels her up, or she gets him off right there. I bet they do. Cuz otherwise why get all frisky on the train? Why get yourself all amped up? You are just gonna have to walk to work with a bonehenge kickin. I wonder if they would be bummed if I asked them a few questions. It’s like I could give a shit what Justin Bieber’s favorite color is, or his favorite slurpee flavor, or how he uses tai chi to fend off the babes; but I do want to know what makes the PDA people on the train tick. To be continued…

And now for something completely different. Murphy’s Law. Not the band, but the notion. The band is kick ass though. I’ve seen them live and the singer has a case of beer (canned) with him on stage and he basically destroys the whole case and that’s part of the show. Seriously, he starts the show with a case of bud, by the end, all the cans are ripped apart and empty, and maybe the guy has drank like 1 beer. He basically just sprays it all around and rips the cans apart and that is his deal. “Goin to a crucial bar, bar, bar, bar, bar, bar, barbecue.” Ok, that’s Murphy’s Law the band, now I’m moving on to ML the concept. A guy is leaving our work and a bunch of work fell in his lap, he’s like “This is busier than I’ve been in weeks.” I said, “That’s Murphy’s law.” Then I was wondering, is that Murphy’s Law? The actual definition of Murphy’s Law is “anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.” I don’t look at ML that way. I think of it more that life sometimes has inherent irony and that is Murphy’s Law. Like it’s ironic that the guy is leaving and all the sudden he’s busy. I like that definition better. I think ML has a lot of meanings, like when you get something all set up and realize that you forgot one piece and now you have to take it all apart. Another example of what I think Murphy’s Law entails involves when the thing that you least expected to happen, happens, that’s Murphy’s Law. It’s not that something happens to go wrong, but you just didn’t expect it. I think it’s Murphy’s Law when the singer of Murphy’s Law gets a vicious cut from the aluminum beer can that he just ripped apart.

Speaking of rock sounds. I have been thinking about catching the Noise by Numbers show on the 29th. It’s part of the Windy city Soundclash festival. Well I guess that show is at 330 in the afternoon. I’m def thinking I wanna check it. I also might be playing a show that day. Oh yeah, did I mention that the show at the Box Social got cancelled? So stay tuned for updates on that, but it was supposed to be on the 29th and we are also supposed to be playing a show on the 12th at the box social or at some street fest in front of the Congress. I am most def gonna check out the show on the 13th, which is part of the streetfest in front of the Congress, Pegboy is playing and the Arrivals are playing. Should rock. The night before that, Off with their heads and The Arrivals are playing at Subterranean, but we have a show I think, so that is a work in progress. Don’t forget the must see show, HUM at Pritzker Pavilion on Monday. It’s Free!

'Reading is Fun da mental

2010-05-10T20:52:00.001-07:00

I don’t think it’s a good idea to start off every blog with. I dunno. It’s tempting though. Because I don’t know. I went and checked out a play in Chicago last night. It was one of those off-the-beaten-path productions. You know how you always say you want to check out more of those little plays? Well I finally did it. Didn’t hurt that a guy from work was in it and a bunch of people from work got together to go. I’m sort of a fringe player on the work social scene. It’s kinda hard cuz I’m so much older than everyone else. I think I hang pretty good though. They were talking about hipsters and I know hipsters pretty well, with their weird 50s nerd comb to the side hairstyles, their rolled up jeans, their bikes, their just too-hip-for you demeanors. You know what I’m talking about. Well anyway they had some book about hipsters floating around the dinner table. We grabbed dinner before the show. It didn’t make its way to me, but I knew what it was about. So yeah, I try to stay on top of current events and I can hang with a younger crowd. It went pretty well. We started out at this place called Wilde. For Oscar Wilde I guess. It def had an Irish feel to it. Lotsa tasty beers there, Gumballhead was on the menu, but alas they were out. I had another brew by Half Acre brewing, it was a lot like Gumballhead. Light and flaky. Good way to get started. I have to say we had a real nice dinner. All the people there were the peeps that I really get along with at work. It was cool. I felt like they thought I was ok and paid attention to what I was saying. Always nice. After dinner and drinks it was time to hit the show.

I was pretty amped for the show. I didn’t know what to expect. I had a couple beers, so I was slightly jingled, all ready to sit back and soak it in. Well the show we saw was called “The Love of the Nightengale.” It’s fairly well known in certain circles. It’s based on a greek tragic myth, and it def has some hints of Shakespeare in it. The production company is Red Tape Theater, google it. When we got there, I was geeked to see that they were selling beer. Not so geeked to find out that all the beer is room temperature. I think you can byob there though, which I might do for the next show. We get there and the theater is small. I was thinking it looked like it only held 20 people, but in actuality it’s more like 50. The seats are basically right in the middle of the stage. Let me explain how this works if you haven’t been to a U2 show recently. A majority of the action occurs in the middle of the room, and then there is a ring that goes around the room where stuff happens, then there is a sort of balcony on one side that they work in there too. So I ended up in the front row all the way to one side and the actors were like a foot away from me at certain points. I dug it. It must be hard to stay in character when you get a whiff of somebody’s chili-cheese frito breath in your face, but I guess that is one of the perils of the business. The actors did a really great job. Our man from work definitely stole the show, but we all had that figured. Seriously, our man played the Captain and I thought the captain had a really cool thematic purpose. I don’t like to spoil the story, so go see it and figure it out for yourself. I really liked the show, the other interesting element aside from about 10 women dancing around in underwear at one point, was that one of the leads looked like a direct descendent of Joan Cusack. I would’ve put money that she was related. I guess not though. I’m gonna check the show again next week with some friends, so I’ll prolly have more to say about it then.

On a sad note, one of the people that attended the show. The crazy guy who I’ve written about before. My friend from work, got let go. Sheesh, I’m gonna try not to take it personally, but my Asian buddy who liked peanut butter took off, and now one of my other main homies got laid off. Total bummer. This was the guy I wrote about a long time ago. One of my first days here at work, I was just sitting at a table alone. The guy comes up and says, “Do you mind if I join you? Well it really doesn’t matter if you mind cuz I’m joining you anyway.” He is a funny guy and has a fresh, if not completely off the wall, perspective. That first day, by the end of lunch we were talking about whose side we would be on if there was an apocalypse. I was totally on the good side, he said he would be on the bad side. Funny shtuff. We had a bunch of other crazy conversations and he was definitely outspoken on the finer issues. He didn’t have many inhibitions. One time at lunch someone at the table mentioned that they were considering law school. He says, “Don’t do it. If you want justification why you shouldn’t do it, look into Richard’s eyes (our general counsel). Take a good look. You’ll see that the legal profession sucks out your soul.” Richard (name changed) was sitting at the next table. One of the top 3 head honchos in the office got a chance to hear our man wax poetic about herpes one day, I don’t think that went over well. Safe to say, this guy may have alienated a few people with his hilarious antics. One day he said he wanted to start a rumor, so he said that one of my compliance colleagues was a hermaphrodite. Classic stuff. He will be missed.

I didn’t do much over the weekend. I had a family obligation on Saturday, and when that was over, I just basically did laundry. While I was folding my laundry, I was watching Saturday Night Live. After weeks of hype, the much ballyhooed episode featuring Betty White had arrived. I have not watched SNL in years. I think on most Saturdays I’m busy, or just go to sleep earlier. For some reason I’ve come to believe that people who watch SNL are losers that don’t have anything else to do on a Saturday night. Lump me in that category for last Saturday. I’ve seen the video for “I’m on a boat” and some other SNL stuff, so I thought that they still had some talented funny people doing stuff on the show. Not so much. Betty White was pretty funny doing her monologue, but after that it was all down hill. You can google it if you want to see how bad it was. Funny thing, at lunch we were talking about it. One of the bits is a takeoff on MacGyver, called MacGruber. I thought it was annoyingly inane. So I bring it up to talk to the young people about and they were all laughing about it and said that there was a movie coming out based on it. Unfathomable. I really am at a loss for words on that. It was beyond not funny, beyond inane, and I have absolutely no idea how it can be made into a feature length film. The idea barely fits into 2 minutes. I’m getting old. I just don’t get this MacGruber thing. I have to move on.

Rock and roll news is good. The rock band known as Bleach Battalion is preparing its forces for a global onslaught. The onslaught commences on May 29 at the Box Social, next to the Congress Theater. We had a practice last night and although I practiced the set twice through at home, I wasn’t that geeked. I just wasn’t playing the songs that well. I always show up, but I was tempted to call in sick on this one. So I get there early, and the new bassist is already there. Score. We can start early. So we run through the set and it was not so good cuz the new guy was getting up to speed and I was getting warmed up. Then we went through it again and it was definitely passable. We took a break and shot the shit. It’s so fun listening to their punk rock stories. I love the stories. They were all sitting outside back in the day just hanging on the porch and one of their weird buddies just picks up brick and goes up to somebody’s house and throws it through their picture window. In broad daylight. Anarchy. I don’t condone that type of destruction, but it makes for a good story. After the chat we decided to run through the set one more time. We nailed it. I was pretty happy with my playing, everyone else seemed really excited about it. I figured the bassist would realize that I’m not that good but he’s all like “your rock solid man, very steady.” It helped me to have the bass there and I dunno, it all came together we sounded really tight. A couple more practices and we’ll be ready for sure.

I know I had some other things to shout about, but I can’t remember them now. That’s ok cuz this is already really long. In case you were wondering, it’s actually two blogs that got smooshed together. If you want to read more blogs I found a couple good ones, quixotic dancer is pretty entertaining when she writes, and this woman Danka is linked off of the QD blog. I totally forgot to mention the crazy market tumult of last week. It was crazy. You can read about it all over the place. Computers gone wild, not nearly as fun as girls gone wild.

Another pleasant valley Sunday

2010-05-02T06:04:00.001-07:00

Another pleasant valley Sunday

Current mood: strong

I’m trying to think what I have to say. It’s been weeks since I’ve checked in. Hrm. I practiced with Bleach Battalion last Thursday. It went pretty well. The songs sound good and we’ve got a lot of time before the shows, so they will get better and better. I have been practicing the new tunes and I’m thinking I’ll be pretty set to play the shows. So we have a show booked for June 12 and Off with their heads is playing that night. I’m gonna try to make it to the OWTH show after our show. I think we are playing early. Then I find out that The Arrivals are opening for OWTH. Total bummer. I gotta try to make it for that. On the bummer tip, I was driving home from practice on Thurs and I got a flat. Total barforama. I was way bummed and I didn’t want to have to pay for the new tire. Then I remembered that I got the “road handler” warranty. I went in to Sears and the guy says it’s gonna be $60 to replace the tire. This sounds like a good deal. Then just out of curiosity I ask, “Why is it so much? What’s the charge.” Then the guy does some figuring and says, “Oh well it’s only gonna be $30.” Bonus. So I got a new tire for $30 and that includes another road handler warranty on the new tire for 9 bux. Not bad. That worked out.

While I was getting my tire changed, I took a foray into the mall. First stop, Sears. I wasn’t real geeked about hitting Sears. When I was a kid, Sears was ok cuz they had a toy section. At some point they did away with the toys and now I look at sears as a great place to go if you want to pay more for something than it would be at most other places. Especially the electronics. I’m not cool with getting hosed, so I’m not cool with Sears. Anyway, I’m in Sears, so I start to look around. They had a 3D tv going with that Aliens Vs. Monsters movie. I put on the glasses and gave it a shot. It was actually pretty cool. It worked. It was def 3d. I would say it had more depth than stuff jumped out at you, but stuff def jumped out too. I just couldn’t see using glasses to watch TV. That’s lame. Although it might be cool if they showed Sports in 3D. If they could do that, it might make the technology take off. I’m thinking Football might be especially cool in 3D. As of right now, I don’t think it’s necessary to have a 3D TV, although it is a nice toy. Video games in 3D would be nuts too, I’m sure that’s coming. They gotta do that. The kids will have to have it, and as we all know, if the kids have to have it, they usually get it.

After the novelty of the 3d tv wore off, I moved on to other stores. I’m always glad to walk out of Sears cuz I know better things are ahead. I had time to kill and I needed to hit a store where I could do that. I also needed to charge my Iphone. Sharper Image. Perfect spot. I walk into SI and go right up to an iphone boombox and hook my Iphone up to start charging. I start walking around and all the sudden music off of my iphone starts rocking through the store. I’m like…total score. I get to charge my iphone, shop, and enjoy my music instead of the crap they were spitting out, which was foreigner I think (well foreigner’s not bad, but they were playing Jazz or some other junk mixed in.) While I was shopping I heard (from my ipod): Novacaine by Green Day, Getting old/losing touch by The Methadones, Sometimes by Perfect, and some other stuff. It was pretty kick ass. I’m not sure if the other patrons appreciated it, but I did. When I rolled out of there I had an awesome shopping experience and ¾ charge on my phone. There are always a lot of cool items at Shaper Image, but the coolest thing I saw was a pair of glasses that basically were a TV. You put them on and it was like watching a 50 inch TV or something. They worked pretty good, but when you take them off you have to adjust your focus and I’m thinking too much of that is not good for you. Like in the Jerk when everyone’s eyes got crossed, I’m thinking that might happen to you if you watch too much TV on the TV glasses. Cool item though. They also cost like 300 bucks. Not really worth it. Def one of those items that like 20 years ago or more you were like, “Dude, someday they are gonna have glasses that you put them on and you can watch TV.” Well that day has arrived my friends.

My final stop before getting my car was the Apple store. The place was packed. Apple is such a scam. You gotta love how they cornered the market in digital music. It still baffles my mind how they pulled that off. Then they did quite a number on the cellphone industry. Now they’ve got the ipad. I’m just not sure about this contraption. I checked it out. I was playing this game where you try to get the marble through the labyrinth. It was pretty stupid. Then I tried to play a racing game that didn’t work. I tried to use the keyboard which was an absolute waste of time. Trying to touchtype on the ipad is useless. It’s a mess. I type well and I couldn’t even type one word. You can’t rest your fingers on the keys, so You have no idea if you are even close to the home keys with your fingers hovering over the keyboard. It’s an exercise in futility. Typing texts on iphone is annoying, but on the Ipad, it’s just simply useless. I’m guessing the Ipad is trying to be a kindle on steroids. It was not light. I have to say it was prolly a pound. I’m guessing the kindle weighs like a quarter pound at most. I didn’t try to surf the net with it. I just got annoyed with it and bailed. It seemed like a giant Itouch/Iphone. If you have an Iphone, I don’t think you need an Ipad. Maybe other people have uses for them, I dunno. The people who worked in the store were carrying Ipads around like clipboards, I could see that. Maybe coaches and other clipboard holders (inventory people in a warehouse) will start using Ipads. That makes sense to me, it would allow them to track changes and write notes, juggle stuff around and surf porn. It all makes sense to me.

I know I had some other shopping adventures from Saturday, I just can’t remember what they were. One very strange thing over the weekend, A squirrel died right in front of my car. I was parked in the driveway, and there was a dead squirrel there. I didn’t run it over, it looked pretty normal, not flat, it was just dead. I’m thinking that maybe it fell out of a tree and broke its neck. Or it might have had a heart attack. Squirrels live a high stress life, they are always having to watch their nuts. So this morning was Garbage pickup, so I had to take a shovel and drop the squirrel in the can. I prolly should have said a few words, I mean words other than “oh geez, this is nasty. Oh my. I hope I don’t get rabies.” So yeah. The Squirrel is off to squirrel heaven and an unlimited supply of nuts. Lucky, Lucky, squirrel.

2010-04-30T18:30:00.001-07:00

food etc
Current mood: exhausted

The best thing happened the other day. Well it wasn’t really the best thing but it was totally real and totally out of a movie. I was sitting in my boss’s office, he was talking to me, and I involuntarily just started to space out. I started thinking about what I had for lunch. He was going on about something important but the words were just not breaking through. I had this Italian wrap for lunch and pieces of the meat were stuck in my teeth, it was making my teeth feel funny. I have floss at work and I’m not sure why I didn’t bust it out, but that’s beside the point. My boss was talking and I started thinking about how some Italian deli meat has spices in it. You can see it and it makes the meat colorful. Then I started thinking about the most colorful meat and it has to be Olive loaf. I have never had olive loaf and I don’t like olives. Olive loaf is like the perfect example of meat that has something else in it. I mean you can see the cross section of the olive, that’s part of the package. It almost looks like a cool domino. I think for many years, basically my whole life, Olive loaf has been right there in front of me and I never considered that it’s meat with olives in it. It was always just a colorful thing in the deli cooler. IT’S FUkKING OLIVE LOAF PEOPLE! Respect that.

That was kind of a revelation to me. It doesn’t really compare to another food revelation that I heard about recently. Well I told you guys about my buddy Dave at work who thinks in Math. He’s a smart dude and he left so I was sad about that. He was from China and prolly came to the US, maybe in the last 5 years, prolly more like 10 years ago or so. He still wasn’t exactly up on a lot of American culture. So anyway. I’m in the kitchen (on Dave’s last day.) And the facilities guy gives Dave a jar of peanut butter and says you can keep that. Dave was like, “Oh thank you.” I was like, “What’s up with the PB.” The facilities guy says, “Dave just tried Peanut Butter for the first time last week and he basically has had it every day since.” Now that’s a revelation, the idea that something delicious to you was right under your nose for years and finally you tried it and loved it. There are so many things like that out there for everyone. This could probably be applied to someone’s love life too. Your match is out there, maybe right under your nose, and how awesome will it be when you make that connection. Or maybe you’ll find something more delicious than Peanut Butter or your next favorite band. It’s all out there. Just go find it. Oh yeah, and stay hopeful cuz the World is your oyster.

That would be a good place to end right? Well not this time. I’ve got more to say, and instead of ending on that perfect poignant note, I’m gonna let this thing wind down until by the end you are like, “he should’ve just stopped after oyster.” Sound good? Ok. I gotta stick with food cuz I did have a mini food revelation the other day. I don’t like berries. I really don’t like any kind of berry. Blue, Rasp, Boysen, Straw, Black, dingle, you name it. I do eat strawberries once in a while. But other berries I don’t dig. I had a blueberry on my plate. One berry. I couldn’t eat it. It hitchhiked on some melon, and I ate the melon, but blew off the berry. I have gone blueberry picking though and that isn’t bad. You don’t have to eat the blueberries though, you can just pick them.

I went to an estate sale the other day and I was kinda skeptical because I drove up and it looked like a professional estate sale and the house was a dump. I went in anyway. My suspicions were correct. It was a scam. Some company was running it and instead of there being a 500 dollar lionel train for 50 bucks, the train was 500. Everything was half off and the thing was ending in like an hour. I didn’t see much that I liked. I was kinda looking for old stereo equipment and I’m not sure why. At the end I started looking through this box of old pictures. There were some really cool shots of mountains and stuff. The pix must’ve been taken on like kodachrome or something cuz they were old school 50s looking photos which for some reason look way better than the photos we have today. There were like 20 pix in there. They were marked on the back like 1 or 2 dollars each. I took the stack to the lady and I’m like, “Are these the prices?” She’s like, “Well everything is half off.” I’m like, “I’ll give you $5 for this whole stack.” She’s like, “No way.” I’m like. Ok. Bye bye. I don’t need a bunch of old pix anyway. They were cool though. . They weren’t in pristine condition. So I went on Ebay and I was looking for old pix to see what they go for. Well as you can guess, they are offered for like 9 bucks, with no buyers. Shocker. I did find an awesome original pic that would make a great album cover or something. Check it.